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Atheist Forums › Community › Religion v
How can we make adults believe in Santa?

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How can we make adults believe in Santa?
watchamadoodle Offline
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#1
How can we make adults believe in Santa?
March 20, 2015 at 7:40 pm (This post was last modified: March 20, 2015 at 7:46 pm by watchamadoodle.)
I've been wondering why Santa belief disappears but religious belief doesn't. What would we need to do to turn Santa belief into a religion that could compete with Christianity, Islam, etc.?

Here are a few changes that might help:
(1) The real-life gifts on Christmas need to change, because that is too easy to falsify. Either the gifts need to be invisible, or the gifts need to arrive at unpredictable times as random good fortunes. If you have not been naughty, but you still are not receiving gifts, then you simply don't appreciate the gifts that you are getting, and that is very naughty. That explains why you are not getting gifts.
(2) The cookies and milk need to change. Every Christmas Eve, the Santa believers consume a cookie and drink some milk with the assurance that Santa will share this snack with them in spirit.
(3) Santa needs a hell that depends on belief. If you stop believing in Santa, then you will remain on the naughty list until you repent of your unbelief. If you never repent, then you will burn forever in Santa's cookie oven.

Thinking
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Nope Offline
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#2
RE: How can we make adults believe in Santa?
March 20, 2015 at 7:52 pm (This post was last modified: March 20, 2015 at 7:53 pm by Nope.)
There should be some way to feel Santa in your heart.

Lots of things that humans can't help doing like having sexual fantasies or farting should be a considered a sign the person is bad and therefore needs Santa
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c172 Offline
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#3
RE: How can we make adults believe in Santa?
March 20, 2015 at 8:14 pm
Don't believe and your fruitcake will get moldy.
"For me, it is far better to grasp the Universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring." - Carl Sagan
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daver49 Offline
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#4
RE: How can we make adults believe in Santa?
March 20, 2015 at 8:21 pm
(March 20, 2015 at 7:40 pm)watchamadoodle Wrote: I've been wondering why Santa belief disappears but religious belief doesn't. What would we need to do to turn Santa belief into a religion that could compete with Christianity, Islam, etc.?

Become Santa yourself!
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JesusHChrist Offline
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#5
RE: How can we make adults believe in Santa?
March 20, 2015 at 8:27 pm
Eternal torture by elves (or even worse, Elvis) if you don't believe?
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watchamadoodle Offline
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#6
RE: How can we make adults believe in Santa?
March 20, 2015 at 8:31 pm (This post was last modified: March 20, 2015 at 8:38 pm by watchamadoodle.)
How about sacramental use of amanita muscaria?

[Image: 2006-10-25_Amanita_muscaria_crop.jpg]
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BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
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#7
RE: How can we make adults believe in Santa?
March 20, 2015 at 8:32 pm
Tell them there's money in it.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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Exian Offline
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#8
RE: How can we make adults believe in Santa?
March 20, 2015 at 8:36 pm
Have Santa become the answer to why we are here and the promise of where we're going.
I can't remember where this verse is from, I think it got removed from canon:

"I don't hang around with mostly men because I'm gay. It's because men are better than women. Better trained, better equipped...better. Just better! I'm not gay."

For context, this is the previous verse:

"Hi Jesus" -robvalue
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Cato Offline
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#9
RE: How can we make adults believe in Santa?
March 20, 2015 at 8:49 pm
(March 20, 2015 at 8:27 pm)JesusHChrist Wrote: Eternal torture by elves (or even worse, Elvis) if you don't believe?

I recommend Heat Mizer:

[Image: th?&id=HN.608033718825254966&w=300&h=300...9&rs=0&p=0]
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TheRealJoeFish Offline
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#10
RE: How can we make adults believe in Santa?
March 20, 2015 at 9:08 pm


How will we know, when the morning comes, we are still human? - 2D

Don't worry, my friend.  If this be the end, then so shall it be.
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Atheist Forums › Community › Religion v
How can we make adults believe in Santa?

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