(September 19, 2019 at 1:32 pm)LadyForCamus Wrote: Probably much larger than 10% considering the heaviest people in this country tend to also be the sickest, the poorest, and the least educated.
Okay. Even if it's 20%, that still means the vast majority of obese people are probably mentally healthy enough to at least make a conscious decision about losing weight.
Quote:If they’re sick, uneducated, and impoverished, I suspect they’re at quite a disadvantage when it comes to the knowledge, means, and opportunity necessary to achieve a total and permanent lifestyle change. Notice I didn’t say “impossible”; I said “disadvantage”. For a single, teen mom of three who lives in squalor, and works two jobs while simultaneously trying to get her GED, weight loss might not even be 10th on her immediate priority list. Someone has to give her a reason she should care at all, and a reason to think she can, before we can even talk about the logistics of how, and what types of expectations are reasonable for her at this stage in her life. It’s far more complicated than just, “she chooses not to, and that sucks”.
Good thing discerning between disadvantage and impossible. I was at a disadvantage too. I had plenty of disadvantages. I chose to lose the weight. Once again, you give one example of a person who just can't do it, I can give you dozens of examples of people who did. This really doesn't prove anything one way or another.
Quote:Those people in my example were real people, not a reductio ad absurdism. And sadly, there are a very many of them. It’s not that they can’t choose. It’s that they may not see a practical reason to give a shit right now. That’s why they need support rather than blame.
Okay... and? I have examples of real people too, who lost the weight, and are much happier now. People I personally know, worked out with and helped. This proves nothing. Saying "they need support rather than blame" says nothing. Unfortunately, they probably are to blame for their continued overeating. They also probably need support. The two are not mutually exclusive. If my friend is overeating, I'm not going to torture the person about it. But I will be honest with them if they ask my opinion. I'm not going to enable destructive behaviors just because they "need support."
If they want to talk about something, great. I'll be there for them as a friend, because I care about them. But supporting someone and enabling someone are two very different things.
Quote:And, that mind set is the reason those people get blamed (which never helps), rather than actually helped. Are you ready to revoke my reputation point yet? 😛
Once again, more attempts to discredit the concept of personal responsibility. "I can't lose weight because people won't tend to my needs which makes me feel bad and causes me to overeat."
Yea. Bullshit.
Quote:Succeeding in losing weight does not make one an expert on the reasons why others have so far failed. I don’t consider any of those things excuses either. I consider them road blocks that take a tremendous amount of work, resources, opportunity, and support to get around. If society keeps telling these people that they’re “just making excuses”; ie. blaming them; don’t you think that hurts their chances at getting what they need to be successful?
Nope.
There's a concept you should look into called 'locus of control.' Read up on it.
You seem to have this concept of me that I'm running around pointing and laughing at fat people. That couldn't be farther from the truth. I empathize with the struggle. I also learned to overcome the struggle. So while I get how hard it can be, saying "it's hard" is just an excuse. At the end of the day, it's all excuses. We all have to manage our own minds and decide who we want to be. And we can all blame our problems in life on other people and factors outside of our control. Or, we can take control of what's in our control, and drive the direction of our lives toward something more positive.
Or, you can choose to blame anyone and everyone but yourself. And that's where I stop empathizing with people.
If you're frightened of dying, and you're holding on, you'll see devils tearing your life away. But if you've made your peace, then the devils are really angels, freeing you from the Earth.