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Woman Sues 'All Homosexuals' on Behalf of Jesus
May 6, 2015 at 11:13 am
This is not a joke.
Quote:A Nebraska woman identifying herself as the "ambassador" for plaintiffs "God and His Son, Jesus Christ," is suing all homosexuals on Earth for breaking "religious and moral laws," according to court records filed Tuesday.
In the suit, entered into the docket as Driskell v. Homosexuals, Sylvia Ann Driskell, 66, of Auburn, Nebraska, asks in a seven-page, neatly handwritten petition (PDF) that U.S. District Judge John M. Gerrard decide once and for all whether homosexuality is or isn't a sin.
The suit doesn't cite any case law under which a judge could make such a determination. In fact, it cites no court cases at all, quoting Webster's Dictionary and numerous Bible verses, instead, to bolster Driskell's central contention, which is:
"That homosexuality is a sin and that they the homosexuals know it is a sin to live a life of homosexuality. Why else would they have been hiding in the closet."
Of course, this raises so many questions. Does this woman actually think this a viable legal tactic, or is this one of those "Look at me, Jesus!" things? Who would legally represent every homosexual in existence? And probably the most pressing question of all, why is it that in the good ol' days God would just smite everyone or drown them when they were naughty but now he's lowered to himself to working within our legal system?
I will say one thing for her, however, she has beautiful penmanship.
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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RE: Woman Sues 'All Homosexuals' on Behalf of Jesus
May 6, 2015 at 11:23 am
One reason for hiding their true self is to protect them from people like her, and the laywer in California who wants all homosexuals to be executed.
I can't believe this isn't some kind of Onion article or something. Look lady. The courts are already deciding in favor or equality state by state. It's happening. Get over it.
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RE: Woman Sues 'All Homosexuals' on Behalf of Jesus
May 6, 2015 at 11:23 am
I'm wondering how she thinks any gays living in the middle of the Amazon are aware that it's a sin but ok
Stupid woman.
Would be interesting to dig up her track record to see what rules she has broken
"Adulthood is like looking both ways before you cross the road, and then getting hit by an airplane" - sarcasm_only
"Ironically like the nativist far-Right, which despises multiculturalism, but benefits from its ideas of difference to scapegoat the other and to promote its own white identity politics; these postmodernists, leftists, feminists and liberals also use multiculturalism, to side with the oppressor, by demanding respect and tolerance for oppression characterised as 'difference', no matter how intolerable." - Maryam Namazie
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RE: Woman Sues 'All Homosexuals' on Behalf of Jesus
May 6, 2015 at 11:24 am
What a pussy! MY god told me to straight up murder the fuckers! Clearly he has a bigger dick than that pansy Jesus fella, lawsuit my ass
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RE: Woman Sues 'All Homosexuals' on Behalf of Jesus
May 6, 2015 at 11:24 am
(May 6, 2015 at 11:24 am)Neimenovic Wrote: What a pussy!
I died.
"Adulthood is like looking both ways before you cross the road, and then getting hit by an airplane" - sarcasm_only
"Ironically like the nativist far-Right, which despises multiculturalism, but benefits from its ideas of difference to scapegoat the other and to promote its own white identity politics; these postmodernists, leftists, feminists and liberals also use multiculturalism, to side with the oppressor, by demanding respect and tolerance for oppression characterised as 'difference', no matter how intolerable." - Maryam Namazie
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RE: Woman Sues 'All Homosexuals' on Behalf of Jesus
May 6, 2015 at 11:31 am
(May 6, 2015 at 11:23 am)Yeauxleaux Wrote: I'm wondering how she thinks any gays living in the middle of the Amazon are aware that it's a sin but ok
Stupid woman.
Would be interesting to dig up her track record to see what rules she has broken
Well, that brings up another issue. Apparently, one of her justifications is Leviticus, and we all know there's a ton of forbidden shit in there that she's just picking and choosing from. How come she's not suing Red Lobster for serving shellfish?
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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RE: Woman Sues 'All Homosexuals' on Behalf of Jesus
May 6, 2015 at 11:41 am
Someone needs a vibrator -- STAT!
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RE: Woman Sues 'All Homosexuals' on Behalf of Jesus
May 6, 2015 at 11:45 am
(This post was last modified: May 6, 2015 at 1:11 pm by Anomalocaris.)
let God himself show how seriously he takes the bible this cunt venerates by swearing upon it and taking the witness stand.
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RE: Woman Sues 'All Homosexuals' on Behalf of Jesus
May 6, 2015 at 11:45 am
You would think Jesus and Friends, being a godly MegaCorp, would have a sufficiently competent legal team to litigate on Jesus' own behalf.
If that was what Jesus really wanted of course.
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RE: Woman Sues 'All Homosexuals' on Behalf of Jesus
May 6, 2015 at 11:49 am
Little does she understand, she is actually an ambassador to liberals by helping our cause through demonstrating what batshit-insane lunatics her side is.
Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.
Albert Einstein
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