All Hail the Second Amendment

[Minimalist]

These bastards.  They shot the muffin mix!

http://www.kptv.com/story/30112055/bulle...muffin-mix

Bullet goes through Castle Rock couples home, ends up in box of muffin mix

[Minimalist]

Good job, dad.

http://www.polkio.com/news/2015/sep/25/r...unded-boy/

During the investigation, deputies learned that the father of the child, 26-year-old Mark Toma, was cleaning several firearms and had left a loaded firearm on a coffee table in reach of his son. It appears that the father stepped away for just a moment and when the father came back into the room his son had grabbed a hold of a .40 caliber handgun and pulled the trigger.

[Minimalist]

Too funny.

http://www.rawstory.com/2015/09/white-ma...black-guy/

White man trying to buy gun shoots self in penis — blames it on a black guy

[Minimalist]

This so rarely happens with a knife.

http://www.tristatehomepage.com/news/loc...l-shooting

18-Year-Old Dies In Accidental Shooting

Investigators say a 15-year-old was handling a gun in a reckless manner. 
Police believe the gun discharged while the juvenile was holding it. 
Investigators say the bullet penetrated a wall and struck Killebrew, who was in another area of the house.

[Minimalist]

 

http://www.cbs6albany.com/news/features/...9103.shtml

Another moron blowing his own balls off.

Authorities said officers had approached Thomas at 1:16 a.m. because he apparently was urinating in the street. As the officers approached, they heard a gunshot and found Thomas had shot himself in the groin. Police said it appeared Thomas had mishandled the weapon, causing it to fire.

Turns out he would have been better off if he'd been handling his dick.

[Minimalist]

Been waiting for one of these.

http://www.rawstory.com/2015/09/texas-go...runs-away/

Texas ‘good guy with a gun’ shoots carjacking victim in head — then runs away

The "good guy with the gun."  The same mythical bullshit as fucking jesus coming back from the dead.

[Salacious B. Crumb]

Been waiting for one of these.

http://www.rawstory.com/2015/09/texas-go...runs-away/

Texas ‘good guy with a gun’ shoots carjacking victim in head — then runs away

The "good guy with the gun."  The same mythical bullshit as fucking jesus coming back from the dead.

You don't see that in the movies. People are very good with handguns in the movies.

[Minimalist]

Everything is easy in the movies.

Real life is harder....especially when you can't remember Rule #1.

http://abc11.com/news/person-wounded-in-...g/1004826/

Sheriff Donnie Harrison said 20-year-old David Padron was disassembling a gun and didn't realize it was loaded before it went off. The bullet hit his brother, 22-year-old Jesus Padron.

And then he shot 'jesus.'  How biblical.

[Minimalist]

https://www.rawstory.com/2015/09/wa-man-...-in-trees/

WA man shoots self in scrotum while fighting off meth hallucinations of ‘Mexicans in trees’

Bethania Palma Markus

Now the reason for including the name of the reporter is this:

Martin Eugene Hoyer, 51, was apparently on day two of a methamphetamine binge when he kicked in his neighbor’s door with a handgun in his waistband. Authorities told the Herald when he did so, the gun went off and a bullet lodged in his scrotum. Hoyer was not seriously hurt but faces assault, harassment and unlawful firearm charges as a result of the incident.

I submit that "Bethania" has never been shot in the balls or she wouldn't say that.

[Minimalist]

Yeah....how's that gun keeping your home "safe" now?

http://www.tennessean.com/story/news/cri.../72967236/

Nashville man fatally shoots girlfriend he thought was intruder