I'm about to be a multi-millionaire!

[Joods]

I am so loving this! Are you posting to the other forum as well? I'm sure they would absolutely get a kick out of what you're doing.

[The Grand Nudger]

Not yet, still reading all their newbie stuff.  I want my intro to be glorious.

[Joods]

I'm quite sure it will be.

I can't believe I've been on that forum for nearly 6 and a half years. Ha ha.... I lurk a lot though. I guess it's time for me to look through my spam folder to see if I have any interesting letters to share.

[The Grand Nudger]

While we let Mrs Smith steam in her own juices and....hopefully...find some poor elderly uzbekistani woman to use as a front (hey....look at me, sending people to visit the dying)......

I've been setting up a quick numbers game with a dhl atm card scammer out of Benin.  

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-responding with my bait account from standard spam on my catcher account

I'm interested in getting this handled as quickly as possible, how do we proceed?  

-you guys should see this utterly unconvincing html "dhl" email bullshit form letter from "Kenneth", it's just lazy as fuck.  Flashing text, I guess, but 1/10 for effort.

ATTENTION: ,  

THANKS VERY MUCH FOR YOUR MESSAGE. THIS IS TO INFORM YOU THAT WE WILL BE IN YOUR DOORSTEP WITHIN 48 HOURS.

THIS IS TO INFORM YOU THAT THIS ATM CARD WAS REGISTERED HERE YESTERDAY BEEN 21ST MAY 2018 AND WE AGREED THAT THE DELIVERY OF THE ATM CARD WILL COMMENCE TOMORROW MORNING IMMEDIATELY  YOU CONTACT US AND HE HAS PAID FOR EVERYTHING INCLUDING THE DELIVERY CHARGE AND THE INSURANCE FEE BUT HE DID NOT PAY FOR THE SECURITY KEEPING FEE DUE TO WE DO NOT KNOW WHEN EXACTLY YOU WILL CONTACT US AND THE SECURITY KEEPING FEE IS US$25 PER DAY AND TODAY MAKE IT TWO DAY WHICH IS ONLY US$50 THAT YOU HAVE TO PAY TODAY TO ENABLE US COMMENCE ON THE DELIVERY AND IF THAT IS OKAY BY YOU KINDLY FORWARD TO US YOUR DELIVERY ADDRESS TO AVOID WRONG DELIVERY AND DEMAND FOR THE INFORMATION TO SEND THE US$50 TODAY.

WE WAIT TO HEAR FROM YOUR URGENT RESPOND.

I would like to mail you the payment as soon as possible, please send details.

THIS IS TO LET YOU KNOW THAT WE HAVE RECEIVE YOUR MESSAGE THIS MORNING AND WE ARE HERE CONFIRMING THE RECEIVER'S INFORMATION FOR THE PAYMENT AND I ALSO WANT YOU TO FORWARD YOUR DELIVERY INFORMATION AS SOON AS YOU SEND THE FEE OF US$50.00

THEREFORE,YOU ARE ADVISED TO GO TO  MONEY GRAM OR WESTERN UNION TRANSFER AND WIRE $50.00 TO THIS COMPANY WITH OUR CASHIER NAMES BELOW:


RECEIVER NAME....... PETER OFOR
COUNTRY....BENIN REPUBLIC
CITY...COTONOU
QUESTION...HOW LONG
ANSWER....48 HOURS
MTCN.......................... ......


 AS SOON AS THIS PAYMENT IS CONFIRMED HERE TODAY I WILL FORWARD TO YOU ALL DELIVERY INFORMATION TO ENABLE YOU KNOW EXACT TIME IT IS ARRIVING WITHIN 48 HOURS.


PLEASE NOTE THAT AGENT ASSIGNED FOR YOUR DELIVERY IS MR.JOHN MORRIS AND HE WILL LEAVE THIS COUNTRY AS SOON AS THE SECURITY KEEPING FEE IS RECEIVED.

HOWEVER, IT IS MY PLEASURE TO INFORM YOU THAT WE HAVE SECURED ALL THE RELEVANT DOCUMENTS TO AVOID ANY DELIVERY/HITCH ON THE WAY TO YOUR COUNTRY OR AT YOUR AIRPORT.

Thank you for all your help.  I;ve made the transfer as instructed.  What is the tracking number for delivery?

..............and I;ve got him, fucker goes off script.

I JUST RECEIVE YOUR MESSAGE SAYING THAT YOU HAVE MADE THE PAYMENT WITHOUT GIVEN ME THE PAYMENT DETAIL OR GIVEN ME YOUR DELIVERY ADDRESS AND PLEASE IF YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE NOT SERIOUS KINDLY STOP CONTACTING ME BUT IF YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAVE SEND THE MONEY GET BACK TO ME WITH THE PAYMENT INFORMATION SUCH AS THE MTCN

I already made the payment as instructed.  I;ve never sent money before, would the information you need be on my copy of the form or the receipt?  I don;t know what I;m looking for.  If I scanned the form and sent it to you could you help me?  I want to get my card as quickly as possible.  Please respond quickly, I have an appointment later this morning.

So greedy, he thinks the proverbial check is in the mail.

IF YOU HAVE SENT THE MONEY CAN YOU SCAN THE RECEIPT THAT WAS GIVEN TO YOU AND SEND TO ME AND I WILL CONFIRM IT FROM THE RECEIPT AND I WAIT TO HEAR FROM YOUR URGENT REPLY.

Ever the compliant victim, I send a corrupted file called "westernunion.jpg"

I scanned the form.  Thanks for all of your help.  Please get back to me quickly.

I DIDN'T SEE ANYTHING IN THE ATTACH FILE YOU SENT SO IF YOU ARE NOT READY TO SEND THE SCAN COPY OF THE PAYMENT SLIP THEN YOU CAN FORGET ABOUT THE PACKAGE.

Bad scammer, bad, Imma slap him around for being so rude to customers while dangling the nonexistent "payment" in his face and threatening to cancel the money that;s just sitting there waiting to be stolen.  Plus, invite him to waste more of his or his compatriots time as a "supervisor". 

The file is good and it has everything you asked for.  I did everything I was instructed to do.  I don;t know who you think you are, or what customer support is like in your country, but here you have to conduct business with respect.  If I don;t see resolution of this problem before I get home from my appointment I;ll be cancelling the payment and forwarding all of our communications to your supervisor.  

[hide]

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Sometime after COB in Benin I'll send a follow up claiming to have waited on hold after hours until I spoke with a csr who transferred me out to another rep, a respectful young man named Ojimbe who confirmed all of my details and had no trouble opening my file...but informed me that "Kenneth" was a scammer trying to claim my package....and that the payment was actually $250 usd, which I can pay through moneygram.  I;m onto you Ken, you scammer, I'll be paying the legit DHL rep first thing in the am and you'll never get my package!

...now I just need to make an email address for Ojimbe.

[The Grand Nudger]

It was 6pm in Benin...time to call DHL in Cotonou and tattle on Ken the Nasty Customer Service Rep!  One more slap in the face to get him all het up.  

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I just got off the phone with a real customer service rep from DHL in Cotonou, after being on hold and getting transferred out.  He was professional and courteous and had no trouble opening the file or confirming my details.  He told me that I should know better than to respond to scammers because theres a $200 international fee on all shipments in addition to the security holding fee.  He said that you were trying to get my details just to steal my package and that I should stop emailing you and change my password.  I don;t care because I just wanted you to know that I know, and that I;m going to go to western union when I go back into town again tomorrow and send the full amount to cover the international fee and you won;t be able to get my package.  And I;m just so angry because I had to spend money on long distance in addition to all of this.


You should be ashamed of yourself!!!  

 Quick on the ball and terrified that some other, better scammer had just stolen fifty bucks out from under him, he responds...concerned for me.

I HAVE NOTHING TO TELL YOU THAN I AM VERY SORRY FOR YOU BUT THE ONLY THING I WILL ASSURE YOU IS THAT YOU ARE TRYING TO PUT YOURSELF IN A MESS THAT YOU CANNOT BE ABLE TO COME OUT.







I TOLD YOU AT THE BEGINNING TO CONFIRM YOUR DELIVERY DETAIL TOGETHER WITH YOUR DIRECT PHONE NUMBER BUT YOU REFUSE AND NOW THE IMPOSTOR CLAIMING THAT HE IS FROM DHL IS TELLING YOU TO SEND US$200 AND YOU STILL AGREED WITH HIM TO SEND THE MONEY TOMORROW.







LET ME TELL YOU ONE THING AND THE THING IS THAT AFTER SENDING THE US$200 TO HIM YOU WILL STILL FIND OUT THAT HE WILL STILL DEMAND FOR MORE MONEY FROM YOU AND THAT IS WHEN YOU WILL CONFIRM MY WORDS AND BE INFORM THAT THIS OFFICE IS THE ONLY LEGAL OFFICE THAT YOU HAVE AN ATM CARD TO BE DELIVERED TO YOU AND THAT IS FINAL.






SO IF YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE READY TO RECEIVE THIS YOUR ATM CARD FROM US KINDLY RE-ATTACH THE PAYMENT SLIP GIVEN TO YOU FROM THE WESTERN UNION WHERE YOU SEND IT AND PROVIDE TO ME YOUR DETAILS AND THE TRACKING NUMBER OF THE PACKAGE WILL BE GIVEN TO YOU AS SOON AS WE CONFIRM THE PAYMENT.

I wait until 8pm Benin time..and, clearly shaken.....respond as a broken and victimized man....

I just called the Cotonou office again and asked to speak to Mr Marcel Ojimbe and I was told by the line operator that there was no one by that name at that office.  Now I don;t know who to trust and am worried about being scammed.  He seemed very nice when we spoke, but I don;t want to lose more money.  So I called my daughter in law and told her what had happened and she told me to cancel the the payment I had arranged but when I called the western union office they told me it had already went through and now I;m afraid I lost my money.  My grandson has to go in to the health department to be shot for measles tomorrow and Stacy says she can;t take me back to town until friday.  I;m very upset about this because that would be two more days so I would have to pay $100 in holding fees plus the $200 international fee and I have already lost $50 and my phone is out of minutes from all the long distance calls and I just want to make sure that my package gets sent to me instead of some scam artist!



I want to make the payments in full and get my package and I want to make sure I have done it right but I don;t know who to trust because $300 is alot of money and I have my appointments that I need to reschedule because of all of this and it;s very stressful.  I want to trust you but it's hard to trust anybody after all of this!  If you could send me a picture of you with todays paper and your company ID from DHL to show you are who you say you are and not a scam artist and I can have the payment of $300 in full by first thing friday morning and I can get my package sent to me finally.


Please respond soon with this proof if you are who you say you are!

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Too bad about my grandson, about to get shot for the measles - the sorry state of healthcare in america, and now I;m going to miss all of my appointments.  My phone is out of minutes and I;m out fifty bucks... but I dangle $300 in his face..in return for an old school proof of life. Let's see how resourceful "Ken" is.  

[Joods]

Bwhahahaha This is great! 

You should add some of these to your sig line so when people ask what they are, you can tell them all about the fun. Spread the word so that they too can fuck with these lads

[The Grand Nudger]

I think they both twigged.  I have a new batch now, updates as they respond. I;ve been contacted by Warren Buffet -and- Bill Gates. I;m a very lucky boy!