Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: November 4, 2024, 5:09 pm
Atheist Forums › Science › General Science v
How often do you fart?

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Thread Modes
How often do you fart?
Minimalist Offline Donators
Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
*****
Religious Views: Fuck It
Posts: 69247
Threads: 3759
Joined: August 2, 2009
Reputation: 259
#11
RE: How often do you fart?
July 28, 2011 at 3:36 pm
(July 28, 2011 at 7:31 am)Rhythm Wrote: All day long, every day, in full public view and experience. If twenty minutes goes by without me farting, I'm probably getting a little uncomfortable.



I used to work with a guy like that. He could fart at a whim. Claimed that he "always had one in the chamber."
Find
Reply
Oldandeasilyconfused Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: Agnostic Atheist
Posts: 7388
Threads: 168
Joined: February 25, 2009
Reputation: 45
#12
RE: How often do you fart?
July 28, 2011 at 8:24 pm
Quote:Obviously beans as well.

Cook them yourself, WITHOUT SALT.

What I REALLY hate is farting in bed while I'm watching TV, then lifting the quilt out of curiosity and deeply offending myself. I keep hoping for a fragrant one. No luck so far.Cool Shades
Find
Reply
Violet Offline
Buffalo and Bee Lover
*****
Religious Views: There are beeautiful cloud buffalo in the sky.
Posts: 15755
Threads: 194
Joined: May 15, 2009
Reputation: 145
#13
RE: How often do you fart?
July 28, 2011 at 8:36 pm
(July 28, 2011 at 8:24 pm)padraic Wrote:
Quote:Obviously beans as well.

Cook them yourself, WITHOUT SALT.

What I REALLY hate is farting in bed while I'm watching TV, then lifting the quilt out of curiosity and deeply offending myself. I keep hoping for a fragrant one. No luck so far.Cool Shades

Cook things myself? Haha... I have servants and slaves you know Sleepy

And whoever heard of eating an unsalted bean? That's just pointless Wink
Please give me a home where cloud buffalo roam
Where the dear and the strangers can play
Where sometimes is heard a discouraging word
But the skies are not stormy all day
Find
Reply
Oldandeasilyconfused Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: Agnostic Atheist
Posts: 7388
Threads: 168
Joined: February 25, 2009
Reputation: 45
#14
RE: How often do you fart?
July 28, 2011 at 8:42 pm (This post was last modified: July 28, 2011 at 8:42 pm by Oldandeasilyconfused.)


No no no. You add the salt AFTER cooking. Cooking them with salt hardens the cellulose covering and causes flatulence.


I cook as much of my own food as possible from scratch,for the sake of my heath. Also because it's cheaper and I'm too mean to spit.Tiger
Find
Reply
Dotard Offline
Card carrying member of NO MA'AM
***
Religious Views: Asuperstitionist. Silly theists, myths are for kids!
Posts: 2241
Threads: 94
Joined: December 4, 2008
Reputation: 24
#15
RE: How often do you fart?
July 28, 2011 at 10:48 pm
(July 27, 2011 at 11:19 pm)padraic Wrote: How often do you fart?

Glad you asked! I must take a high fiber supplements and eat high fiber due to the amount of internal scar tissue I tote around.

I'm the proud bearer of an unusual talent. I can fart on que'. Seriously. I can.
Say "Hey Dotard! Rip one!" and I can deliver. Crazy, I know. But true.

Normal day consists of non stop explosive anal syndrome. Luckilly (<--is that a word?) I still possess the buns of steel to cage the beast.

Pitty the day I'm to old to due so.
I used to tell a lot of religious jokes. Not any more, I'm a registered sects offender.
---------------
...the least christian thing a person can do is to become a christian. ~Chuck
---------------
NO MA'AM
[Image: attemptingtogiveadamnc.gif]
Find
Reply
Shell B Offline
Posting Freak
*****
Religious Views: Who needs 'em?
Posts: 12806
Threads: 158
Joined: February 13, 2010
Reputation: 111
#16
RE: How often do you fart?
July 29, 2011 at 12:33 am
Luckily is indeed a word. Smile
Find
Reply
Minimalist Offline Donators
Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
*****
Religious Views: Fuck It
Posts: 69247
Threads: 3759
Joined: August 2, 2009
Reputation: 259
#17
RE: How often do you fart?
July 29, 2011 at 12:34 am
(July 29, 2011 at 12:33 am)Shell B Wrote: Luckily is indeed a word. Smile

However it would not apply to a guy standing downwind from you.
Find
Reply
A Theist Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: Backslid Pentecostal Christian and Forum Agitator
Posts: 3522
Threads: 165
Joined: November 17, 2009
Reputation: 27
#18
RE: How often do you fart?
August 5, 2011 at 8:45 am
    The old gentleman sitting in the back row just farted. Let me tell you how it's all George Bush's fault.
"Inside every Liberal there's a Totalitarian screaming to get out"

[Image: freddy_03.jpg]

Quote: JohnDG...
Quote:It was an awful mistake to characterize based upon religion. I should not judge any theist that way, I must remember what I said in order to change.
Find
Reply
The Grand Nudger Offline
Retired Staff
*****
Religious Views: Invasive
Posts: 67039
Threads: 140
Joined: June 28, 2011
Reputation: 162
#19
RE: How often do you fart?
August 5, 2011 at 8:58 am
A pentecostal christian that doesn't like Obama. Now who would have seen that coming?
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
Find
Reply
leo-rcc Offline
Support Intelligent falling!
*****
Religious Views: Pastafarian
Posts: 4807
Threads: 291
Joined: October 29, 2008
Reputation: 35
#20
RE: How often do you fart?
August 5, 2011 at 10:48 am
Not nearly enough. Farting is fun.
Best regards,
Leo van Miert
Horsepower is how hard you hit the wall --Torque is how far you take the wall with you
Pastafarian
Find
Reply


Atheist Forums › Science › General Science v
How often do you fart?

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Atheism's brilliant often counter-intuitive rewiring. Edwardo Piet 3 2244 November 7, 2008 at 8:27 am
Last Post: Edwardo Piet



Users browsing this thread: 3 Guest(s)