ATTENTION!

If you, or someone you know, have witnesses Jehovah behaving in ways that are unbelievable, then you need immediate help. Jehovah is known for retaliating against those who question his practices, and he reserves particularly wicked punishment for those who deny his existence altogether. It is vitally imperative that you seek help immediately if you have engaged in any of the following practices:

*Using critical thinking.
*Applying logical arguments to illogical claims.
*Asking sincere questions about Jehovah (this makes his mob feel unsafe).
*Searching for evidence which leads to truth (any truth).
*Using science - at all.
*Celebrating your birthday (because it’s not about you - but he loves you)
*Having friends who are not his followers.
*Participating in any other group but his.
*Being in the military (ever).
*Voting, or having interest in politics outside of his compounds.
*Donating blood or having a transfusion of donated blood.
*Having desires (nearly any at all).

For a complete list of activities that will get you shunned or worse, please visit… http://thejehovahswitnesses.org/things-j....php#rules

BE WARNED!
They have watchtowers inside their gated compounds; THEY WILL USE THEM! They have been seen sending armies out into the streets. These armies WILL come right to your front door! If you, or someone you know has broken any of the 141 rules they call for adherance to, you will be condemned! Contact the JWPP IMMEDIATELY if you have any doubts, fears or questions.

(August 15, 2013 at 1:38 pm)freedomfromfallacy Wrote: For a complete list of activities that will get you shunned or worse, please visit… http://thejehovahswitnesses.org/things-j....php#rules

Daumn...

You'd think if a biblical offshoot was gonna demand a vanilla existence like that, they would at least promise actual heaven as a reward...not just eternity on earth.

I couldn't hack being that boring in just this life!

I ran into a lot of these guys during my sojourn out in Poland. Apparently they proselytized there despite the laws against organized religion at the time of Soviet Russia. Sneaky bastards.

Oh my god, their rules are crazy. What can a Jehovah Witness do?!

Quote:141 rules. Things Jehovah Witnesses can't do.

(...)

67. Play bingo

!??!!?!!!?

(August 15, 2013 at 6:13 pm)pineapplebunnybounce Wrote: Oh my god, their rules are crazy. What can a Jehovah Witness do?!

Quote:141 rules. Things Jehovah Witnesses can't do.

(...)

67. Play bingo

!??!!?!!!?

Funny shit hey? And that's from the JW website itself! If you think that's funny, then you should check out this parody site. It's awesome!
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/

What's even funnier is when I got to Rule 141, there's "Things JW can't do, Part 2"

There's nothing like the fear of being ostracized by all of your friends and family to keep the sheep in line, eh?

What a painful existence.

Makes me wonder what their suicide rate is.

(August 15, 2013 at 9:00 pm)Faith No More Wrote: What a painful existence.

Makes me wonder what their suicide rate is.

I've had friends die for their religion. It's all too real in my experience.