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RE: joke time
February 21, 2017 at 3:11 pm
Did you hear the one about the Catholic neutrinos?
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.
I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.
Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire
Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
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RE: joke time
February 22, 2017 at 2:48 am
I've got a confession to make.... I was brought up by my dad. My mother left me before I was born...
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: joke time
February 22, 2017 at 4:03 am
Why is it hard to solve a redneck murder?
The DNA is all the same and there are no dental records.
Dying to live, living to die.
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RE: joke time
February 22, 2017 at 4:30 am
A distressed old woman phones up her GP and says, 'You told me I had to take that medication for the rest of my life!'
'That's right. What's the problem?. Asks the doctor.
Hysterical now, the old woman says, 'WHY does the prescription say "no repeats?"'
Dying to live, living to die.
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RE: joke time
February 22, 2017 at 4:47 am
Two boobs ate hanging out in a bra when one says to the other, "Hey, lefty. Do you know that when she goes for a run I do kangaroo impressions? Boing! Boing! Boing!"
Lefty is quiet for a moment and then replies, "God, you're a right tit!"
Dying to live, living to die.
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RE: joke time
February 22, 2017 at 4:58 am
That's one of the breast puns EVER!!
Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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RE: joke time
February 22, 2017 at 5:52 am
(February 22, 2017 at 4:58 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: That's one of the breast puns EVER!!
Boru I think I heard it before, it certainly jogged my mammary.
I apologise.
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RE: joke time
February 22, 2017 at 10:29 am
(February 22, 2017 at 4:58 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: That's one of the breast puns EVER!!
Boru
Y'know, brah?
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RE: joke time
February 22, 2017 at 1:27 pm
(February 22, 2017 at 4:58 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: That's one of the breast puns EVER!!
Boru
Man, this joint is really jumpin'.
Got my shoes shined and had to take the boy's word for it.
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.
I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.
Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire
Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
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RE: joke time
March 23, 2017 at 4:18 pm
Quote:Quote:A group of women were at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with their husbands.
Quote:The women were asked, "How many of you love your husband?"
Quote:All the women raised their hands.
Quote:Then they were asked, "When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?"
Quote:Some women answered today, a few yesterday, and some couldn't remember.
Quote:The women were then told to take out their cell phones and text their husband - "I love you, Sweetheart"
Quote:Next the women were instructed to exchange phones with one another
Quote:and read aloud the text message they received in response to their message.
Quote:Below are 12 hilarious replies. If you have been married for quite a while, you understand that these replies are a sign of true love. Who else would reply in such a succinct and honest way?
Quote:1. Who the hell is this?
Quote:2. Eh, mother of my children, are you sick or what?
Quote:3. Yeah, and I love you too. What's wrong?
Quote:4. What now? Did you wreck the car again?
Quote:5. I don't understand what you mean.
Quote:6. What the hell did you do now?
Quote:8. Don't beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need.
Quote:9. Am I dreaming?
Quote:10. If you don't tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die.
Quote:11. I thought we agreed you wouldn't drink during the day
Quote:.
Quote:12. Your mother is coming to stay with us, isn't she.
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