The Book of Abiogenesis

[Nintentacle]

Chapter 1:
In the beginning, there was nothing, and then it exploded. And the Earth was hot, and was without life. And lifelessness was upon the face of the Earth. And then the Earth cooled down, and it started raining and raining for many years.

Then, when those many years came to an end, the Earth was filled with the rain and the water was an Ocean Soup. Then Lightning hit this Ocean Soup, and then there was a living Organism.

This Organism was to be the biological father of all mankind; The small and the great, the rich and the poor, the free and the bond, the man and the woman, the logical and the illogical: All.

This Organism would not be discovered by the illogical: Who fight against abortion, believe in God, and love their enemies; But he would be discovered by the ones we call logical, yea, rational: Many of whom see no problem with abortion, do not believe in God, and do not love their enemies.

The irrational and the close-minded are certainly without excuse: For they think they realize that the human mind has but a grain of sand in the Beach to research, and that it is impossible that mankind can discover the absolute truth: They want a nation under God.

But the rational and the free-thinkers shall be great, but certainly not exalted: For many shall be irrational and close-minded, and shall not listen to the great, and, yea, when the rational die they shall exist no longer: For this reason is there no exaltation.

To continue off of what I spoke, this Organism reproduced: Its children reproduced, and their children reproduced: Yea, after a long time, there was a Fish. Then this fish reproduced, and its children, and their children: Thus Land Creatures were born. Then the Land Creatures reproduced, and its children, and their children: Thus Mankind was born. Yea, and Mankind shall reproduce, and their children reproduce, and theirs: Then shall a new kind be born.

When then was such logic and reason exalted on high? Yea, with mankind. For the Organisms, and the Fish, and the Land Creatures were not as Mankind: Mankind is much smarter, which lead to Science, and more knowledge, and more reason. Indeed, you would not be reading this if Mankind was not born from that Organism, which was born from the Earth, which was born from things, and those things things, and those nothing: Therefore the origin of mankind is in nothing, and Abiogenesis.

Although, mankind could not have been born without death: There cannot be nothing no longer, therefore nothing is dead. For this reason can we not comprehend nothingness. What, then? Why cannot we comprehend nothing with Science? The reason for this is because Science is most certainly not always correct: For we can only comprehend so much. We certainly do not understand the 4D, or the Universe, and much more.

Then is it possible for Science to be incorrect on the nothingness, and the Organism? That is certainly so. But indeed the logical ones still believe it because they indeed hate the other option.

[Cyberman]

Genesis 1

Boreded Ceiling Cat makinkgz Urf n stuffs

1 Oh hai. In teh beginnin Ceiling Cat maded teh skiez An da Urfs, but he did not eated dem.

2 Da Urfs no had shapez An haded dark face, An Ceiling Cat rode invisible bike over teh waterz.

3 At start, no has lyte. An Ceiling Cat sayz, i can haz lite? An lite wuz.4 An Ceiling Cat sawed teh lite, to seez stuffs, An splitted teh lite from dark but taht wuz ok cuz kittehs can see in teh dark An not tripz over nethin.5 An Ceiling Cat sayed light Day An dark no Day. It were FURST!!!1

6 An Ceiling Cat sayed, im in ur waterz makin a ceiling. But he no yet make a ur. An he maded a hole in teh Ceiling.7 An Ceiling Cat doed teh skiez with waterz down An waterz up. It happen.8 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has teh firmmint wich iz funny bibel naim 4 ceiling, so wuz teh twoth day.

9 An Ceiling Cat gotted all teh waterz in ur base, An Ceiling Cat hadz dry placez cuz kittehs DO NOT WANT get wet.10 An Ceiling Cat called no waterz urth and waters oshun. Iz good.

11 An Ceiling Cat sayed, DO WANT grass! so tehr wuz seedz An stufs, An fruitzors An vegbatels. An a Corm. It happen.12 An Ceiling Cat sawed that weedz ish good, so, letz there be weedz.13 An so teh threeth day jazzhands.

14 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has lightz in the skiez for splittin day An no day.15 It happen, lights everwear, like christmass, srsly.16 An Ceiling Cat doeth two grate lightz, teh most big for day, teh other for no day.17 An Ceiling Cat screw tehm on skiez, with big nails An stuff, to lite teh Urfs.18 An tehy rulez day An night. Ceiling Cat sawed. Iz good.19 An so teh furth day w00t.

20 An Ceiling Cat sayed, waterz bring me phishes, An burds, so kittehs can eat dem. But Ceiling Cat no eated dem.21 An Ceiling Cat maed big fishies An see monstrs, which wuz like big cows, except they no mood, An other stuffs dat mooves, An Ceiling Cat sawed iz good.22 An Ceiling Cat sed O hai, make bebehs kthx. An dont worry i wont watch u secksy, i not that kynd uf kitteh.23 An so teh...fith day. Ceiling Cat taek a wile 2 cawnt.

24 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has MOAR living stuff, mooes, An creepie tings, An otehr aminals. It happen so tehre.25 An Ceiling Cat doed moar living stuff, mooes, An creepies, An otehr animuls, An did not eated tehm.

26 An Ceiling Cat sayed, letz us do peeps like uz, becuz we ish teh qte, An let min p0wnz0r becuz tehy has can openers.

27 So Ceiling Cat createded teh peeps taht waz like him, can has can openers he maed tehm, min An womin wuz maeded, but he did not eated tehm.

28 An Ceiling Cat sed them O hai maek bebehs kthx, An p0wn teh waterz, no waterz An teh firmmint, An evry stufs.

29 An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, the Urfs, I has it, An I has not eated it.30 For evry createded stufs tehre are the fuudz, to the burdies, teh creepiez, An teh mooes, so tehre. It happen. Iz good.

31 An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, teh good enouf for releaze as version 0.8a. kthxbai.

[robvalue]

Cool! Is he anything to do with creationist cat?