(December 11, 2014 at 11:48 am)watchamadoodle Wrote: Here is my situation:
I am a middle-aged, unmarried guy, but my mother is a devout Christian and my siblings and their families are also Christian (although Christianity isn't central to their life in the way that it is to my mother's life). I visit my mother several times per week, because she lives alone.
I haven't been to church for several years, and my family is aware that I have had doubts about Christianity, but I have concealed my growing certainty that Christianity is false. I still find myself thinking Christian thoughts, and sometimes I wonder if Christians are interacting with a God of some kind even though the religion is factually false.
I've concealed my disbelief in Christianity, because I know it would upset my mother (she would worry that I am going to hell). I don't think anybody else in my family would care too much. I often watch Christian TV or movies with my mother. Sometimes we go to Christian bookstores. I don't go to church, but I've thought about attending a service now and then too.
I feel very conflicted. Concealing my true feelings is somewhat disrespectful. I feel a mixture of contempt and pity for Christians. I wish I could speak openly, but I don't want to poison their faith if it makes them happy. I hate the way Christianity divides people through the heaven and hell nonsense.
Just wondering if others face these issues?
Here's a thought.
You know that feeling that all other Christians have had the personal moment with their god and he moved through them and spoke with them, and you remember how you felt that although it hasn't happened to you just yet, you are still waiting and you are certain it will come?
Well they are all waiting for it to come. It's the big unspoken secret none of them will admit.
MM
"The greatest deception men suffer is from their own opinions" - Leonardo da Vinci
"I think I use the term “radical” rather loosely, just for emphasis. If you describe yourself as “atheist,” some people will say, “Don’t you mean ‘agnostic’?” I have to reply that I really do mean atheist, I really do not believe that there is a god; in fact, I am convinced that there is not a god (a subtle difference). I see not a shred of evidence to suggest that there is one ... etc., etc. It’s easier to say that I am a radical atheist, just to signal that I really mean it, have thought about it a great deal, and that it’s an opinion I hold seriously." - Douglas Adams (and I echo the sentiment)
"I think I use the term “radical” rather loosely, just for emphasis. If you describe yourself as “atheist,” some people will say, “Don’t you mean ‘agnostic’?” I have to reply that I really do mean atheist, I really do not believe that there is a god; in fact, I am convinced that there is not a god (a subtle difference). I see not a shred of evidence to suggest that there is one ... etc., etc. It’s easier to say that I am a radical atheist, just to signal that I really mean it, have thought about it a great deal, and that it’s an opinion I hold seriously." - Douglas Adams (and I echo the sentiment)
