You might instead try imaging what it would be like if you did go back to church and began openly questioning. Here's a little Penn story to get your humorous creative juices flowing:
Trust me, as long as you don't actually have the debate, it can be very funny. If you have it, it'll only be funny later, like when you look back on vacation mishaps.
Quote:I started arguing with the pastor. At first he encouraged me to ask anything. . . . I read "Why I Am Not a Christian" and Catch-22, and lots of Vonnegut. My discussions with the pastor got better and better, and then they got really great, and then. . . he needed to have a little talk with my parents. He explained to them that I wasn't getting much out of youth group. He told them with a laugh that I was converting the other children to atheism. . . .My quitting the church was sanctioned by the church. Sweet!Penn Jillette, God, No! Signs You Might Already Be An Atheist and other Magical Tales
Trust me, as long as you don't actually have the debate, it can be very funny. If you have it, it'll only be funny later, like when you look back on vacation mishaps.
If there is a god, I want to believe that there is a god. If there is not a god, I want to believe that there is no god.
