I want to talk about keeping positive

[EruptedCarcassBloat]

This is probably a really broad topic, but I was thinking about how when you're arguing with people, often times they can drag you down to their level. I wonder if the same applies also for your mood. Because I think that a lot of times how I feel during the day depends a lot on external factors influencing how I feel.

I guess the easiest solution to this problem would just be to avoid things that could possibly give you negative feelings. I don't think that's really a good solution though, I think it would be nice to know of some sort of actual method of keeping your head above the water in terms of controlling how you feel when it comes to just dealing with every day external stimuli effecting how you feel.

It seems very hard to control your own emotions. If something makes me upset, sometimes I am able to just choose something different to focus on to take my mind off the thing that's making me upset. But then other times it's extremely difficult to get off the negative thoughts, and I just get caught in a vortex which I guess leads to depressed moods.

[Shell B]

Have you tried mindfulness?

[EruptedCarcassBloat]

Have you tried mindfulness?

I guess I try somewhat, with the whole shifting consciously to a different, less frustrating though. Idk much about meditation though.

[LastPoet]

I am one that struggles with my temper. Lets just say that I am vicious when people rub me the wrong way. Dunno about meditation, aint nobody got time for dat, but I have been making progress. My therapist has taught me to breathe properly during confrontation and that helps me regain control over my emotions.

Hope that helps.

[Whateverist]

I am one that struggles with my temper. Lets just say that I am vicious when people rub me the wrong way. Dunno about meditation, aint nobody got time for dat, but I have been making progress. My therapist has taught me to breathe properly during confrontation and that helps me regain control over my emotions.

Hope that helps.

Similarly I have been advised to exercise patience.  Great!  One more thing to work into an already too busy schedule.

[Shell B]

So, mindfulness isn't about redirecting your thoughts to something more calm. It's about being in the moment, not getting wrapped up in some past or future experience, but just existing in the now. It sounds like poppycock, but it's actually pretty cool in practice. It's not always successful, but it's a good tool to have if you tend to get emotional. I suggest reading about how to practice and giving it a shot. You don't have to meditate to practice mindfulness. You can do it while you're driving, eating, watching television or working out. You can also practice mindfulness meditation, and you only need to for a few minutes, really. It's not like you have to sit all day on a mountain top contemplating the universe to get a better grasp of your temper.

[Faith No More]

Mindfulness certainly isn't easy, but I'm getting better at it.

The trick I use to make me stay positive is reminding myself how much worse things could be, like being a child in Aleppo or a parent trying to help a sick child in Venezuela. It helps me appreciate what I have and motivates to get me through the day. It helps me focus on the things I do have as opposed to the things I don't.

There are things you can do to elevate your mood, which in turn will help you stay positive, like exercise and social interaction. They help release the neurochemicals that contribute to positive mental health.

[Shell B]

Mindfulness certainly isn't easy, but I'm getting better at it.

The trick I use to make me stay positive is reminding myself how much worse things could be, like being a child in Aleppo or a parent trying to help a sick child in Venezuela.  It helps me appreciate what I have and motivates to get me through the day.  It helps me focus on the things I do have as opposed to the things I don't.

There are things you can do to elevate your mood, which in turn will help you stay positive, like exercise and social interaction.  They help release the neurochemicals that contribute to positive mental health.

No, it's not easy, especially if you have panic, depression or other high emotional states. I'm not very good at it yet, either, but I think it's a pretty awesome concept.

I also do the comparing thing. In fact, my therapist said it was a good thing because I mentioned that I was feeling bad about looking at people and thinking "at least it's not that bad." I felt like I was being mean to them.

[Faith No More]

No, it's not easy, especially if you have panic, depression or other high emotional states. I'm not very good at it yet, either, but I think it's a pretty awesome concept.

I also do the comparing thing. In fact, my therapist said it was a good thing because I mentioned that I was feeling bad about looking at people and thinking "at least it's not that bad." I felt like I was being mean to them.

I know what you mean. I used to compare myself others like that, and it made me feel terrible. I felt like my life was worthless if I wasn't doing something to help people that were worse off than me, but I realized that was having a negative effect on my mental health. I finally had to accept that the world is such a clusterfuck that you can't save everyone, and you have to focus on the things within reach instead of holding yourself to some sort of idealistic, unattainable standard.

It's just a terrible fact that part of coping with life is accepting that much of the world is a giant shithole.

[Kernel Sohcahtoa]

It seems very hard to control your own emotions. If something makes me upset, sometimes I am able to just choose something different to focus on to take my mind off the thing that's making me upset. But then other times it's extremely difficult to get off the negative thoughts, and I just get caught in a vortex which I guess leads to depressed moods.

Thank you for creating such a wonderful topic, EruptedCarcassBloat.  For me, when I experience negative emotions, I find that the best thing to do is to acknowledge them.  By acknowledging negative emotions, it validates them and allows me to think about why I am upset; rather than immediately acting on them.  Thus, this approach allows me to trace my negative emotions back to some story I had told myself, which then caused me to experience the negative emotion.  Hence, by resolving inner conflict and negative emotions in this way, it has allowed me to improve my ability to tell more constructive stories, which leads to less conflicting emotions and more positive/constructive behavior on my part, especially when I am in conflict with myself or others.