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Current time: January 1, 2025, 5:29 am
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So I asked a guy out on a date...
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 (April 30, 2016 at 8:03 am)SteelCurtain Wrote: ...completely on accident. Sorry for the click-bait!! I feel bad for him because I know that had to have been horrifying and embarrassing. You, MCB, are absolutely adorable. I accidentally do this to people all the time. I have no idea what to say you should except continue on being friends with him and hanging out with him (probably in groups outside of studying so he doesn't think you're leading him on or something) as if it never happened. You could ask him if he wants to talk about it or just forget about it. There's not a lot you can do that won't be awkward but just try to make it obvi that nothing has changed. I don't know how it is for you or in the specific situation, but I seriously do this to people a lot. I've tried to pay better attention to stop it from happening but I'm apparently incapable of telling the difference between friendship behavior vs flirting. 
I don't end up in this situation too often. Generally, I am super over the top sensitive to being a testosterony man and staring and saying objectifying things to women that I don't know, so I don't send signals to women that are normal, I'd guess. Most women think I'm gay. I flirt intellectually, I am never going to be the guy that goes into a bar and picks up women, partly because that's not my personality, and partly because the very idea of 'picking up' women sounds terrible and a little grocery store aisle to me. (I was a terrible man whore in college, so this didn't always apply.)
As an adult, I generally date people I've known for a while, and that has meant that I don't date a lot. After Alex and I separated, I haven't dated at all. (Mostly because I am busy 18 hours a day and sleeping the other 6, partially because I'm still a bit hung up on her.) But with guys, I haven't ever even had that kind of relationship on my radar. So I didn't expect it, nor was I thinking it was a possibility. As an update, I talked to him after the final, and he said he wanted to still be friends, but he needed a little distance. More because he was embarrassed, I'd guess. I told him I'm here for him as a friend whenever, and when school starts up in the fall, to text me or call me (apparently the kids don't do Facebook anymore.) And we'll have lunch in the student center.
"There remain four irreducible objections to religious faith: that it wholly misrepresents the origins of man and the cosmos, that because of this original error it manages to combine the maximum servility with the maximum of solipsism, that it is both the result and the cause of dangerous sexual repression, and that it is ultimately grounded on wish-thinking." ~Christopher Hitchens, god is not Great
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The question is, did he put out?
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni: "You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
I don't even go to bars. It's not my scene. I like family places that serve alcohol on a limit. And I like fancy lunch places with bars. I don't like actual bars or clubs. I only end up in those places out of coercion and I usually spend the whole time trying to will myself to be invisible.
(May 8, 2016 at 11:28 pm)Losty Wrote: I don't even go to bars. It's not my scene. I like family places that serve alcohol on a limit. And I like fancy lunch places with bars. I don't like actual bars or clubs. I only end up in those places out of coercion and I usually spend the whole time trying to will myself to be invisible. How am I supposed to drug you if you're not in a bar? 
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni: "You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???" (May 8, 2016 at 11:30 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote:(May 8, 2016 at 11:28 pm)Losty Wrote: I don't even go to bars. It's not my scene. I like family places that serve alcohol on a limit. And I like fancy lunch places with bars. I don't like actual bars or clubs. I only end up in those places out of coercion and I usually spend the whole time trying to will myself to be invisible. Just say you're gonna drug me and I'll comply 
It's been too long since I last went to a nightclub. I'm rarely in the mood these days but I've fancied it since my birthday
Waiting for my friend to get back from Brazil then we're gonna hit London again, I can't wait -Dogface
"Adulthood is like looking both ways before you cross the road, and then getting hit by an airplane" - sarcasm_only
"Ironically like the nativist far-Right, which despises multiculturalism, but benefits from its ideas of difference to scapegoat the other and to promote its own white identity politics; these postmodernists, leftists, feminists and liberals also use multiculturalism, to side with the oppressor, by demanding respect and tolerance for oppression characterised as 'difference', no matter how intolerable." - Maryam Namazie  RE: So I asked a guy out on a date...
May 9, 2016 at 12:19 am
(This post was last modified: May 9, 2016 at 12:20 am by Edwardo Piet.)
(May 8, 2016 at 11:33 pm)Losty Wrote:(May 8, 2016 at 11:30 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: How am I supposed to drug you if you're not in a bar? Would it be ever so slightly on the extremely fucking perverted side if I watched? * Edwardo Piet pokes his eyes out of his gratuitously mayo-stained turtle shell chanting "Do it. Do it. Do it." -Hammy (May 9, 2016 at 12:19 am)Alasdair Ham Wrote:(May 8, 2016 at 11:33 pm)Losty Wrote: Just say you're gonna drug me and I'll comply Yes. Don't make me vivisect you! Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni: "You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???" |
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