Is there a solution to this problem?

[Ace Otana]

You're not comfortable with the idea of living with someone you don't know very well, and who you don't have any activities/interests in common. Don't do it, is what I say. Especially if you are expected to support them. If you do move in, I would hope that you arrange a roommate style situation where you equally chip in on things like rent and food etc. If you support her, it's a HUGE commitment.

Also, I hate to be a downer, but if she had unprotected sex in the last few years, which she obviously did, then has she been tested for AIDS? Also, are her drugs hard ones, eg needle ones, eg AIDS again? If you are going to be having sex with her, you might want to know her status.

The whole thing has a bad feel to it. It's good diplomacy is a strong point of yours. Maybe you can stay friends in a manner that causes no hurt feelings. I would run a mile a minute. In my experience, a strong longing for someone does not in the least make up for any problems, other than make you put up with them longer, just dragging things out.

On the other hand, I could be completely wrong and a pessimist about these things.

You know, all those things have entered my mind. I've been thinking about all of this for months. Only to come to one conclusion - walk away.
I'm going to try and stabalize our friendship but relationship wise? Well that's gone like the titanic. 3 years ago, I felt comfortable with the idea of being with her, 3 years later and with the situation changed, I no longer feel the same. Purhaps both my reasoning and feelings are telling me the same thing.
Problems unsolved, despite strong desires for each other are still problems unsolved. Perhaps I'd be doing myself a favour by keeping a distance. To be on the safe side.
I don't like commitments, but I don't mind commiting myself to a lover but to both a lover and a child. This I cannot.