Newbie (In more ways than one)

[DarkHorse]

Hi everyone,

I'm 30 and up until a little while ago, a "born again Christian". In church, they always tell you of all the new people who have joined Christianity, and therefore make it sound as if you'll be left behind if you're not also one of the "family". They never tell you of all those who leave this crap behind. Who knows... Maybe they just don't see it.

Anyway, I got tired of always being told that it's wrong to question the bible and all that goes along with it, so for most of my life, I just went along with everything, all the while feeling that something just doesn't sit right inside. I mean, for a book that claims to be the word of god, how can there be so many contradictions and things that just don't make any sense? Eventually I couldn't take it anymore... I was permanently depressed and confused about life and so many things. Then I stumbled upon a book, Conversations with God, and thinking it would help answer my problems with these things, I read it. I wasn't prepared though for what I read, as it went against everything I had ever been taught. But I was captured, and I started reading stuff on the internet, and doing my own research. I didn't want to be a clone anymore, I wanted to know the truth. And for the first time in my life, I'm truly happy. The Christians will argue that God sets us free, and true freedom is found in christ, but that's a load of bullshit. For years, it's what kept me bound and feeling a slave, with no free will. I've had enough.

I wouldn't say I'm an atheist exactly, as I'm still figuring a lot of stuff out. For example, I'm not saying there IS a god, but I'm also not ready to fully let go of the idea that there maybe is one (just not the god the bible talks of. To each their own I guess.

Anyway, I came upon this forum doing a Google search for what I can't even remember, but it doesn't matter. I'm just glad I found this site.

[Psykhronic]

Welcome, DarkHorse! Feel free to explore these forums. Here's a little tip: One can be both an atheist and an agnostic, many of us here admit we do not know for sure if there is a God, we don't believe but also do not know in other words. Also, look into deism - perhaps that sort of view of a higher power suits you, and it's certainly not a Christian take on the whole thing.

And are you a fan of darkhorse comics?

[KichigaiNeko]

"Conversations with God" also helped me

[DarkHorse]

Thanks for the information, Psykhronic! Much appreciated!
I actually had to Google darkhorse comics when you asked about it, lol. Had no idea what it was.

Thanks for the welcome KichigaiNeko.

[KichigaiNeko]

Just keep breathing Dark-Horse..... it's all good

[Psykhronic]

Anytime, DHorse! Haha, it's okay you don't need to know about DarkHorse comics just figured I'd ask

[Ben Davis]

from the UK! I'm glad to hear you're feeling liberated and I hope your continued transition is just as fruitful.

'Born again' types of christianity are notorious for deliberately mischaracterising 'atheists' to put people off leaving the faith. As you learn more, you'll find that the definitions you're used to hearing are drastically wrong. 'Atheism' is nothing more than 'an absence of belief in theism'; everything else, all other beliefs, values, ethics etc. are now up to you! You'll probably find that many will be consistent with what you previously believed because (and here's the whammy!) you probably validated your own beliefs within the context of the christian value-set! But this is truly the biggest freedom; the freedom to explore yourself, your relationships, your world.

Enjoy it!

[Rahul]

Hey DarkHorse. I know how you feel. I gradually deconverted from around the age of 25 to the age of about 31. It takes a while sometimes when you've been indoctrinated so completely. But it gradually wears off of you.

You'll feel a lot more at ease with yourself as you wake completely up from all the BS.

You know that hymn that goes, "I once was blind, but now I see"? Well the ironic thing is that you lived blind as a Christian. Now you're starting to see reality.

It'll get easier. And the idea of god will seem more and more far fetched as the days go by.

Welcome!

[DarkHorse]

But this is truly the biggest freedom; the freedom to explore yourself, your relationships, your world.

Enjoy it!

Ben, I found everything you wrote interesting and see the truth in it. I really enjoyed the above part the most and couldn't agree more. It feels good to have this freedom, and life is exciting again.

Rahul, thanks for your words, I really needed them. I was indeed blind to reality, and sometimes I still get this feeling of guilt when I read up on other things. I can feel the old ways, some of those things I believed all the years, wanting to fight against this new found knowledge. So it makes sense what you wrote in your first line. Thanks again.

[Rahul]

And are you a fan of darkhorse comics?

I am! Whoop!