Stupid things religious people say

[Mister Agenda]

From my Facebook feed, which I admit the algorithms basically say I'm asking for this kind of stuff:

Atheists, provide me all of your non-anecdotal evidence for science. Hint: if all you have learned of science is through lectures, textbooks, and documentaries, you only have anecdotal evidence. For you to have empirical evidence, you would have to personally recreate the experiments that empirically verify all the scientific knowledge that you claim to know.

[Angrboda]

Likely an artifact in a worldview whose accreditation standards heavily rely on authority. They have trouble seeing any other fact provider as operating differently.

[Fake Messiah]

Not again.

Noah’s Ark mystery deepens as researcher blows lid on strange rock formations in Turkey

Andrew Jones, a researcher with Noah’s Ark Scans, told GB News that “exciting new findings” about the rock formation first discovered in 1959 on Turkey’s Mount Ararat could prove the boat from the Book of Genesis once existed.

Ground penetrating radar scans and soil samples from the tunnel site — which reportedly match the 515-foot dimensions of Noah’s Ark — uncovered a series of “corridors” below the earth, the outlet reported.

Tunnels were discovered running down the middle of the “boat” and alongside the inside edge of the possible ship, leading to a central cavity Jones called the atrium.

“God told Noah to bring the animals in. And so these animals would have stayed there, plus Noah and his family. What’s interesting is that these voids are lining up below the ground – and they’re not just random,” Jones told the outlet.

“These tunnels are also following a pattern. GPR is just a way to look below the soil using radar. There’s also been studies done with IRT, which is another geophysical technique – and they’re showing a ship-shaped hull still preserved deep in the soil,” the researcher said.

The phenomenon, however, could be tectonic plates shifting and raising the rock formation high above the prehistoric ocean.

https://nypost.com/2026/04/21/science/re...k-mystery/

[Fake Messiah]

A Tribe Living On A Remote Island In The Pacific Ocean Believes Prince Philip Was A God

In 1974, Queen Elizabeth II and her husband Prince Philip made an official visit to Tanna Island. The Yaohnanen people, seeing the level of respect accorded to Queen Elizabeth by the various government officials, concluded that Prince Philip must be the son of the mountain spirit referred to in their legends. The Cult of Prince Philip was born.

https://www.iflscience.com/how-a-tribe-l...-god-83272

[Angrboda]

No crazier than any other religious belief. Facts aren't something religion cares about.

[Fake Messiah]

Voodoo priest hopes to reverse ‘Curse of the Mambino’ as Mets try ending 11-game losing streak

A Voodoo King descended on Citi Field Tuesday, using a goat’s head and black magic to try to undo the dreaded Curse of the Mambino that saw the Mets lose 11 straight games — but his efforts fell short.

Michael Washington, who goes by the name Tata Tilk, wore a black cloak and used a cauldron outside the stadium to try undo the socialist sorcery fuming fans believe was unleashed when Mayor Zohran Mamdani hugged mascots Mr. and Mrs. Met on April 9.

“These spells that were put on the Mets team came from dark entities, so it’s going to take dark entities to remove it,” Washington told The Post.

“I’m going to do a full reversal and send it back to the witches and wizards that sent it, because it was more than one person that actually did the affliction on the team,” he added, explaining that one of those warlocks was the fledgling mayor himself.

“I’m removing Mayor Mamdani’s malevolent witchcraft. I’m getting his name, date of birth, things like that, and getting the curse he placed on the team when he hugged the mascot away from the team.”

But the dark powers enveloping the Mets were not going down without a fight.

Despite Washington’s enthusiastic approach, the Mets curse wasn’t lifted Tuesday. The team blew another lead and were defeated 5-3 by the Minnesota Twins for their 12th loss in a row.

https://nypost.com/2026/04/21/us-news/vo...mets-game/

[Fake Messiah]

"No kids, no problem. There are always dogs."



And, as the number of people interested in priesthood declines, they will be replaced by animals. Soon, Catholics will enter the church and all they will see is a cow and a dog standing at the altar.

[Fake Messiah]

Quotes by Fulton Sheen, and me trying to make sense of them.

"Never visit a psychiatrist who is divorced" — just the opposite. Better stay away from people in unhappy and terrible marriages, especially if they are responsible for your mental health, because these people are miserable and will make you miserable as well.

"If you don't behave as you believe, you will end by believing as you behave." — this sounds self contradictory because how can someone believe in how he behaves if he doesn't behave as he believes?

"There are not one hundred people in the United States who hate The Catholic Church, but there are millions who hate what they wrongly perceive the Catholic Church to be." — the Catholic Church definitely gave its best to hide what it really is.

"Hearing nuns' confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn." — then don't force them into confession if they have nothing to confess.

"The difference between the love of a man and the love of a woman is that a man will always give reasons for loving, but a woman gives no reasons for loving." — really? Women don't give reasons why they love some guy? Sheesh, Sheen, what kind of women have you been dating?

"Books are the most wonderful friends in the world. When you meet them and pick them up, they are always ready to give you a few ideas. When you put them down, they never get mad; when you take them up again, they seem to enrich you all the more." — oh, so he's been dating books. Well, they certainly didn't make you any smarter.

"Very few people believe in the devil these days, which suits the devil very well. He is always helping to circulate the news of his own death." — yes, the devil has fooled people that he doesn't exist so much so that he hid all the evidence of his existence.

[Fake Messiah]

According to this Catholic priest and a monsignor (whatever that is), if you wake up with scratches that come in three, then you have been scratched by a demon. Especially if you are also experiencing problems with the apps on your phone with which you talk with other Catholics, then you are under a demonic attack, and you better call his team to fight off this demon.

Please don't laugh at this because that's exactly what the demon wants.

I woke up this week with some unexplained scratches on my right shoulder- too far apart to be an animal and I don't have a cat. "Ahh," it dawned on me, "it's demonic." Mine are very similar to the demonic scratches that one of our team members received about a month ago. These scratches are usually in three's, a mockery of the Holy Trinity. They are about 6-12" in length, although I have seen longer. They don't hurt and the person does not wake up when it happens-- more signs that they are preternatural.

Satan is trying to frighten us. Demons feed off unforgiveness, anger, arrogance and fear! Our Team's constant refrain, especially with the demonically afflicted, is: "Jesus I trust in you." Be at peace and trust in Him. Moreover, looking at the scratches, it proves how chained Satan really is and thus how powerless.

In addition to these preternatural scratches and bruises, demons regularly mess with our technology. Chatting with other Catholic online programs, we are all subject to the same unexplained, strange, tech problems that occur only when engaged in a Spirit-filled ministry. Nevertheless, our ministries always manage to go forward. God's Kingdom will NOT be thwarted by the Evil One. Again, it shows Satan's Kingdom has been destroyed and how powerless he has become.

The scratches are a trifle and tech problems are a nuisance, but the real danger is more subtle. In a more hidden fashion, Satan and his minions mess with our minds. They incite conflict, distrust, negativism, and discord. They prey upon our emotional weaknesses and exacerbate them.

Make no mistake: Satan was a high-ranking powerful angel. In his natural state, he could overwhelm, torture, and kill all of us very quickly. And it is certain that he would if he could. Looking into the "eyes" of demons during an exorcism I am always stunned by the murderous rage therein. It is beyond human.

https://www.thefloridacatholic.org/faith...48ad3.html

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

^

According to this Catholic priest and a monsignor (whatever that is)

It’s an honorific bestowed by the Pope for exception service to the Church. It’s not an ecclesiastical rank like priest or bishop, more of an attaboy.

All those years in Catholic school occasionally come in handy.

Boru