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2 pieces of advice for future parents
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 (October 13, 2017 at 12:17 pm)Court Jester Wrote: 1. Home school Lol see I would suggest the opposite. Don't homeschool your kid unless the public school is just THAT bad. In the end it's parents' choice. 
“What screws us up the most in life is the picture in our head of what it's supposed to be.”
Also if your signature makes my scrolling mess up "you're tacky and I hate you."  (October 13, 2017 at 12:44 pm)J a c k Wrote: 1. About the person you’re making the baby with: make sure you love them, respect them, and have compatibility. Hate, fighting and disagreements on every parenting issue is no way to raise a child. Study the person first. Do your research. Ask tons of questions. What about their extended family? How will they be involved? What about religion in your child’s life? Education? Discipline? Sports? If you disagree on everything, chances are your child will pay the price. I really like this advice "What about their extended family" I think that's solid advice, sometime when people fall head over heels for someone they often forget they're going to be interacting with their partner's family a lot, so sometimes going with the flow and having only the partner in the frame they can forget about the different family people that won't be out of the picture so it's better to know everyone beforehand so that there won't be any issues down the road  
1. Be patient. With the child. With your spouse. With yourself.
2. Be compassionate. With the child. With your spouse. With yourself.
“Eternity is a terrible thought. I mean, where's it going to end?”
― Tom Stoppard, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead  (October 13, 2017 at 1:59 pm)mlmooney89 Wrote:(October 13, 2017 at 12:17 pm)Court Jester Wrote: 1. Home school Well so is abortion, and there would be no need for this thread. We've home schooled our kids mostly. Some public schools have been okay, but I feel like some just teach for the tests. Just not cracked up with it. Just a personal choice though. My kids do have some friends in public schools and some of them are pretty damn sharp, upstanding teenagers. So it's not all bad, though I would suspect that the majority of that comes from the home rather than the school. 
My advice?
#1. Encourage your kids, and take interest in what they do. Note that I say take interest in what they do, not get them to do what interests you. Too many parents discourage their kids from being what they want to be--and unless they want to be a serial killer, bank robber, or a Republican when they grow up---they shouldn't be discouraged. #2. Play with your kids. Seriously. I don't care if it's monopoly, scrabble, pokemon, Mario Brothers, or what. Play with them. And every once in a while when they've been pretty good--spoil them a little. All the best parents I know play with their kids in some way or another. You never know, you might even end up having fun!
The whole tone of Church teaching in regard to woman is, to the last degree, contemptuous and degrading. - Elizabeth Cady Stanton
No kids of my own, but the practicalities I got from my parents were:
1. When you get asked a question by your kids, tell them what's up. Don't waltz around difficult subjects - I knew were babies came from before I was six 2. Never, ever EVER cop out with, 'You'll understand when you're older', 'Because I said so', 'That's too hard for you' or similar rubbish - never forget that your kids are smarter and more adaptable than you think. Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
"Because I said so" is 100% OK by Rosemond; I've been reading his column for years, I understand his reasoning and concur.
The folks that think "Because I said so" somehow damages the little shits are completely wrong. The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it.
 (October 14, 2017 at 1:57 pm)vorlon13 Wrote: "Because I said so" is 100% OK by Rosemond; I've been reading his column for years, I understand his reasoning and concur. I don't think it "damages" kids, but it certainly is not a better answer than providing reasoning that the child can follow. Providing your reasoning for a decision is a great way to teach a child how to engage in smart decision-making, in my experience. Brushing their questions off with "because I said so" really only contains one lesson, which is that authority must be obeyed. RE: 2 pieces of advice for future parents
October 14, 2017 at 6:57 pm
(This post was last modified: October 14, 2017 at 8:48 pm by Edwardo Piet.)
1. Kids learn by example. "Do as I say not what I do" is a a failure for that reason.
2. Therefore... the best way to teach your children to respect themselves is by respecting yourself. |
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