RE: Understanding the British.
June 16, 2010 at 6:45 am
(This post was last modified: June 16, 2010 at 6:49 am by Oldandeasilyconfused.)
FOR the tourist visiting OZ
NO ONE SAYS "CRIKEY!"
If visiting you should be aware the 'L' in 'Australia' is silent.
'Bastard' may be used a term of endearment ,but only between close friends. If said to a stranger you may find yourself king hit (one punch knock out)
The word 'ass" is pronounced 'arse' or 'bum' . A 'fanny' is a vagina.
It's OK to call other males 'mate, even as you are glancing around for a blunt to object with which to make your point.
'Root' is a polite word for 'fuck' and is used by both sexes with gay abandon.
There are few mortal insults in Australia. One is to call someone a 'bludger".Originally slang for pimp,today it means parasite. Also not a good idea to call a woman a 'skanky moll' (unless you are referring Paris Hilton)
Common terms for drunk: Pissed,pissed as a fart, pissed as a newt, legless,shitfaced ,(also means high on drugs) shickered ,(Yiddish) tired and emotional,well oiled.
"Pissed off" means 'angry'. To tell some one to 'piss off ' is a slightly less offensive way of saying 'fuck off'.
AT the barbecue,remember to take twice as much beer as you intend to drink, say a slab of 24 bottles. Also remember to make a pass at the host's wife. He'll take it as a compliment and she'll be flattered. Do NOT have a go at the shy young thing who looks like Elle McPherson. That's young Chantelle, she's 12. It's also considered bad manners vomit on any of the family pets. Better to do it on the shag pile.
Do come down for a visit. Ignore the stories you may have heard about our so-called dangerous fauna .We have plenty of anti venom for the snakes, spiders and octopi. The crocodiles live 2000 miles up north and only eat the odd Japanese tourist who tries to pet them. You won't get eaten by a shark if you don't go swimming in the sea.There are no sharks in our estuaries up north,the salt water crocodiles kill them.
Oh,it's not OK to call anyone a cunt.
NO ONE SAYS "CRIKEY!"
If visiting you should be aware the 'L' in 'Australia' is silent.
'Bastard' may be used a term of endearment ,but only between close friends. If said to a stranger you may find yourself king hit (one punch knock out)
The word 'ass" is pronounced 'arse' or 'bum' . A 'fanny' is a vagina.
It's OK to call other males 'mate, even as you are glancing around for a blunt to object with which to make your point.
'Root' is a polite word for 'fuck' and is used by both sexes with gay abandon.
There are few mortal insults in Australia. One is to call someone a 'bludger".Originally slang for pimp,today it means parasite. Also not a good idea to call a woman a 'skanky moll' (unless you are referring Paris Hilton)
Common terms for drunk: Pissed,pissed as a fart, pissed as a newt, legless,shitfaced ,(also means high on drugs) shickered ,(Yiddish) tired and emotional,well oiled.
"Pissed off" means 'angry'. To tell some one to 'piss off ' is a slightly less offensive way of saying 'fuck off'.
AT the barbecue,remember to take twice as much beer as you intend to drink, say a slab of 24 bottles. Also remember to make a pass at the host's wife. He'll take it as a compliment and she'll be flattered. Do NOT have a go at the shy young thing who looks like Elle McPherson. That's young Chantelle, she's 12. It's also considered bad manners vomit on any of the family pets. Better to do it on the shag pile.
Do come down for a visit. Ignore the stories you may have heard about our so-called dangerous fauna .We have plenty of anti venom for the snakes, spiders and octopi. The crocodiles live 2000 miles up north and only eat the odd Japanese tourist who tries to pet them. You won't get eaten by a shark if you don't go swimming in the sea.There are no sharks in our estuaries up north,the salt water crocodiles kill them.
Oh,it's not OK to call anyone a cunt.
