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Creationism = Pure Freaking Magic
#1
Creationism = Pure Freaking Magic
creationism is just pure freaking magic, if God created everything and spoke everything into existence what did he say, hocuss pocuss, expeto protrunum, abracadabra and wish on a star. God is a Wizard or Sorcerer, wait a sec shouldn't we burn those?
"Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful" - Edward Gibbon (Offen misattributed to Lucius Annaeus Seneca or Seneca the Younger) (Thanks to apophenia for the correction)
'I am driven by two main philosophies:
Know more about the world than I knew yesterday and lessen the suffering of others. You'd be surprised how far that gets you' - Neil deGrasse Tyson
"Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it." - Mark Twain
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#2
RE: Creationism = Pure Freaking Magic
Well.....good question but

Genesis 1

Quote:31 God saw all that he had made, and it was very good.

Yet, apparently this heavenly fuckup did such a shitty job that a short time later he had to drown every fucking living thing.

Some "god."
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#3
RE: Creationism = Pure Freaking Magic
(May 27, 2012 at 6:18 pm)Minimalist Wrote: Well.....good question but

Genesis 1

Quote:31 God saw all that he had made, and it was very good.

Yet, apparently this heavenly fuckup did such a shitty job that a short time later he had to drown every fucking living thing.

Some "god."

yep and him/his son took three days to re spawn, come on seriously. All mighty my ass unless he got his with major lag.
"Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful" - Edward Gibbon (Offen misattributed to Lucius Annaeus Seneca or Seneca the Younger) (Thanks to apophenia for the correction)
'I am driven by two main philosophies:
Know more about the world than I knew yesterday and lessen the suffering of others. You'd be surprised how far that gets you' - Neil deGrasse Tyson
"Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it." - Mark Twain
Reply
#4
RE: Creationism = Pure Freaking Magic
Apparently as 'god' aged he degenerated from a being who could drown the whole fucking world to a passive-aggressive little prick who can do no more than say "you just wait....when you die you'll burn for eternity."

What's truly amazing is that there are fuckwits who fall for such a ridiculous story.
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#5
RE: Creationism = Pure Freaking Magic
He has gone from the power of global genocide to appearing on a piece of toast. and all of Jesus's tricks can be done by Penn & Teller.
"Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful" - Edward Gibbon (Offen misattributed to Lucius Annaeus Seneca or Seneca the Younger) (Thanks to apophenia for the correction)
'I am driven by two main philosophies:
Know more about the world than I knew yesterday and lessen the suffering of others. You'd be surprised how far that gets you' - Neil deGrasse Tyson
"Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it." - Mark Twain
Reply
#6
RE: Creationism = Pure Freaking Magic
What's this now, the Atheist stand up show? OK, I've got one for you. Did you know that Jesus was made out of rubber? Yeah, he tied his ass to a tree and still managed to walk 40 miles into town.

I swear, I slay myself sometimes... but then so does God, just look at the crucifixion...

ROFLOL
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#7
RE: Creationism = Pure Freaking Magic
[Image: jesus-christ-crucified-cartoon_www-txt2pic-com.jpg]
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#8
RE: Creationism = Pure Freaking Magic
I have a really great joke for you guys. Ready?


... The Bible.
[Image: SigBarSping_zpscd7e35e1.png]
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#9
RE: Creationism = Pure Freaking Magic
Preaching to the choir.

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#10
RE: Creationism = Pure Freaking Magic
There's a Catholic priest, a paedophile and a rapist in a bar. He buys a drink.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
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