Do you wish there's a god?

[Belacqua]

Certainly looks that way:

No, you accused me of saying that only people who believe can study the subject. 

What I really said is that emotions can determine how we study a subject. In many cases people make a serious effort in a field because they love the field. It seems clear to me that many people also fail to study a subject seriously because they already feel they hate it. 

In my case, I learned about theology by studying art and literature. At a certain point, if you want to understand, say, Brueghel, you have to know what his theology is. He paints that way because of what he believes about God. And it's certainly true that I loved painting before I knew anything at all about art history or aesthetics. The beauty of it grabbed me from an early age and it has been my pleasure to work on it all my life. 

And then I learned there are also beautiful ideas. Just as some pictures are good to look at, and some melodies good to hear, there are some ideas that are good to think. Not even to believe, necessarily, just to think. I find most of Plotinus to be this way. It's very beautiful. There is an attraction in it which I call love.