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what's an atheist funeral like?
#21
RE: what's an atheist funeral like?
(March 21, 2014 at 12:25 pm)Fromper Wrote: I've never been to a funeral that did, but that's because I come from a Jewish family, so all our funerals have had prayers in Hebrew that nobody can understand. And Psalm 23.

With my sister and I being atheists, we're likely to surprise the rest of the family when we leave that stuff out. Of course, that would assume that we plan ahead for our funerals, which I haven't done yet (don't think she has, either).

My boyfriend and I recently had to attend the funeral of my great-uncle. Despite much of it being in Hebrew, he (he's been an atheist since he was 7 but started out in a Baptist upbringing) thought it was much nicer than Christian funerals. I've always thought so - the little rituals are a lot more community-based.

Also, after all of that was said and done, I made a pretty long post on our local atheist facebook page about planning ahead for that shit. You want to do it ASAP - don't leave your family to pick up the pieces. You won't care when you're dead, but my uncle wrapped all his stuff up to the point that my mother had basically fuck all to do but grieve - which is hard enough without the rest of your family picking at each other over possessions, money, responsibilities, etc.
[Image: Untitled2_zpswaosccbr.png]
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#22
RE: what's an atheist funeral like?
(March 21, 2014 at 10:34 am)Thunder Cunt Wrote: what's an atheist funeral like?
Everyone stands around awkwardly, wondering if anyone's going to blurt out "he's in a better place now" so that they can make fun of them.
"Well, evolution is a theory. It is also a fact. And facts and theories are different things, not rungs in a hierarchy of increasing certainty. Facts are the world's data. Theories are structures of ideas that explain and interpret facts. Facts don't go away when scientists debate rival theories to explain them. Einstein's theory of gravitation replaced Newton's in this century, but apples didn't suspend themselves in midair, pending the outcome. And humans evolved from ape- like ancestors whether they did so by Darwin's proposed mechanism or by some other yet to be discovered."

-Stephen Jay Gould
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#23
RE: what's an atheist funeral like?
I went to an atheist funeral about 3 years ago and an almost atheist one (is that possible??) about a year ago.
The atheist one was for a guy who played in a local band and always wore union jack socks and red shoes when he played, the coffin went into the crematorium with the red shoes on top. Friends and relatives read stories about his very colourful life and then we went to his local cricket club for drinks. The evening ended with fireworks. Smile
The other one was almost atheist, one bible reading I think, just top keep the relatives sweet, but they played Pink Floyd's "Shine on You Crazy Diamond" (if you had known the guest of honour you would know that it was very fitting!)
The meek shall inherit the Earth, the rest of us will fly to the stars.

Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups

Arguing with an engineer is like wrestling with a pig in mud ..... after a while you realise that the pig likes it!

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#24
RE: what's an atheist funeral like?
Just found this:-

[Image: 014_carlin_last_word.jpg]
The meek shall inherit the Earth, the rest of us will fly to the stars.

Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups

Arguing with an engineer is like wrestling with a pig in mud ..... after a while you realise that the pig likes it!

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#25
RE: what's an atheist funeral like?
Pretty dead
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#26
RE: what's an atheist funeral like?
i told my mom i dont want no damn christian funeral. i told her i want my ashes thrown into the river here. i know if i die before her there will be all types of christian shit going on.
I hate the bible. I love that do as thy whilst stuff.
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#27
RE: what's an atheist funeral like?
Let me claim u on my taxes.. and il take care of this problem u have.. wink. Wink..
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#28
RE: what's an atheist funeral like?
I told my wife that I don't believe in any kind of afterlife, and if she does any religious shit I'll come back to haunt her! Smile
The meek shall inherit the Earth, the rest of us will fly to the stars.

Never underestimate the power of very stupid people in large groups

Arguing with an engineer is like wrestling with a pig in mud ..... after a while you realise that the pig likes it!

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#29
RE: what's an atheist funeral like?
I remember the funeral of my Sam so well. I had to choose one hymn to be sung at the service, so after some deliberation I decided on "All Things Bright And Beautiful" because that's exactly what she was. I just muted out singing the reference to "the lord god" whenever it came up. All through the service, every time the response "amen" was required, I substituted "oh Sam" instead, since it was after all her day and I wasn't having it hijacked and turned into a party political broadcast.

I'd also been allowed to stand up and read my own personal tribute to my Princess - not a eulogy; that's what you say about dead people - so I spent about a week writing out exactly what I wanted to say. Later I was congratulated by everyone, including the vicar, for making an impressive speech; genuine or not, it was nice to hear. My speech led into the playing of a song that I'd been allowed to choose, something holding a deeply personal meaning for me. I didn't need to think about it. I chose "My Heart Will Go On" from one of Sam's favourite films. Partly for the message but mainly because I will never forget the one special day when we were at home and she put that song on, then with her arms around my neck she gazed into my eyes and sang to me - for those few minutes, we two were the only people in the Universe. When it was played at the service, I was somehow managing to hold it together right up until I heard someone start to cry. That's when I fell to pieces. Even now, just the thought of that song wipes me out - in fact I can feel myself going as I type.

It was the most agonising, yet oddly beautiful, day of my entire life. I hope my own day will be as affecting. And if anyone has a long face at my funeral, I'll never speak to them again.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
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#30
RE: what's an atheist funeral like?
That is beautiful stimbo! What a gem from you. How full of surprises you are! "Oh sam" lol. You are a faithful atheist. Faithful to not comprise your Atheist beliefs or words. God wants us hot or cold and not lukewarm. So you are either hot or cold. I'd say hot!

So stimbo not to derail the thread but would you be willing to not ban my account if I wired my next paycheck to your bank account?
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