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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

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joke time
BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#6091
RE: joke time
August 17, 2022 at 4:14 am
I've been clean for 47 days!!




Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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Darinda Offline
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#6092
RE: joke time
August 17, 2022 at 8:58 am
A guy sits down at the bar and orders drink after drink. “Is everything okay, pal?” the bartender asks. “My wife and I got into a fight and she said she wasn’t going to talk to me for a month.”

Trying to put a positive spin on things, the bartender says, “Well, maybe that’s kind of a good thing. You know… a little peace and quiet?”

“Yeah. But today is the last day…”
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#6093
RE: joke time
August 18, 2022 at 2:25 am
Me, "I'm here for the booze and the hookers!"


Her, "Ma'am, this is a library!"



Me (whispers), "I'm here for the booze and the hookers!"
Dying to live, living to die.
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BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#6094
RE: joke time
August 18, 2022 at 5:21 am
Why would a pig dressed in black never get bullied?




Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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Darinda Offline
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#6095
RE: joke time
August 18, 2022 at 11:54 am
“How would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?”

While teaching a class a teacher trying to teach good manners asked her students the following question:

“Michael, if you were on a date having dinner with a nice young lady, how would you tell her that you have to go to the bathroom?”

Michael said: “Just a minute I have to go pee.”

The teacher responded by saying: “That would be rude and impolite. What about you Sherman, how would you say it?”

Sherman said: “I am sorry, but I really need to go to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”
“That’s better, but it’s still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table. And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?”

Johnny said: “I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, who I hope to introduce you to after dinner.”
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#6096
RE: joke time
August 19, 2022 at 10:58 pm
Little Billy runs home crying.

Mother, "Why are you crying, Billy?"

Billy, "The priest just washed out my mouth with soap!"

Mother, "Did you say a bad word?"

Billy, "No, he said it was to get rid of his DNA!"
Dying to live, living to die.
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#6097
RE: joke time
August 19, 2022 at 11:05 pm
Her, "I'm pregnant."

Him "Hi, pregnant. I'm dad!"

Her, "No, you're not."
Dying to live, living to die.
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The Valkyrie Offline
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#6098
RE: joke time
August 20, 2022 at 8:10 am
Having a healthy sex life helps improve your memory.



Merry Christmas, everyone!
Dying to live, living to die.
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BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#6099
RE: joke time
August 21, 2022 at 4:23 am
Dracula films are never rebooted, just revamped.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#6100
RE: joke time
August 21, 2022 at 11:31 am
‘If Donald Trump hadn’t inherited all that money from his father, what do you think he’d be doing now?’

‘25 to life.’

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

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