Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: December 27, 2024, 4:01 am

Thread Rating:
  • 1 Vote(s) - 5 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
The Valkyrie's Guide to...
#1
The Valkyrie's Guide to...
This is the first in a series of Guides from me to help you through life.

Today: Making Sushi.

1. Gather your ingredients.
2. Roll the ingredients together on the roller.
3. Realise you've completely messed up the sushi and nothing you can do will fix it.
4. Realise that the sushi is a metaphor for your life.
5. Roll into the fetal position under the table and wonder if anyone will ever love you.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
#2
RE: The Valkyrie's Guide to...
At work.

Hug

Heart

Though..... I must admit I expected a LOT more swords and people being dragged off to Valhalla in this thread.......

*Makes sure they have a blade on hand to die clutching

Wink
Reply
#3
RE: The Valkyrie's Guide to...
Women:

All women are bi.

It's up to you to discover if that's sexual or polar.

Taking requests.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
#4
RE: The Valkyrie's Guide to...
(September 30, 2018 at 2:03 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: Women:

All women are bi.

It's up to you to discover if that's sexual or polar.

Taking requests.

Why not both?
Reply
#5
RE: The Valkyrie's Guide to...
(September 30, 2018 at 2:05 pm)unfogged Wrote:
(September 30, 2018 at 2:03 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: Women:

All women are bi.

It's up to you to discover if that's sexual or polar.

Taking requests.

Why not both?

That's a far more complicated answer.

And it involves oranges.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
#6
RE: The Valkyrie's Guide to...
(September 30, 2018 at 1:32 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: This is the first in a series of Guides from me to help you through life.

Today:  Making Sushi.

1.  Gather your ingredients.
2.  Roll the ingredients together on the roller.
3.  Realise you've completely messed up the sushi and nothing you can do will fix it.
4.  Realise that the sushi is a metaphor for your life.
5.  Roll into the fetal position under the table and wonder if anyone will ever love you.

I love sushi! But I suck at preparing and or cooking any food. 

I once tried to help my X Wife make Japanese style pork dumplings. Her's came out pretty and symmetrical. Mine looked like Playdough. Story of my life. I feel ya!
Reply
#7
RE: The Valkyrie's Guide to...
At work.

Wait? Bi-lingual?

Well...... that explains a few things....
Reply
#8
RE: The Valkyrie's Guide to...
(September 30, 2018 at 1:32 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: This is the first in a series of Guides from me to help you through life.

Today:  Making Sushi.

1.  Gather your ingredients.
2.  Roll the ingredients together on the roller.
3.  Realise you've completely messed up the sushi and nothing you can do will fix it.
4.  Realise that the sushi is a metaphor for your life.
5.  Roll into the fetal position under the table and wonder if anyone will ever love you.

This sounds nothing like the Valk I know.

Have you been kidnapped Tania?
Being told you're delusional does not necessarily mean you're mental. 
Reply
#9
RE: The Valkyrie's Guide to...
(September 30, 2018 at 2:30 pm)wyzas Wrote:
(September 30, 2018 at 1:32 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: This is the first in a series of Guides from me to help you through life.

Today:  Making Sushi.

1.  Gather your ingredients.
2.  Roll the ingredients together on the roller.
3.  Realise you've completely messed up the sushi and nothing you can do will fix it.
4.  Realise that the sushi is a metaphor for your life.
5.  Roll into the fetal position under the table and wonder if anyone will ever love you.

This sounds nothing like the Valk I know.

Have you been kidnapped Tania?

This isn't me.

I can't stand sushi so I would never attempt to make it.

Smile

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
#10
RE: The Valkyrie's Guide to...
Valk, are you single?
Reply



Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  The Valkyrie's (semi) Daily Words of Wisdom The Valkyrie 21 1314 September 4, 2024 at 1:14 pm
Last Post: Nay_Sayer
  Dessert at the Valkyrie Cafe no one 13 1243 April 11, 2023 at 8:45 am
Last Post: The Valkyrie
  HAPPY BIRTHDAY, THE VALKYRIE!!!! BrianSoddingBoru4 22 1927 November 29, 2020 at 9:37 pm
Last Post: The Architect Of Fate
  Happy birthday, The Valkyrie. WinterHold 20 3091 December 2, 2019 at 1:27 am
Last Post: Fake Messiah
  Happy Birthday The Valkyrie brewer 30 3588 December 1, 2018 at 11:29 am
Last Post: Private
  Happy Bithday Valkyrie brewer 32 2806 November 30, 2017 at 8:55 pm
Last Post: The Valkyrie
  Idiot's guide to taking care of a frying pan? Chad32 29 5443 February 23, 2017 at 2:29 pm
Last Post: The Grand Nudger
  Challenge: Formulate a guide to win a Nobel Prize ErGingerbreadMandude 17 3005 February 3, 2016 at 12:10 pm
Last Post: c172



Users browsing this thread: 2 Guest(s)