To peace and love Christians

[Jenny A]

Time to wheel out my hilarious stuff again:

Liberal: Claims their religion is sort-of true, and follows almost none of it.

Moderate: Claims their religion is totally true, and follows some of it.

Extremist: Claims their religion is totally true, and follows almost all of it.

Which one is the biggest hypocrite

I don't know enough about Islam or Judaism to this with those, but for Christians it goes more like this:

Liberal: Claims that the heaven and forgiveness of sins part is true, but the uncomfortable bits like hell aren't. Says Jesus was a great moral teacher, but rarely reads the Gospels. Is sure Jesus was a liberal and that when he said to give away your possessions, he meant vote for higher taxes. Says the Old Testament and some of the New Testament should be read metaphorically. May believe in something else on the side like Buddhism, Hinduism, Wicca, or even Ra. Can't explain how both heaven and reincarnation work, but what the hell, it's woo. He may rarely attend church (unless he's Unitarian) but he loves to go on retreats.

Moderate: Claims the Bible is spiritually true (whatever that might mean). Believes most of it, but doesn't like to think about the uncomfortable parts. May not believe in hell or at least doesn't like to think about it. Probably does not believe in The Rapture, and is not looking for The End Times. Likes to think of Jesus as clean cut version of himself. Church attendance may vary from three times a week to once a year. The older he is, the more often he attends. Attends goes up for a while on the birth of a child.

Extremist: Says the Bible is one hundred percent true, but only acts on the mean spirited nasty bits. Touts turning the cheek and love your neighbor in debate, but certainly does not behave that way. Thinks Jesus was an anti-commie, gun toting capitalist who loved the middle class. Considers socialism is a form of theft and therefore a sin. Spends much time thinking about the Rapture and The End Times and might possibly be actively trying to hurry them along. Likes mystical numbers and signs. Won't sleep in room 666 and may think that his zip code or social security number is an attempt to brand him with the mark of the beast. Either never goes to church because he doesn't believe in organized religion or his whole social circle is based upon one church.