What (in your society) is a 'real man'?

[Thumpalumpacus]

A duty to care and enough commitment to make something out of it.

I wish our society shared this outlook. That's not to deprecate those of us who hold it, only that it's not a big thing here, things like duty and commitment. I see it in some, but to far too many, those words are just words.

[The Grand Nudger]

We live in a society that strongly favors that outcome, and, ironically, one that was built to be that way by the very same people exhorting the suckers they fundraise from to be real men.

[paulpablo]

For me, the message I got from my surrounding UK culture was that a 'real man' was a tall, physically strong, adult heterosexual male, with a deep voice, who had killed other men in combat, could drink prodigious amounts, ate lots of meat, was fully independent, never displayed fear or sentimentality, had a large number of sexual conquests, enjoyed playing sports, and was an expert in engineering and DIY.

What message did you recieve in your culture about what constituted a 'real man'?

I live in the UK and people normally use the term in relation to looking after your children and family properly.

I've never heard anyone talking about being a real man in relation to liking meat , sports and beer without some sense of irony or exaggeration.

There's a lot of stuff like that in relation to people being gay, if you don't like football you're gay, or certain drinks are gay, I've never heard anyone using the terminology of not being a real man though in relation to that stuff.

As a joke someone might put on a southern American accent and say "cmon be a real man" and offer you a beer or something or dare you to do something. But I think that's more of an exaggerated stereotypical view of southern American culture and copying it as a joke.

[FrustratedFool]

Interesting. My experience of the UK is different.

I've never encountered anyone thinking of a real man in terms of family provision - that would seem almost the opposite!

I suspect generation, class, and region play a big factor here. The UK is a very diverse place!

And, of course, the media has a loud voice on these matters, so much was likely imbibed from movies and TV.

[brewer]

Those without brown streaks in their drawers.

[Nanny]

Seems the RWNJs are, among their many grievances, concerned about "masculinity" and what they see as its decline.

I think this is more a reaction to being told to wear masks, be tolerant of others, and really just not to be a dick.

Then former guy normalized moaning about anything that bothers you as if it's the most egregious trespass on their FREEDOM.

So I see this Kevin Sorbo "bring back masculine men" for what it is - petulance.

[The Grand Nudger]

Seems the RWNJs are, among their many grievances, concerned about "masculinity" and what they see as its decline.

It's super simple.  Tell people to do something that they can't or shouldn't - and then fundraise off the disappointment and frustration they inevitably feel while offering them an organizing scapegoat so that you can maintain perpetual minority rule through the superior motivation of the intentionally disaffected.

How this works in practice, is that you tell poor white trash to be "real men" even as you ensure that they can't make a living wage. That'll get you some raw numbers, but poor white trash doesn't have any money and you want that. So you tell rich white assholes that being a real man is being able to be an asshole without consequence. That fails..for them, too, and they shovel their money at you like the suckers they are while you promise to make reality match the demands you gave them...and, ofc, don't..because that might cost you that money you just scammed them out of.

It's the best. Satire is dead because you just couldn't write better stuff. The culture warriors are screaming to high heaven about china and commies as cover and preamble to the single largest wealth transfer in human history.

[Gawdzilla Sama]

I've been told plenty of times that I'm not a real man.  Which is in part what led me to abandon the label of man altogether, so I guess they're now right, lol.

But the criteria for what counts as a 'real man' is fairly vague.

For me, the message I got from my surrounding UK culture was that a 'real man' was a tall, physically strong, adult heterosexual male, with a deep voice, who had killed other men in combat, could drink prodigious amounts, ate lots of meat, was fully independent, never displayed fear or sentimentality, had a large number of sexual conquests, enjoyed playing sports, and was an expert in engineering and DIY.

What message did you recieve in your culture about what constituted a 'real man'?

No man stands so tall as when he stoops to help a child.

A real man would be the one who showed up to help Horatius.

[FrustratedFool]

That's a noble sentiment. It'd be nice if that was how my society operated, if it had to have any gender markers at all.

But it doesn't. What, in reality, did your society teach you about masculinity and about being a real man?

[Gawdzilla Sama]

That's a noble sentiment.  It'd be nice if that was how my society operated, if it had to have any gender markers at all.

But it doesn't.  What, in reality, did your society teach you about masculinity and about being a real man?

I got more instruction from books than from the adults around me. I wanted to be Jubal Harshaw.