joke time

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

‘Where were ye born, Paddy?’

‘ Ireland, Mick.’

‘Which part?’

‘All of me, ye daft bugger.’

*****

‘Ye’ll excuse me pulling ye over, Archbishop. Have ye been drinking at all today?’

‘Only water, Constable, only water.’

‘Then why is it I’m after smelling wine?’

‘Saints preserve us! He’s done it again!’

*****

‘My mate fell off his motorbike.’

‘Did he now?’

‘Aye. Both legs broken and he’s blind in one eye.’

‘No wonder he fell off.’

*****

‘Mr. O’Reilly, I’d like to marry your daughter.’

‘Well, lad, are ye able to support a family?’

‘I am, sir.’

‘Grand. There’s six of us.’

*****

Boru

[The Valkyrie]

The chief difference between New Zealand and Australia is that we shear our sheep and the Aussies don’t share their sheep with anyone.

Boru

You know, this means war, right?

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

The chief difference between New Zealand and Australia is that we shear our sheep and the Aussies don’t share their sheep with anyone.

Boru

You know, this means war, right?

The Great Sheep War Of 2026?

Bring it, bitch!!

Boru

[The Valkyrie]

Father O'Driscoll was walking down a quiet country lane one afternoon when he heard a commotion from the other side of a wall.

Peering over, he sees a pair of leprechauns fighting.

He jumps the wall and separates the two leprechauns.

"For sure and begorrah!" The priest exclaims, "Now, why would two of the little people be fighting?"

"Tell me, father, " says one of the leprechauns, "are there any dwarf nuns in Ireland?"

The priest is surprised, "Dwarf nuns? No, I don't rightly think there are!"

The leprechaun takes a vicious kick at his companion, "see?", he yells. "I told you we was fucking a penguin!!"