Script for the south park episode featuring dawkins
October 6, 2008 at 7:00 pm
(This post was last modified: October 6, 2008 at 7:00 pm by Edwardo Piet.)
What's do you think of this south park script that parodies dawkins? Is it funny or just plain horrible? Or in-between?
Script for the south park episode featuring dawkins:http://www.spscriptorium.com/Season10/E1012script.htm
I wonder if dawkins knows about this episode lol....
I like south park but I also like dawkins a lot too....obviously it's just a stupid piss-take. It could feel kind of insulting if you're a dawkins fan like me though lol.
Script for the south park episode featuring dawkins:http://www.spscriptorium.com/Season10/E1012script.htm
I wonder if dawkins knows about this episode lol....
I like south park but I also like dawkins a lot too....obviously it's just a stupid piss-take. It could feel kind of insulting if you're a dawkins fan like me though lol.
Quote:Father: Principal Victoria, we are a devout Catholic family! Do you mind telling me why my daughter now thinks she's a retarded fish-frog?!
Mrs. Garrsion: I told you this would happen, didn't I?!
Principal Victoria: Mr. Triscotti, I wasn't aware that-
Mr. Triscotti: We have worked years to instill the teachings of Jesus Christ into our daughter, and in one fell swoop, you try to destroy everything we did!
Mrs. Garrsion: I hear ya.
Principal Victoria: Sir, if you don't wish your daughter to learn about evolution, then we can pull her out of class.
Mr. Triscotti: You most certainly will!
Daughter: But Dad, I want to learn everything.
Mr. Triscotti: No you don't! Shut up! [takes his daughter and leaves the room]
Mrs. Garrsion: Well, I told you. We should leave evolution out of the classrooms.
Principal Victoria: It has become obvious to me that you don't know enough about evolution to teach it! I'm having you replaced! Mr. Dawkins! [Mr. Dawkins enters the office]
Mrs. Garrsion: Re-replaced??
Principal Victoria: Richard Dawkins is a world-renowned evolutionary scientist.
Mr. Dawkins: [courteously] Charmed to meet you. Ms...
Mrs. Garrsion: Shut up, faggot! Principal Victoria, I can teach my own class!
Principal Victoria: You are to sit in class and help Mr. Dawkins with whatever he needs!
[Mrs. Garrison's classroom. Richard Dawkins is the guest teacher now. He takes some chalk and .]
Mr. Dawkins: Over billions of years life has evolved from simple one-celled organisms into all the complex life we see around us. [although all the kids have pencil and paper out ready to take notes, only Kyle is actually writing anything as Dawkins lectures. Mr. Dawkins himself delivers his lecture in a scholarly voice.]
Mrs. Garrison: Whatever.
Mr. Dawkins: [glances over, then continues] It was changes in hereditary traits that allowed the first mammals to breath in the air.
Mrs. Garrison: [relating Dawkin's points to his own] Retarded fish-frogs.
Mr. Dawkins: [a bit shocked] Ms. Garrision, I believe that's a gross over-simplification.
Mrs. Garrison: Well, you're a faggot! [the look of shock returns to Dawkins.] Continue.
Mr. Dawkins: You see, children, life has the amazing ability to change, to adapt. Like changing us to the point that we walk upright.
Mrs. Garrison: So you are saying that we're all related to monkeys.
Mr. Dawkins: [puts the chalk in the holder below the blackboard] Well yes, basically, we are.
Mrs. Garrison: Do you see monkeys at the zoo?! They crap in their hands and throw it at people!
Mr. Dawkins: Ms. Garrison, this isn't theory, it is scientific fact!
Mrs. Garrison: What about the fact that if I believe in this crap, you're gonna go to hell?! Doesn't that bother you a little?
Mr. Dawkins: Actually, no. Because I'm an atheist.
Mrs. Garrison: [rises and walks up to him] AHA! I've got you, you snake in the grass!! I found you out!!
Mr. Dawkins: I never covered it up.
Mrs. Garrison: And if I'm a monkey, then I might as well act like a monkey, huh?! [begins to dance around like a monkey, hooting and hollering. He lowers his pants and poops into his left hand.]
Mr. Dawkins: What on earth are you doing?? [now Butters is the one taking notes]
Mrs. Garrison: Don't ask me, I'm a fuckin' monkey!! [throws the log of feces at Dawkins and gets him on his forehead and on the left side of his sweater]
Mr. Dawkins: AAAH!