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Whats so offensive about Christianity
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 (December 18, 2014 at 4:10 pm)Stimbo Wrote: Remakes are so passé. We do re-imaginings now. As long as there are no time travelling Romulans . . . Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni: "You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???" 
Hopefully not. Lots of lens flares, though. You got to have lens flares. Lens flares are compulsory.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
RE: Whats so offensive about Christianity
December 18, 2014 at 4:38 pm
(This post was last modified: December 18, 2014 at 4:40 pm by The Valkyrie.)
Jesus can be the rebellious son, who doesn't know his real father and disrespects his living parents.
He's misunderstood, brooding, and has beautiful flowing locks of hair and eventually realizes his true place in the world. Love interest in Mary Magdelene, but is torn by his feelings for Judas, too. And the final rejection of Judas as a love interest is what leads to the betrayal. We can even make Judas sparkly! Instant Hollywood blockbuster. Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni: "You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???" 
They just need to get Jesus to play Jesus.
Needs a talking dog sidekick and a curmudgeonly boss that he can throw his badge at to say he resigns.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
RE: Whats so offensive about Christianity
December 18, 2014 at 4:51 pm
(This post was last modified: December 18, 2014 at 4:51 pm by The Valkyrie.)
(December 18, 2014 at 4:49 pm)Elskidor Wrote: They just need to get Jesus to play Jesus. Won't happen. Apparently his audition for Passion of the Christ was rejected and since then he's completely turned his back on Hollywood. (December 18, 2014 at 4:49 pm)Stimbo Wrote: Needs a talking dog sidekick and a curmudgeonly boss that he can throw his badge at to say he resigns. Who's more curmudgeonly than his "real" dad? Talking snake instead of the talking dog? Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni: "You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
As long as it has Eddie Murphy's voice, either works for me.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
Jesus needs a catchphrase.
"I DAMN you to HELL" might work if there were some special effects of the miscreant being eaten by his own bowels while on fire or something. (December 18, 2014 at 4:56 pm)vorlon13 Wrote: Jesus needs a catchphrase. On the cross: "I'll be back!" Wait, that's Arnie and, unlike Jesus, Arnie DOES come back. Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni: "You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???" 
Oooooh, low blow!
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