looking at toilet paper after wiping

[KUSA]

There are even mucus glands around your anus, and if everything works properly, you don't even need to wipe.

Or use KY jelly.

[Fireball]

Curiously, in the National Lampoon classic short story, My Vagina, the protagonist did, in fact, put a tampon up his butt.  And one in his vagina.

Is that the same issue with a story where a girl grew a dick? It was in the late '70s (I think) when I read that story. I recall that the story was entitled "My Dick", but it's been quite awhile, so my recollection could be wrong.

---

There are even mucus glands around your anus, and if everything works properly, you don't even need to wipe.

Or use KY jelly.

For what?

[Mystical]

Wait are u saying it's possible to put a tampon up your butt? Like.. that would be helpful to know for someone with an uncontrolled case of Chrones and the shitz!

---

I showed a doctor my wipe before. As there was tons of blood and she insisted without testing that I was fine. Do you know what? Poop diseases are the worst. Diseases of anything having to do with your digestive system.

Because it never stops. It's always going. And you can't live without using it! Well u can but that is just a horrific way to live believe me.

My Chrones Treatment #5 failed, btw. I am semi worried they'll run out of treatments for me to try and I'll just.. live till some weird Chrones or Ulcerative Colitis or Wegeners complication just takes me out. Talk about a shitty disease--can't absorb nutrients, inflammation makes weird things happen to your skin like pyoderma gangrenenosum, fissures, fistulas (don't look up if u value your sanity), ulcers, boils, rectal tears, hemhorroids, stomach ulcers, ulcerative collitis, and then since the treatment for this is several immunosuppressants (low dose chemo)?.... Infection. Or pulmonary embolisms, of which I've had 3. Three surgeries and being bedbound after each one for weeks degrades your muscles, and can cause clots in your legs to travel to lungs. Blood thinners for that making all of the above life threatening (well, more so).
I read about a treatment that works like 95% of the time. It's called a fecal transplant, and it's as gross as it sounds, yeah. Would you do it?

---

[vorlon13]

There were 2 stories.

One, My Penis, where a girl woke up one morning with a penis and her 'adventures' with it. She had sex with a girlfriend since she had a penis it was no longer 'gay' for her to do so, and she was plagued with inconvenient erections all day. She eventually forced her boyfriend to give her a blow job which apparently was much fun for her, but not so much for him as he then beat up his aunt and wound up in reform school.

The other, My Vagina, was about a teenage boy who woke up one morning with his penis absent and a vagina in it's place. He had problems with his immediate menstruation, incredible and intense urge to masturbate all day, and eventual rape by several of his buddies resulting in an unwanted pregnancy he had to have aborted.


I realize all that sounds terribly un-PC, but both stories were incredibly funny.

[ignoramus]

Guys, serious question. You know those countries which don't culturally use TP. What do they do? Look at their hand? ...

[Whateverist]

I showed a doctor my wipe before. As there was tons of blood and she insisted without testing that I was fine. Do you know what? Poop diseases are the worst. Diseases of anything having to do with your digestive system.

Because it never stops. It's always going. And you can't live without using it! Well u can but that is just a horrific way to live believe me.

My Chrones Treatment #5 failed, btw. I am semi worried they'll run out of treatments for me to try and I'll just.. live till some weird Chrones or Ulcerative Colitis or Wegeners complication just takes me out. Talk about a shitty disease--can't absorb nutrients, inflammation makes weird things happen to your skin like pyoderma gangrenenosum, fissures, fistulas (don't look up if u value your sanity), ulcers, boils, rectal tears, hemhorroids, stomach ulcers, ulcerative collitis, and then since the treatment for this is several immunosuppressants (low dose chemo)?.... Infection. Or pulmonary embolisms, of which I've had 3. Three surgeries and being bedbound after each one for weeks degrades your muscles, and can cause clots in your legs to travel to lungs. Blood thinners for that making all of the above life threatening (well, more so).
I read about a treatment that works like 95% of the time. It's called a fecal transplant, and it's as gross as it sounds, yeah. Would you do it?

You're damned right I would. Wouldn't need to sleep on it either. Just hand me the shit shake and lets fix this. Can you get this treatment through your doctors? If not, get better ones please! I so prefer happy endings.

[LastPoet]

How about the 3 little shells from demolition man?

[vorlon13]

Wait are u saying it's possible to put a tampon up your butt? Like.. that would be helpful to know for someone with an uncontrolled case of Chrones and the shitz!

---

I showed a doctor my wipe before. As there was tons of blood and she insisted without testing that I was fine. Do you know what? Poop diseases are the worst. Diseases of anything having to do with your digestive system.

Because it never stops. It's always going. And you can't live without using it! Well u can but that is just a horrific way to live believe me.

My Chrones Treatment #5 failed, btw. I am semi worried they'll run out of treatments for me to try and I'll just.. live till some weird Chrones or Ulcerative Colitis or Wegeners complication just takes me out. Talk about a shitty disease--can't absorb nutrients, inflammation makes weird things happen to your skin like pyoderma gangrenenosum, fissures, fistulas (don't look up if u value your sanity), ulcers, boils, rectal tears, hemhorroids, stomach ulcers, ulcerative collitis, and then since the treatment for this is several immunosuppressants (low dose chemo)?.... Infection. Or pulmonary embolisms, of which I've had 3. Three surgeries and being bedbound after each one for weeks degrades your muscles, and can cause clots in your legs to travel to lungs. Blood thinners for that making all of the above life threatening (well, more so).
I read about a treatment that works like 95% of the time. It's called a fecal transplant, and it's as gross as it sounds, yeah. Would you do it?

---

[KUSA]

Curiously, in the National Lampoon classic short story, My Vagina, the protagonist did, in fact, put a tampon up his butt.  And one in his vagina.

Is that the same issue with a story where a girl grew a dick? It was in the late '70s (I think) when I read that story. I recall that the story was entitled "My Dick", but it's been quite awhile, so my recollection could be wrong.

---

Or use KY jelly.

For what?

Butt sex.

[vorlon13]

Is that the same issue with a story where a girl grew a dick? It was in the late '70s (I think) when I read that story. I recall that the story was entitled "My Dick", but it's been quite awhile, so my recollection could be wrong.

---

For what?

Butt sex.