You wake up in the hereafter after you die.

[Elskidor]

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[quote='Elskidor' pid='675264' dateline='1400954901']
Get me out of this box! I said I didn't want to be burried, damn you!

Just be glad you didn't get cremated

Can you wake up cremated? I think I would still prefer that than waking up 6 feet under cursed to die again or live forever underground.

[Bittersmart]

I'm going to go with "Sweeeeeet!"

I love life. I love life mostly because I'm in love with my own consciousness. To wake up from "death" and discover that my consciousness is still going strong? That's awesome. As long as I'm not in some tyrant's hell, I think I'd be okay. I've often said that being eternal would get boring after a while, but there's just soooo much to learn. Could an eternal being learn everything? Maybe. Maybe it would get boring after 5 billion years. But initially, my reaction would be..."awesome!"

[Chad32]

My reaction would be more like "Well, looks like there really is an afterlife. I wonder if it means gods exist too.". I don't think it would be either of the options you listed. It would just be a new experience to explore.

[Wyrd of Gawd]

It would probably be the happiest moment of your lives, you guys just won't admit it.

Is there such a thing as a happy zombie? They all look rather rotten and they like to eat brains. They are never clean and they stink.

[Jackalope]

Your initial reaction?

A) "WHAT THE FUCK? I'm still alive? SWEEEEEEET!"

B) "No...this is bullshit...no...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

C) Nice. Where can I get a really good cocktail?

[Ravenshire]

I've got to ask. Which "hereafter?!?" Seriously, even with the thousands described by various cults throughout history there are literally infinite other possibilities. However, If you're talking about something resembling the christer afterlife (some form of eternal bliss or torture), then my response is this:
Oh shit. Really?!?

Because...

Holy fuck, who would want to live forever?!?

Let's say they christers are right. There is a god, he judges us all and gives us the eternity we deserve.

Case 1, getting into heaven:
Ok, so, I passed the test. This is awesome. The christers sure were wrong about the big guy. Sure, I have to do the worship thing every day to the god I never believed in, but there's plenty of time to do all the other stuff there is to do. Right?
100 years later - Wow. still pretty frickin' cool. I've managed to do all the things I ever even thought of putting on my bucket lists but there's still lots to do.
1,000 years later - Ok. this is still good. Got kinda bored with some of the stuff but there so much I can still do.
1,000,000 years later - Well, I guess we could go do that again. It's better than doing the other again.
1,000,000,000 years later - Holy hell I'm bored. There's absolutely nothing left to do I haven't done 100,000 times already.
1,000,000,000,000 years later - Kill me. Kill me now.
1,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *sobbing uncontrollably*
1,000,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *laughing maniacally*
1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *persistent vegetative state*

Guess what, I'm still right at the start of the infinity timeline. *shudders*

Case 2, going to hell:
Well shit, I was wrong. There really is a god and he's just as big a vindictive fuckwad as the christers always said. This sucks.
100 years later - Still sucks
1,000 years later - Still sucks.
1,000,000 years later - Sucks even worse
1,000,000,000 years later - Sucks like a well practiced whore.
1,000,000,000,000 years later - Kill me. Kill me now.
1,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *sobbing uncontrollably*
1,000,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *laughing maniacally*
1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *persistent vegetative state*

Guess what, I'm still right at the start of the infinity timeline. *shudders*

Case 3 (optional), Purgatory:
Well. I guess I was wrong. Christers were right but I guess he's not so bad. At least I'm not roasting in hell.
100 years later - Boring...
1,000 years later - Still Boring.
1,000,000 years later - Really fucking boring.
1,000,000,000 years later - Holy hell, I wish I could have gone to hell instead..
1,000,000,000,000 years later - Kill me. Kill me now.
1,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *sobbing uncontrollably*
1,000,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *laughing maniacally*
1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *persistent vegetative state*

Guess what, I'm still right at the start of the infinity timeline. *shudders*

Case 4 (in this case the christers are wrong), our consciousness is freed from the mortal shackles but continues forever:
Awesome. Not only were the christers wrong, but I really get to rub their noses in it. Fuck yeah, this is gonna be AWESOME!!!
100 years later - Wow. still pretty frickin' cool. I've managed to do all the things I ever even thought of putting on my bucket lists but there's still lots to do.
1,000 years later - Ok. this is still good. Got kinda bored with some of the stuff but there so much I can still do.
1,000,000 years later - Well, I guess we could go do that again. It's better than doing the other again.
1,000,000,000 years later - Holy hell I'm bored. There's absolutely nothing left to do I haven't done 100,000 times already.
1,000,000,000,000 years later - Kill me. Kill me now.
1,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *sobbing uncontrollably*
1,000,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *laughing maniacally*
1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 years later - *persistent vegetative state*

Guess what, I'm still right at the start of the infinity timeline. *shudders*

Why would anyone want any of those outcomes? I wouldn't wish the christer heaven (or any other unending eternity) on my worst enemy, let alone the christer hell. I don't think the 70-80 years that most of can reasonably expect is anywhere near enough, but it's certainly better than forever.

[Fidel_Castronaut]

Really does make you think about how childish and silly notions of an afterlife really are.

It's obviously wishful thinking to believe in such a thing, and I have no doubt that if there is one, it would be nothing like anything imagined by those who believe in it currently.

[max-greece]

An eternity spent thinking - fuck me I was wrong?

Oh no - not for me.

Actually as GBD above says - an eternity of anything wouldn't be for me either.

[BlackMason]

My reaction: Oh shit. God's gonna fuck me. I'd have violent regret. Do a bit of crying and groveling. Then eventually start an insurrection. Shit Lucifer did it and a whole 3rd of angels were convinced. I'd roll dice too.

[Faith No More]

I would say, "Seriously? I have to do this shit again?"