Atheism: Don't Become a Tree After Death

[Shell B]

It's supposed to be depressing.

I know. What's more depressing is that most people don't even think twice about it.

[Oldandeasilyconfused]

Until I was 50 I wanted to come back as a ladies' bicycle seat. Today I've decided I'm not going.


What to say when an atheist sneezes:

"Allergy or cold?"

If an allergy: (sympathetically) " I have 'em too,they suck don't they"

If a cold: "Get away from me!"

[Minimalist]

Far more practical, Pad!

[Shell B]

You have to admit, it was a pretty lame joke. I'm assuming that the intended meaning behind saying god bless you in response to a sneeze is a wish that someone will get better soon. If you give a crap about the sneezer, just say "I hope you feel better." or "Are you sick?" How the fuck "Nothing happens when you die." is funny, I don't know. It would be, if the intention of saying god bless you in response to a sneeze was to convey that the person was going to heaven or hell when they die. It's not, so, Dane Cook, you fail. /rant

[Tiberius]

I've never found one of Dane Cook's jokes even remotely funny.

[Violet]

I thought it was great until

Johnny weeping willow over here..
I wanted to slam this guy so bad for this right. But then I stopped. I stopped you guys please hear me out. I let it sink in and I want you guys to as well.
I hope when he dies he does become a tree. I hope he's in the middle of the wilderness and he's doing his tree thing. Whatever it is trees do. I know they do alot of work with breezes. And wouldn't it be fantastic if while he was out there just enjoying his treeness. Through the woods a huge, sweaty guy with an axe comes along. Sees him. Chops him down. Smash. Put a chain around him. Drah him through the mud and the muck. Put him into a sawmill. Grind him up. Then you pound him down into paper. And once he's paper. You print the Bible on him.

He needs to work on the ending Should have mocked sneezer's belief in a "me", but no: he wastes his joke with a tree.

---

I've never found one of Dane Cook's jokes even remotely funny.

I thought he was pretty good until the end

[The_Flying_Skeptic]

he's trying to appeal to theists. the whole point of the joke is to ridicule atheists

[Xyster]

Lol he is just another cherry picking Theist.... umm im pretty sure its not the Christians who believe in reincarnation...IDIOT... Oh well I guess its too much to ask that one know thier own religion.

[Violet]

he's trying to appeal to theists. the whole point of the joke is to ridicule atheists

Ahh... well it isn't much of a joke from that angle

I found the parts about the sneezing guy to be funny

[tavarish]

Fun fact - I was there when he made that joke. I was at that recording.