Noah the movie

[pocaracas]

So god does it in a dream...
Bad people try to take the boat by force...
They fail and the boat gets loaded with animals...
Spends a few days adrift...
Send out a few birds and none comes back...
Send out the dove and it returns with a branch...
Waters recede, the boat hits land...
The end.

"no animals were harmed in the making of this movie".

[JesusHChrist]

Yes, "The Fountain" was a bit of a dud.

But, there's always Black Swan and Requiem for Dream.

[KUSA]

I think Noah was a Time Lord. The Ark is like the Tardis, bigger on the inside than the outside.

[Mr. Moncrieff]

I think Noah was a Time Lord. The Ark is like the Tardis, bigger on the inside than the outside.

Naughty humans were Daleks...?

[pocaracas]

I think Noah was a Time Lord. The Ark is like the Tardis, bigger on the inside than the outside.

Oh... like wizards' tents? (Harry Potter reference)

[EgoRaptor]

The problem isn't the movie, it is the people who are going to watch this & think it a docudrama. Also, there are so many other Bible stories that would make such better moves. I would love to see a Paradise Lost movie (still need to get around to reading that). Unfortunately most of the bible stories would probably offend Christians. Job would make an excellent movie, but Christians would be offended because people would come out thinking god is an asshole.

[Chad32]

A Paradise Lost movie might make people think the devil was not so evil, even though you're supposed to be against him in the end. Unless they just didn't make him as sympathetic in the beginning as the book does. I can guarantee it would be hard to make Yahweh seem like a good person if they made a Job movie and kept it true to the book.

They've done the Moses story a couple of times. One being animated, and the other live action. I remember The Nostalgia Critic reviewing both, and liking the newer one better because it portrays Yahweh as closer to the new testament instead of the old testament.

There was the Passion of the Christ, which was more about the death of Jesus than his teachings. I never saw it, but I've heard it was just about his last days and crucifixion. Not that all of Jesus' teachings were great, but it is an improvement over the old testament.

[Crossless2.0]

For truth in religious movies, I'll stick with "Life of Brian".

[Rev. Rye]

There was the Passion of the Christ, which was more about the death of Jesus than his teachings. I never saw it, but I've heard it was just about his last days and crucifixion. Not that all of Jesus' teachings were great, but it is an improvement over the old testament.

Yes, it pretty much is. It's pretty much just Jesus being tortured and dying for two hours. Really, about the only thing that makes it different from something like Funny Games is that A) Haneke was a good director, and B) It's in poorly-pronounced Latin.

Also, I have to dissent with EgoRaptor's idea that Job would make a good film. As it is, it's more or less a debate on whether or not Job's punishment is justified, one that basically boils down to: "Repent!" "From What?" "Repent!" "From What?" "Repent!" "From What?" "I AM GOD AND AM BEYOND YOUR IDEAS OF GOOD AND EVIL!" "Okay, I repent."

[Crossless2.0]

Also, I have to dissent with EgoRaptor's idea that Job would make a good film. As it is, it's more or less a debate on whether or not Job's punishment is justified, one that basically boils down to: "Repent!" "From What?" "Repent!" "From What?" "Repent!" "From What?" "I AM GOD AND AM BEYOND YOUR IDEAS OF GOOD AND EVIL!" "Okay, I repent."

I agree, but just for fun which actor would you like to see sit in an ash pit, scraping boils for two hours? If the "Left Behind" remake is profitable, I'd nominate Nicholas Cage -- but only if the boils are real.