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(July 12, 2015 at 3:13 pm)IATIA Wrote: I generally treat all as a neutral gender entity and the non-PC male chauvinistic pig in me most always refers to him, he, them, they, mankind, chairman, whatever. Too old to change or give a shit.
We forgive you.... I guess....
"Of course, everyone will claim they respect someone who tries to speak the truth, but in reality, this is a rare quality. Most respect those who speak truths they agree with, and their respect for the speaking only extends as far as their realm of personal agreement. It is less common, almost to the point of becoming a saintly virtue, that someone truly respects and loves the truth seeker, even when their conclusions differ wildly."
(July 12, 2015 at 2:27 pm)Pyrrho Wrote: I am not exactly suggesting that you do use a gender neutral name. I am merely presenting it as an option for you to consider. If you tire of dealing with sexist jerks, it is an option available to you for online communication. Unfortunately, most sites (including this one) forbid multiple accounts, so you would have to start out that way on a site if you are going to follow the rules.
Also, you do not have to lie to do this. You just don't reveal that information to people. You may regard it as personal information that is no one's business, just like your real name, social security number, etc. Not telling us your social security number does not require any lies, and not telling us your sex does not require any lies. That was the way my wife did it, as people just assumed she was a man.
And if I am ever disrespectful to you, it will not be because you are a woman.
(Besides, I do not know that you are a woman. You might be a guy just messing with us. )
Yes, very true. It's definitely a viable option, and one I would suggest someone take if they cared more about being treated objectively on the internet. If I get to that point (which I doubt I will, but anything is possible), I will definitely consider doing this in the future.
Thanks again!
LOL! The numerous people here who have become my friend on facebook can attest to the fact that I am 100% who I say I am!
You are welcome.
People can and do make phony facebook pages. Some people create more than one for different purposes. It is easy enough to do, and you can find (or take) pictures to put up and say they are of you. So a facebook page is not proof of sex. Maybe you are just more thorough than some others are, in your charade. It makes it more fun that way, to thoroughly convince people of it!
Basically, I don't care whether you are really male or female, as my interaction with you is through my computer. It just does not make any real difference to me. Frankly, it would make little difference if we met in real life. You are married and I am married, and I don't think either of us is looking for something on the side. So what difference would it make what sex the other person is?
"A wise man ... proportions his belief to the evidence."
— David Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, Section X, Part I.
Yes, very true. It's definitely a viable option, and one I would suggest someone take if they cared more about being treated objectively on the internet. If I get to that point (which I doubt I will, but anything is possible), I will definitely consider doing this in the future.
Thanks again!
LOL! The numerous people here who have become my friend on facebook can attest to the fact that I am 100% who I say I am!
You are welcome.
People can and do make phony facebook pages. Some people create more than one for different purposes. It is easy enough to do, and you can find (or take) pictures to put up and say they are of you. So a facebook page is not proof of sex. Maybe you are just more thorough than some others are, in your charade. It makes it more fun that way, to thoroughly convince people of it!
Basically, I don't care whether you are really male or female, as my interaction with you is through my computer. It just does not make any real difference to me. Frankly, it would make little difference if we met in real life. You are married and I am married, and I don't think either of us is looking for something on the side. So what difference would it make what sex the other person is?
For me, it's just about the principle of being open and honest about who I am. It has nothing to do with looking for something on the side or anything like that.
If you want to connect on facebook, let me know and I'll send you my info!
"Of course, everyone will claim they respect someone who tries to speak the truth, but in reality, this is a rare quality. Most respect those who speak truths they agree with, and their respect for the speaking only extends as far as their realm of personal agreement. It is less common, almost to the point of becoming a saintly virtue, that someone truly respects and loves the truth seeker, even when their conclusions differ wildly."
(July 12, 2015 at 4:13 pm)Pyrrho Wrote: You are welcome.
People can and do make phony facebook pages. Some people create more than one for different purposes. It is easy enough to do, and you can find (or take) pictures to put up and say they are of you. So a facebook page is not proof of sex. Maybe you are just more thorough than some others are, in your charade. It makes it more fun that way, to thoroughly convince people of it!
Basically, I don't care whether you are really male or female, as my interaction with you is through my computer. It just does not make any real difference to me. Frankly, it would make little difference if we met in real life. You are married and I am married, and I don't think either of us is looking for something on the side. So what difference would it make what sex the other person is?
For me, it's just about the principle of being open and honest about who I am. It has nothing to do with looking for something on the side or anything like that.
If you want to connect on facebook, let me know and I'll send you my info!
I am not on facebook.
"A wise man ... proportions his belief to the evidence."
— David Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, Section X, Part I.
(July 12, 2015 at 3:06 pm)rexbeccarox Wrote: Yeah... it's a little late for me to change my identity after almost three years here and being staff. I do notice I'm treated differently than other staff members at times; it might just be correlation, but maybe not.
You have the same sort of situation of a black person being treated differently. It may be an instance of bigotry, or, on some occasions, there might be some other cause, due to something specific about you. But I think it is safe to say that some of the difference in treatment you get is because you are identified as female. Probably most of it.
You have just given me an idea. If I were wanting to be a moderator at some site, I think it would be good to create a female online persona and then come down harder on the assholes who are sexist jerks. Of course, it would be making extra work for oneself, as there are plenty of sexist jerks in the world. I certainly would not object if you did that here, though as it is not my site, my opinion counts for nothing on such matters.
"A wise man ... proportions his belief to the evidence."
— David Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, Section X, Part I.
July 12, 2015 at 10:21 pm (This post was last modified: July 12, 2015 at 10:23 pm by rexbeccarox.
Edit Reason: clarification
)
I mean, I calls it as I sees it. I generally make a (non staff) case when I see blatant bigotry of any kind. It's just not always obvious when you're the one who it's against, and I wouldn't doubt that my personality has at least something to do with the way people regard me here. I'm one of those love-her-or-hate-her people, I think.
Sexism isn't against the rules here, and I'm glad it's not; I hate taking action on free speech, and it's nice to know someone's views up-front so you can decide how you'd like to communicate with them. or whether they're worth your time.
Not that my opinion matters, but I think that, by far, most of the crap that we are discussing is due to people being sexist assholes. I would not say that you are a love-her-or-hate-her sort of person, and, not really knowing you, I would not say that I love you. But I CERTAINLY do not hate you.
When people treat you differently (and by that, it is almost always badly), you can pretty well be sure that the person is a fucking sexist asshole. If my opinion mattered, I would ask you to come down harder on those sexist assholes.
So, in short, when people are mean to you, I do not think it is generally a clash of personalities. It may be in some cases, but most of the time, I am confident that you are dealing with a shit for brains sexist asshole.
"A wise man ... proportions his belief to the evidence."
— David Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, Section X, Part I.
July 12, 2015 at 11:27 pm (This post was last modified: July 12, 2015 at 11:37 pm by Excited Penguin.)
(July 12, 2015 at 1:10 pm)Pyrrho Wrote:
(July 12, 2015 at 1:37 am)Catholic_Lady Wrote: ... treat the women on the forum with particularly less respect than the men...
That sort of thing is unfortunately common. It is unfortunate that there is no simple, easy fix to stop people from being prejudiced. Stupid bigots are stupid, so it is hard to get them to see reason.
To avoid it online for oneself, one can select a gender neutral name (or one associated with males) and never post a picture of oneself and never say that one is female. For men who want to observe the difference, they can join a forum with a feminine name and never say they are male, and see how they are treated over time.
Long ago, my wife communicated on computer message boards, and used a gender neutral name. She noticed very different treatment than what happened in real life, as she was treated just like an adult man on the message boards. She was an underage girl at the time. But she could hold her own in conversations with adult men, and they had no idea who they were communicating with.
I don't really like what you're implying here. I am not sexist for one, but a crazy paranoid person could treat me like one nonetheless, all I have to do is not agree with them and say why. I do the same thing with guys. Does that make me a misanthrope instead of a sexist person? No, it simply makes me human. I am not any meaner to girls than I am to boys, seeing how I am quite the effeminate man myself, and have no respect for any kind of machismo. In fact, it makes me gag wherever I see it. So yeah, it's pretty much bullshit to call me sexist, but whatever - deluded people never learn. I especially hate it when people get an idea in their heads and use it whenever anything resembling the stereotype at all comes up in one's arguing. -- But then again, I can't really do anything about that. People will always feel the need to make excuses for playing the victim card. Honestly, it's disgraceful and stupid. There are real cases of sexism out there.
It would seem one can't disagree with a woman anymore, or pay her a simple compliment, as youngsters tend to do, without being called a sexist. This is mere paranoia, and I'm glad I never fell for it.
There are a lot of small girls I know and respect. There are girls I met that are by far more intelligent than I am. I can't say the same thing about guys I know.
Cathy and Becca, here, are no such thing. I can't call them smart just because they would call me sexist otherwise. I tell it how I see it. If they appeared more intelligent to me than they do, I would have said it outright. They do not, though.
It's pathetic to milk respect like that. You will never earn my respect by appealing to my political correctness. All you will do is make me wonder about what type of person you really are- and what I'd come up with wouldn't be very flattering.