That stupid criminal thread.

[Brian37]

Post your stories here. I can be something you saw in the news, or it can be a personal witness thing. 

For example. 

When I was a kid, my parents sailed to downtown Annapolis MD, and docked. It was about mid day. Suddenly we hear alarms go off, and looked down the dock, down the street, and saw two guys run out of a store, then police chasing them. The dumbasses ran down the dock and jumped in the water. Needless to say, they got arrested.

Another example. I use do do a "stupid criminal" segment when I did a public access radio show. I'd look up stories on the internet. One guy decided to do a home invasion, ran into the old guy living there, and locked him in a closet. Dumbass didn't check the content of the closet. The robber felt sorry for the old man, and decided to let him out. Unfortunately for the thief, he didn't know that is where the old man kept his guns. The old man held him at gunpoint until the police came to arrest him.

I've also heard stories of robbers casing a joint, buying something with their real credit cards or checks, come back and rob them. 

What are your most interesting stories of "What a dumbass"?

[Angrboda]

Some dumbfuck on a forum tried to steal my attention with a lame thread.

[Brian37]

Some dumbfuck on a forum tried to steal my attention with a lame thread.

So someone put a gun to your head and forced you to click on the thread? Let me know who that was, I'll call 911.

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

We’ve all heard the stories about people who try to rob bars that turned out to be hangouts for off-duty cops. I recall a story about two guys who tried a strong-arm robbery at a karate dojo, which turned out just as you’d expect.

Boru

[Angrboda]

Some dumbfuck on a forum tried to steal my attention with a lame thread.

So someone put a gun to your head and forced you to click on the thread? Let me know who that was, I'll call 911.

I didn't mean you. I was talking about a different dumbfuck. Why so sensitive?

[Brian37]

We’ve all heard the stories about people who try to rob bars that turned out to be hangouts for off-duty cops. I recall a story about two guys who tried a strong-arm robbery at a karate dojo, which turned out just as you’d expect.

Boru

I'd love to have been a real live witness to that. 

That is funny as shit. 

Another story I got off of the net while doing the public access radio show, was a story about a guy who tried to rob a deli, and the owner chased him out with a big slab of frozen salami. The robber ran out, and jumped in to the trunk of a car and closed the trunk. Turned out the car was an unmarked police car.

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

We’ve all heard the stories about people who try to rob bars that turned out to be hangouts for off-duty cops. I recall a story about two guys who tried a strong-arm robbery at a karate dojo, which turned out just as you’d expect.

Boru

I'd love to have been a real live witness to that. 

That is funny as shit. 

Another story I got off of the net while doing the public access radio show, was a story about a guy who tried to rob a deli, and the owner chased him out with a big slab of frozen salami. The robber ran out, and jumped in to the trunk of a car and closed the trunk. Turned out the car was an unmarked police car.

I doubt that one’s true.

Boru

[Brian37]

I'd love to have been a real live witness to that. 

That is funny as shit. 

Another story I got off of the net while doing the public access radio show, was a story about a guy who tried to rob a deli, and the owner chased him out with a big slab of frozen salami. The robber ran out, and jumped in to the trunk of a car and closed the trunk. Turned out the car was an unmarked police car.

I doubt that one’s true.

Boru

If you are assuming the robber had a gun, that isn't always true. Even with bank robberies, sometimes the robber only implies he has a gun, and only really has a note.

[BrianSoddingBoru4]

I doubt that one’s true.

Boru

If you are assuming the robber had a gun, that isn't always true. Even with bank robberies, sometimes the robber only implies he has a gun, and only really has a note.

Not assuming that at all. I just don’t believe that the boot of an unmarked police car would be standing open. Don’t presume what I assume.

Boru

[Brian37]

If you are assuming the robber had a gun, that isn't always true. Even with bank robberies, sometimes the robber only implies he has a gun, and only really has a note.

Not assuming that at all. I just don’t believe that the boot of an unmarked police car would be standing open.

Boru

It was long ago for sure, so no, I cannot find a link to the actual story. But despite your best attempts to counter everything I say, it was a real crime story. Just like the robbers I directly witnessed running down the dock as a kid.

If you talk about anything in your past you know is true, should I always think you are making it up? 

I've met Pat Benatar, I've met Jay Leno, I shook hands with Bill Clinton. Do I have proof of that? No. But that does not mean I am lying? 

I think you really need to relax on always insisting on perfection. 

If I claimed I was dating Angelina Jolie, then you'd have real reason to question me.