Rhythm Wrote:It's like a real life game of mafia isn't it...lol.

You know, that's probably why I've never lost a game of mafia.....noobs.  I have a performance enhancing disorder, the mafia equivalent of a doper crushing the 100m.  

And when it comes to Mafia I get Narcissistic Supply from being the biggest poster and most anti-town tunnelling bastard and most difficult person to play with. I thrive on the negative attention. Totally. I mean... turtley. For realz. Innit. (Pretending to be sarcastic so no one finds me out).

I think using celebrities as examples of narcissism based on "weird behaviour" is tricky, because you have to remember, these are people who are almost constantly in the spotlight. Celebrities like Rihanna can't live "normal" lives because they can't go out without being mobbed by paparazzi and/or fans, who don't care about the celebrities' personal space because they're more concerned with "OMG I MET RIHANNA!!!!!!". They also face constant media speculation about what's going on in their lives, which often includes very false and spiteful rumours. If a celebrity appears self-serving or acting in a strange way, it might not necessarily be their personality, it could actually be frustration at the lack of respect for privacy and empathy that people can have for them.

And that's especially pertinent to a lot of these younger celebrities who blow up when they're teenagers, who are still finding themselves in life. It's typically the people who started their careers as teenagers, like Lindsay Lohan, Britney, Justin Bieber and others, who are the ones most likely to fly off the handle.  

Some can obviously handle the fame better than others though. I don't want to sound biased since I am a fan of Rihanna, she's not perfect, but she's kept herself together far better than a lot of others.

There are a lot of reasons someone can seek attention. Rhianna would need an actual diagnosis. After all Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD) has attention seeking behavior too and it's far more common in females whereas NPD is far more common in males.

(August 20, 2016 at 10:37 am)Rhythm Wrote: (ah, but I'm desperately seeking kudos for that novella...so no...I haven't recovered.  I don't have a cure, can't tell people how to cure themselves.  What I've done, is just retask it and consciously build a better habit set.  There's always the chance, and frankly the fear...that I'll dive back down into the oubliette and fuck up the life I've built for myself.  I did it once before...and all it took was one really shitty day at work.)

Kudos me more and I may kudos you more

I actually knew a guy who I think had a sociopathic and narcissistic personality. It's absolutely horrible when you meet someone like that, because they're so manipulative and can say horrible things but talk their way out of it.

This was my Mom's ex-boyfriend, who I've spoken about many times on this forum. He was an absolute monster, telling lies about our Dad just to compensate and cover up that he was doing the exact same things he claimed he didn't like about him. He said abusive things about my brother, which again was hypocritical, because the things he was criticizing about my brother was also stuff he was guilty of (parasitical behaviour). He made threats of violence on several occasions.

I can only think how fortunate it is that Mom finally woke up and kicked him out.

(August 20, 2016 at 10:54 am)Alasdair Ham Wrote: There are a lot of reasons someone can seek attention. Rhianna would need an actual diagnosis. After all Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD) has attention seeking behavior too and it's far more common in females whereas NPD is far more common in males.

My amateur opinion, but did read a bit about this a while ago: Could be due to sexist interpretations/expectations. A male person might be better diagnosed with HPD but end up being diagnosed as NPD because Histrionic behaviour may manifest differently in male persons than in female persons in general. And if you think about it, the ideal HPD person in people's minds is usually female whereas ideal NPD figure is usually male. Which may reinforce the idea that HPD is predominantly female while NPD predominantly male.

Yes. HPD is also hypersexual but that is considered normal in males because manslut shaming doesn't seem to exist.

IMO every attractive adult female should behave like a complete, turtle and utter slut including asexuals just so I get to have more fun.

(August 20, 2016 at 10:51 am)Yeauxleaux Wrote: Some can obviously handle the fame better than others though. I don't want to sound biased since I am a fan of Rihanna, she's not perfect, but she's kept herself together far better than a lot of others.

She does seem to have kept it together admirably.

Celebrities aren't crazy -people-, they're normal people with crazy bank accounts and crazy lives.  Hand me that much cash...subject me to that level of scrutinty...and watch how quickly I circle the batshit drain. I;d demand a cannon that fired boxes of kittens and provide a public demonstration of the tech in the parking lot of the local vietnamese restaurant...just because I was bored and had run out of "normal" shit to do and spend my money on.

That's the way this always goes. We hear about them initially, they become celebrities. Then it goes dark for awhile...and the next time we hear about them it's positively fucking tragic. In the interim...thy ran out of shit to do but didn't run out of money or time.

"OMG, did you hear about rhythm...remember last year when he was so normal, he won the lotto...I heard he built a Kitty Kannon™ and some of the cats went through a semi window on i-64 - there was a huge pileup...now he's in prison and the legal defense took every penny he had left...so sad...I heard he even found jesus in there...so I guess that's where ole JC was hiding all this time!"

(August 20, 2016 at 11:34 am)Alasdair Ham Wrote: Yes. HPD is also hypersexual but that is considered normal in males because manslut shaming doesn't seem to exist.

IMO every attractive adult female should behave like a complete, turtle and utter slut including asexuals just so I get to have more fun.

Which makes me sometimes question whether this should even be a disorder anymore.

Like so many other aspects of human personality, I think narcissism exists on a continuum and not as a quirky add-on which some have and some don't.  As I see it, one is better off to have an excess of the trait than a deficit .. but only up to a point.  And knowing yourself including your flaws and challenges is always better than being in the dark.  As this site discusses, being narcissistic is more than having an excess of confidence.  The part about the unrecognized insecurity beneath the surface is important.

I know this condition from the inside having done a little counseling in the past.  I think I have a handle on it and some perspective.  It never just goes away but it has less power if you understand what it is.  If  you see how it is affecting you, you have more choices in how you respond in situations where it gets triggered.  Especially in relationship the tendency to respond with rage is a constant possibility.  I messages help, looking to acknowledge the reasonableness of the other person's words and actions does too.  I also remind myself constantly that people have a right to be different than me and are ultimately a mystery beyond my complete comprehension.  Married 30+ years now so something is working.

I do wish that people wouldn't just assume that narcissists are unredeemable moral lepers.  Apparently when I was just starting to talk I spoke so quickly people had a hard time understanding me.  Being asked to slow down and repeat myself would throw me into a rage in which I'd kick chins or destroy the house.  Obviously I don't directly remember any of that, just the being told about it later.  But if that is right, it makes me wonder how much narcissism is something you're born with as opposed to being created by environments.

Quote:Definition
By Mayo Clinic Staff

Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for admiration and a lack of empathy for others. But behind this mask of ultraconfidence lies a fragile self-esteem that's vulnerable to the slightest criticism.

A narcissistic personality disorder causes problems in many areas of life, such as relationships, work, school or financial affairs. You may be generally unhappy and disappointed when you're not given the special favors or admiration you believe you deserve. Others may not enjoy being around you, and you may find your relationships unfulfilling.

Narcissistic personality disorder treatment is centered around talk therapy (psychotherapy).

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/basics/definition/con-20025568

Quote:Symptoms

By Mayo Clinic Staff

Narcissistic personality disorder is one of several types of personality disorders. Personality disorders are conditions in which people have traits that cause them to feel and behave in socially distressing ways, limiting their ability to function in relationships and other areas of their life, such as work or school. 

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If you have narcissistic personality disorder, you may come across as conceited, boastful or pretentious. You often monopolize conversations. You may belittle or look down on people you perceive as inferior. You may feel a sense of entitlement — and when you don't receive special treatment, you may become impatient or angry. You may insist on having "the best" of everything — for instance, the best car, athletic club or medical care.

At the same time, you have trouble handling anything that may be perceived as criticism. You may have secret feelings of insecurity, shame, vulnerability and humiliation. To feel better, you may react with rage or contempt and try to belittle the other person to make yourself appear superior. Or you may feel depressed and moody because you fall short of perfection.
Many experts use the criteria in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), published by the American Psychiatric Association, to diagnose mental conditions. This manual is also used by insurance companies to reimburse for treatment.

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Quote:DSM-5 criteria for narcissistic personality disorder include these features:

Quote:

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• Having an exaggerated sense of self-importance
  
  
• Expecting to be recognized as superior even without achievements that warrant it
  
  
• Exaggerating your achievements and talents
  
  
• Being preoccupied with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate
  
  
• Believing that you are superior and can only be understood by or associate with equally special people
  
  
• Requiring constant admiration
  
  
• Having a sense of entitlement
  
  
• Expecting special favors and unquestioning compliance with your expectations
  
  
• Taking advantage of others to get what you want
  
  
• Having an inability or unwillingness to recognize the needs and feelings of others
  
  
• Being envious of others and believing others envy you
  
  
• Behaving in an arrogant or haughty manner
  

Although some features of narcissistic personality disorder may seem like having confidence, it's not the same. Narcissistic personality disorder crosses the border of healthy confidence into thinking so highly of yourself that you put yourself on a pedestal and value yourself more than you value others.

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