The Last Movie You Watched

[Gawdzilla Sama]

"Gettysburg" Miniseries, 1993.

The four and 1/4 hour depiction of the historical and personal events surrounding and including the decisive American civil war battle features thousands of civil war re-enactors marching over the exact ground that the federal army and the army of North Virginia fought on. The defense of the Little Round Top and Pickett's Charge are highlighted in the actual three day battle which is surrounded by the speeches of the commanding officers and the personal reflections of the fighting men. Based upon the novel 'The Killer Angels'.—Keith Loh <[email protected]>

[Foxaèr]

Not a movie, but a limited series, “Dear Child”. It’s a German series, acting was good. But, couldn’t make it past the first episode. It’s just too dark, plot is about women being abused by this serial kidnapper, so nah, I’ll pass.

I watched it and liked it.

[*Deidre*]

Not a movie, but a limited series, “Dear Child”. It’s a German series, acting was good. But, couldn’t make it past the first episode. It’s just too dark, plot is about women being abused by this serial kidnapper, so nah, I’ll pass.

I watched it and liked it.

Was it graphic? That was my concern. It looks good from an acting perspective.

[Foxaèr]

I watched it and liked it.

Was it graphic? That was my concern. It looks good from an acting perspective.

I don't recall it being particularly graphic.

[Gawdzilla Sama]

Watching "Godzilla v. Kong" for the nth time.

[MR. Macabre 666]

EVIL DEAD, the 2013 version.

[Angrboda]

A Few Good Men.

I only watched the first half so far. I needed a nap.

[Rev. Rye]

This latest update in the Deep Hurting Project is Seltzerberg's Epic Movie. Two things happened with it recently: First, it got officially added to TVTropes' So Bad It's Horrible list, Second: I found a DVD copy in the clearance rack of my local Half-Price Books for $2. For those of you who don't know who Seltzerberg are, well, I don't think I could find a better reflection of their "art" than this clip from The Starving Games.





Take a bunch of disparate elements that might be good on their own and just toss them all together, with no regard for a flavor profile or even whether or not this monstrosity even counts as a burger (or a film) before they market as such. So, let's dive right into this horseshit:

• Is it right for a woman in her 20s to be identified as an orphan?
  
• David Carradine is apparently dead, wearing nothing but a speedo. I wonder if this is going to get really fucking awkward in a few years.
  
• LAme is a 7-letter word?
  
• Hmm... that meal might not be especially scrumptious, but I'm sure Seymour Glass will consider it the most priceless thing on Earth.
  
• How is Nacho Libre an epic movie? Is their definition of "Epic" just "movies made in the past couple years that made their budget back?"
  
• And I thought that they were stretching the definition of "Epic" to its breaking point with Nacho Libre, now they're doing Snakes on a Plane. Whatever, I'm sure Huggy Bear's jacking off to this scene. And wishing he could be the guy who got a snake to bite on his dick.
  
• "I've had it with these GODDAM snakes on this GODDAM plane." Seriously? And he's not even yelling. Fuck, I didn't even get the unrated version.
  
• I liked seeing Wolverine flip people off with his claw when it was Hugh Jackman.
  
• Why the fuck is Magneto the head of this X-academy?
  
• And now we're in the 2005 Wonka Factory. Fuck, is this what Crispin Glover had to deal with so he could make his What is It movies?
  
• Gee, I wonder what this Chocolate river's going to be. Is it shit? Yes, it is shit.
  
• Honestly, I wouldn't have expected this scene of Willy Wonka harvesting organs out of these four people to be scored with "Fergalicious."
  
• Why does the girl with the blue jumpsuit suddenly have a bad case of echolalia?
  
• Don't open that door, McGee! Yeah, Old-Time Radio, I went there.
  
• Okay, so we're in Narnia now. It's probably closer to an epic movie than any of the settings we've had before. And it's got a Silent G at the beginning to keep the C.S. Lewis estate at bay.
  
• "Scarface on Repeat..." I wouldnt have expected them to include Spring Breakers.
  
• Yes, we get it, you could get Jennifer Coolidge.
  
• How is alcohol supposed to rehydrate you?
  
• Remember the big Sudoku craze of 2007? Remember seeing some dumbass pee an entire sudoku puzzle?
  
• This beaver looks like it has all the worst qualities of puppeteering and CGI.
  
• So, what the fuck was that Superman Retuns homage supposed to be in aid of?
  
• Why the fuck is Judas talking, and why is he Clutch Cargo? 
  
• So, two white people, a black girl, and an Indian are quadruplets?
  
• The White Witch flashing a guy to get him to join the dark side was done a lot better on Robot Chicken
  
• That would have been more affecting if it looked like they actually did something to Tumnus.
  
• These jokes about how old the Harry Potter cast were getting were tired even in 2007.
  
• Why is she illiterate?
  
• Hmm... a "Lazy Sunday" parody focused on Pirates of the Carribbean. I wonder if that's going to happen later...
  
  
  
• Why is there clip art of Lionel Richie as a theater usher?
  
• At least the bleeps vary in pitch in a way to make it sound organic to the song.
  
• Why the fuck are these Wonderbread people part of Not-Aslan's entourage?
  
• So they re-enacted the cover of Marian Engel's Bear.
  
• My God, they actually included a slightly more obscure bit of latin in Silas' dialogue. It may just be the Trinitarian Formula, but at least it's something.
  
• No, their reunion won't be a Dr. Phil moment until he sends one of the off to a wilderness camp.
  
• Aslo's dead? How long before he revives?
  
• Also, why the fuck did the X-Men have anything to do with Gnarnia?
  
• Goddammit, this kid's fetishes are bizarre... It's like the Room 237 scene in The Shining if Jack Nicholson was okay with everything happening.  
  
• Why is Jennifer Coolidge Davey Jones now? And why is she a DJ?
  
• Even without throwing that octopus in Jack Sparrow's face, that giant wheel sounds like a crappy melee weapon.
  
• Wow. They used the remote from Click as a Deus Ex Machina. At least they didn't say it was the remote from Funny Games, because if they did, they'd have somehow earned my eternal wrath more than they already have for bringing Michael Haneke into this.
  
  
  
• Also, Borat just randomly appeared. The extended version apparently has more, including out and out plagiarism.
  

Now, I'm off to Jayma Mays' Wikifeet page.

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

I gave the first hobbit film another try. I made it 40 minutes, every one of which was a new experience in pain.

Boru

[Foxaèr]

I gave the first hobbit film another try. I made it 40 minutes, every one of which was a new experience in pain.

Boru