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Dumbest Thing Some Has Every Said To You
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Dumbest question ever, asked of my wife. She had our three sons, aged 5, 3 and 1 with her on the way to taking the 5 year old to school. This gal asks, "They all look alike- are they triplets?" My wife told her, "Yes, they're just different ages." The gal says, "Oh, OK."
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
 (August 27, 2017 at 11:21 am)Fireball Wrote: Dumbest question ever, asked of my wife. She had our three sons, aged 5, 3 and 1 with her on the way to taking the 5 year old to school. This gal asks, "They all look alike- are they triplets?" My wife told her, "Yes, they're just different ages." The gal says, "Oh, OK." That's kind of funny. I know siblings who look very much alike. Though I also have two cousins who look a bit alike too. Genetics can be funny.
Poe's Law: "Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won't mistake for the real thing."
10 Christ-like figures that predate Jesus. Link shortened to Chris ate Jesus for some reason... http://listverse.com/2009/04/13/10-chris...ate-jesus/ Good video to watch, if you want to know how common the Jesus story really is. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88GTUXvp-50 A list of biblical contradictions from the infallible word of Yahweh. http://infidels.org/library/modern/jim_m...tions.html 
"PlayStation 1 is a con, you can't even play PlayStation 3 games on them. My mate put a powerful laser in his though so now his can."
That was just a few years ago from someone in his 20s who I worked with. "If evolution is true why don't we have scorpion tails" On an Islamic forum, the person asking it could have just been really young. Are you ready for the fire? We are firemen. WE ARE FIREMEN! The heat doesn’t bother us. We live in the heat. We train in the heat. It tells us that we’re ready, we’re at home, we’re where we’re supposed to be. Flames don’t intimidate us. What do we do? We control the flame. We control them. We move the flames where we want to. And then we extinguish them. Impersonation is treason. 
I was working graveyard shift at a gas station food mart several years ago and a strung-out junkie came in and asked, "Can I use food stamps to buy methadone?"
Religions were invented to impress and dupe illiterate, superstitious stone-age peasants. So in this modern, enlightened age of information, what's your excuse? Or are you saying with all your advantages, you were still tricked as easily as those early humans?
--- There is no better way to convey the least amount of information in the greatest amount of words than to try explaining your religious views. 
I used to keep aquariums. One day I was at a pet store buying fish on a cold winter day. As the check out woman was looking at a couple bags I had with fish in them, this exchange happened:
Clerk: "Did you bring any towels to wrap these with?" Me: "No, I didn't." Clerk: "Oh, they should be ok. Plastic generates heat." Me: "Excuse me?" Clerk: "Yeah. Like sometimes when I'm getting my hair done they wrap plastic around my head and it gets really warm." Me: "..."
Everything I needed to know about life I learned on Dagobah.
RE: Dumbest Thing Some Has Every Said To You
August 27, 2017 at 1:11 pm
(This post was last modified: August 27, 2017 at 1:12 pm by Fireball.)
(August 27, 2017 at 12:05 pm)Rahul Wrote: I used to keep aquariums. One day I was at a pet store buying fish on a cold winter day. As the check out woman was looking at a couple bags I had with fish in them, this exchange happened: I have an esprit d'escalier for you- next time, just tell her she's a really bright bulb. (August 27, 2017 at 11:30 am)Chad32 Wrote:(August 27, 2017 at 11:21 am)Fireball Wrote: Dumbest question ever, asked of my wife. She had our three sons, aged 5, 3 and 1 with her on the way to taking the 5 year old to school. This gal asks, "They all look alike- are they triplets?" My wife told her, "Yes, they're just different ages." The gal says, "Oh, OK." I'd expect my children to look very much alike, and they do. Same mother and father in all three cases.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
 (August 27, 2017 at 11:14 am)Thumpalumpacus Wrote:(August 27, 2017 at 10:09 am)Thena323 Wrote: Oh, dear. So many dumb things I've heard. Like.... Thanks to this thread I now identify as a klondyke. Thank you all.  RE: Dumbest Thing Some Has Every Said To You
August 27, 2017 at 2:47 pm
(This post was last modified: August 27, 2017 at 2:49 pm by Mermaid.)
"Girls shouldn't go to college, I don't believe in it. You will be wasting time and money because you will just end up getting married and having kids, and you would be taking a college seat away from a boy".
Or, while working on a dairy farm that had frequent pubic visitors, a woman with a child on her hip asked why all the milk cows were female.
If The Flintstones have taught us anything, it's that pelicans can be used to mix cement.
-Homer Simpson (August 27, 2017 at 1:11 pm)Fireball Wrote:(August 27, 2017 at 12:05 pm)Rahul Wrote: I used to keep aquariums. One day I was at a pet store buying fish on a cold winter day. As the check out woman was looking at a couple bags I had with fish in them, this exchange happened: Yeah, but most siblings don't look like identical twins when you line their pictures up.
Poe's Law: "Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won't mistake for the real thing."
10 Christ-like figures that predate Jesus. Link shortened to Chris ate Jesus for some reason... http://listverse.com/2009/04/13/10-chris...ate-jesus/ Good video to watch, if you want to know how common the Jesus story really is. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=88GTUXvp-50 A list of biblical contradictions from the infallible word of Yahweh. http://infidels.org/library/modern/jim_m...tions.html 
Actually said to the mum of an ex-friend of mine: "How much were crisps when you were alive?"
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
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