cash for good grades

[Tiberius]

Giving monetary incentives is a great idea; shame on the parents / teachers who tell you not to do it. Not only are you getting your kid to actually learn more, you are instilling a great work ethic that a lot of the other kids simply won't have.

[Napoléon]

Yeah, whether it's money or some other kind of reward, it's not the reward itself that matters. It's the simple fact that good behaviour is being rewarded in some way.

[Autumnlicious]

Yeah, whether it's money or some other kind of reward, it's not the reward itself that matters. It's the simple fact that good behaviour is being rewarded in some way.

THIS.

This is exactly what's wrong.

Mindless "rewarding" of actions you normally expect out of a normal thinking human devalues the extraordinary actions. Christ, talk about super entitlement syndrome here...

And what happens if you need to migrate away from giving them some reward? That they've grown old enough where that is to be expect and required, not simply "asked for"?

I'm fairly certain they'll read your intent to quit rewarding them as frequently well...

[Napoléon]

THIS.

This is exactly what's wrong.

Mindless "rewarding" of actions you normally expect out of a normal thinking human devalues the extraordinary actions. Christ, talk about super entitlement syndrome here...

And what happens if you need to migrate away from giving them some reward? That they've grown old enough where that is to be expect and required, not simply "asked for"?

I'm fairly certain they'll read your intent to quit rewarding them as frequently well...

How is it a human learns from a young age what is good and what is bad? Is it simply the punishment of bad things and the ignoring of the good?

No one is talking about rewarding normal behaviour. A's and B's are not 'average' grades, they are above average grades. I don't see a single thing wrong with rewarding good behaviour. If you do, then you are ignorant to how human beings work as a social animal and how they are motivated. Sure not all humans are reward incentive motivated, but ALL of us work for some kind of reward surely.

[Autumnlicious]

If they're not doing academically well enough, perhaps addressing the root of the problem is better than simply paying them off in cash?

If they're unhappy with never being able to buy things, then either offer an allowance for chores done or have them get a job. Be supportive, drive them around, etc,. Help solve the issues in their life and offer them an infrastructure to develop their own life path. That probably is infinitely of more value to a youth than simple hush money.

Get them started with basic things, like phones (but let them choose it and make it a super simple phone), an older laptop (the ones you get for 200$), etc,. Then offer them a way to improve their outlook -- like that aforementioned job/chores.

Children and young adults are thinking beings. They know when they're being patronized, treated lesser or otherwise ignored. While most of them at certain points cannot understand rather basic concepts, they learn rather fast. Idle rewards are easy pickings -- I expect any intelligent child to figure out how to get those and remain at just that.

Though, to be fair, in the grand context of this thread, rewarding your kid because they made honor roll (holding a set gpa for a certain time) is definitely a must do. But then again, you're celebrating and recognizing them event and importance of long term accomplishment, than short term goals.

[Napoléon]

If they're not doing academically well enough, perhaps addressing the root of the problem is better than simply paying them off in cash?

If they're unhappy with never being able to buy things, then either offer an allowance for chores done or have them get a job. Be supportive, drive them around, etc,. Help solve the issues in their life and offer them an infrastructure to develop their own life path. That probably in infinitely more of value to a youth than simple hush money.

Yeah, those are probably better ideas than simply giving them cash. However I still think it's fine to reward a child for doing well with a bit of money. Some creatures just need a carrot dangled above their head and they will chase it. Some do not. Whatever works right?

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But then again, you're celebrating and recognizing them event and importance of long term accomplishment, than short term goals.

Yes I think that's the essence of it. Rewarding them with money is simply a short term way to reward them. There are most definitely better ways to teach them a good work ethic, but it still doesn't make rewarding them with money a bad thing

[jackman]

in actuality, she isn't rewarded with this particular deal for every grading period, this was based on the only time she's slipped and had some Cs. i wanted to nip it in the bud early and tell her both, that Cs won't fly and stress the importance of getting them back up where they usually are.

both sides have merit. i certainly will not have an entitled child on my hands, i grew up quite poor and didn't realize there was anything wrong, that's because there wasn't. as well, i will continue to make sure her achievements are noticed in whatever way that makes sense at the time - not always cash. either way, she knows top grades are the best way to go and will work to achieve that.

on a side note: napoleon, yes i know i type in lowercase and it annoys people, but it's a bad habit i've been into since coding software. naming conventions and all. i knew someone would call me out on it. lol.

moros, that's awesome (your last post, lol). that is how i raise her. we go to zoos, safaris, natural history museums, we camp incessantly, so i can teach her about nature. in fact, i have to stop her mom from buying her everything she wants all the time. i decide the only way to counteract it is to stress learning outside of school as well as in. she's learning that she's responsible for everything she does - good or bad.

[Kayenneh]

Yes I think that's the essence of it. Rewarding them with money is simply a short term way to reward them. There are most definitely better ways to teach them a good work ethic, but it still doesn't make rewarding them with money a bad thing

I actually think that money as a reward for older children is a good idea in the long run. It teaches them the value of money and how to handle it. And in the OP it was mentioned about donating half to a charity, which teaches the child that all his/her incomes will eventually be taxed.

[Napoléon]

i wanted to nip it in the bud early and tell her both, that Cs won't fly

Be careful not put too much pressure on your kid though

[jackman]

i wanted to nip it in the bud early and tell her both, that Cs won't fly

Be careful not put too much pressure on your kid though

i hear what you're saying man, but i kinda like pressure. it sorta let's her know that things won't be easy and if she's not pushing, she won't achieve anything more than status quo. i won't discourage her tho, so in that sense, you're absolutely right!