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Atheist Forums › Community › Religion › Christianity v
Dear Christians

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Dear Christians
My imaginary friend is GOD Offline
Resident Gaytheist
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#61
RE: Dear Christians
March 28, 2014 at 8:38 am
What this thread says to me right now:

Dear Christians, please have all the SEX you can possibly have... NOW.

Devil

Wait, am I going to HELL?!

Wait, I established in another thread that if I am going to Hell, that is definitely a win-win for me!

ROFLOL
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Phatt Matt s Offline
Bishop of the Labia Diocese
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#62
RE: Dear Christians
April 3, 2014 at 7:33 pm
(March 27, 2014 at 5:52 am)Godschild Wrote:
(March 23, 2014 at 6:30 am)Thunder Cunt Wrote: Why doesn't God give me what he promised in Scripture. I pray for grace to do His will. I need His guidance or I'm fucked!

You have to accept it.

GC

How do I do that? I tried already Angry
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ShaMan Offline
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#63
RE: Dear Christians
April 3, 2014 at 7:40 pm
When one of my Christian buddies called my paganistic beliefs 'barbaric' I asked him what he thought about human sacrifice, to which he said... "It's wicked and from Satan!"

It'll probably hit him in 3... 2... Panic
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NoraBrimstone Offline Donators
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#64
Re: RE: Dear Christians
April 3, 2014 at 7:42 pm
(April 3, 2014 at 7:40 pm)ShaMan Wrote: When one of my Christian buddies called my paganistic beliefs 'barbaric' I asked him what he thought about human sacrifice, to which he said... "It's wicked and from Satan!"

It'll probably hit him in 3... 2... :panic:
Your friend needs to read the Bible. Especially the part where Jesus is a Human Sacrifice. That bit's kinda important in Christianity.
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Phatt Matt s Offline
Bishop of the Labia Diocese
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#65
RE: Dear Christians
April 3, 2014 at 7:53 pm (This post was last modified: April 3, 2014 at 7:54 pm by Phatt Matt s.)
(April 3, 2014 at 7:40 pm)ShaMan Wrote: When one of my Christian buddies called my paganistic beliefs 'barbaric' I asked him what he thought about human sacrifice, to which he said... "It's wicked and from Satan!"

It'll probably hit him in 3... 2... Panic

Dewd! IF I get paralyzed in an accident or sick will you please cut out my heart to your fertilility God? I don't want to die or kill myself unless it is a meritorious sacrifice to the Devil! Devil

Eat my corpse if that goes well with your Religion.
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ShaMan Offline
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#66
RE: Dear Christians
April 3, 2014 at 7:58 pm
(April 3, 2014 at 7:53 pm)Thunder Cunt Wrote:
(April 3, 2014 at 7:40 pm)ShaMan Wrote: When one of my Christian buddies called my paganistic beliefs 'barbaric'...
Eat my corpse if that goes well with your Religion.
I've already said that if it walked I don't eat it. With respect to cutting out your heart - no. I'll save that practice for the savages Wink Shades
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Tonus Offline
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#67
RE: Dear Christians
April 4, 2014 at 12:37 pm
(April 3, 2014 at 7:33 pm)Thunder Cunt Wrote:
(March 27, 2014 at 5:52 am)Godschild Wrote: You have to accept it.
How do I do that? I tried already Angry
Did you use Vaseline?
"Well, evolution is a theory. It is also a fact. And facts and theories are different things, not rungs in a hierarchy of increasing certainty. Facts are the world's data. Theories are structures of ideas that explain and interpret facts. Facts don't go away when scientists debate rival theories to explain them. Einstein's theory of gravitation replaced Newton's in this century, but apples didn't suspend themselves in midair, pending the outcome. And humans evolved from ape- like ancestors whether they did so by Darwin's proposed mechanism or by some other yet to be discovered."

-Stephen Jay Gould
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tor Away
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#68
RE: Dear Christians
April 4, 2014 at 12:44 pm
Christianity is a lie.
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Phatt Matt s Offline
Bishop of the Labia Diocese
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#69
RE: Dear Christians
April 4, 2014 at 6:26 pm
(April 3, 2014 at 7:58 pm)ShaMan Wrote:
(April 3, 2014 at 7:53 pm)Thunder Cunt Wrote: Eat my corpse if that goes well with your Religion.
I've already said that if it walked I don't eat it. With respect to cutting out your heart - no. I'll save that practice for the savages Wink Shades

What if it walked and it asked you to eat it? Would you be a good Samaritan?
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KUSA Offline
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#70
Re: RE: Dear Christians
April 4, 2014 at 8:03 pm
(April 4, 2014 at 6:26 pm)Thunder Cunt Wrote: What if it walked and it asked you to eat it? Would you be a good Samaritan?

Like this?[Image: e9urahag.jpg]
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Dear Christians

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