(June 7, 2014 at 10:10 am)vorlon13 Wrote: Don't forget to repudiate the figs.

What are you babbling about?

Given what you've told us, I say it's not worth making a big deal out of it. Just bear with it.

We were suggesting topics that might interest the religious in-laws. Gay marriage, Tammy Faye, pervert TV preaches, and Jesus' intense hatred of figs, as noted in holy scripture.

Fundamentalists love talking shop.

I feel like the only thing you can or should do is to either politely excuse yourself during the prayer, or continue endure and to not participate. If you are at their house, it would be rude to interrupt their ritual.

If you want to express your displeasure, you could calmly state things from your perspective. But stay on your side of the tracks. Don't make them perpetrators, but just say that you are uncomfortable, and therefore you're going to remove yourself from the situation so as not to interrupt their prayer. Keep all the onus on you, not them.

They are allowed their prayer. It is not incumbent on them to change their daily ritual to accommodate you. They are not being rude by praying. But you are absolutely allowed to advocate for yourself and remove yourself from the situation.

To SteelCurtain and all the generous replies, a huge thank you. I love the idea of keeping it low key, and I think I'll do as suggested below and politely excuse myself during the prayer. Brilliant.

(June 7, 2014 at 11:31 am)SteelCurtain Wrote: I feel like the only thing you can or should do is to either politely excuse yourself during the prayer, or continue endure and to not participate. If you are at their house, it would be rude to interrupt their ritual.

If you want to express your displeasure, you could calmly state things from your perspective. But stay on your side of the tracks. Don't make them perpetrators, but just say that you are uncomfortable, and therefore you're going to remove yourself from the situation so as not to interrupt their prayer. Keep all the onus on you, not them.

They are allowed their prayer. It is not incumbent on them to change their daily ritual to accommodate you. They are not being rude by praying. But you are absolutely allowed to advocate for yourself and remove yourself from the situation.

I would go and offer to do the prayer before the meal. Then I would be sure to not mention god even once. Instead, I would offer secular gratitude.

Oh, and
Hope you stick around Matthew!

This sort of thing can build up in your mind and become something huge. Truth is, it isn't. It's 30 seconds of your time wasted. Of course it's 30 seconds your can spend thinking about anything in the universe, so maybe it's not even that.

Ultimately their house their rules. Just go with the flow dude. There are much bigger fish to fry.

Now if this was at your house....

Welcome, OP

Sounds to me like you're just looking for a little drama. Why?

I usually just ignore it. Bow my head, close my eyes, and wait. We don't always need to unanimously recite the lord's prayer or anything. It's a little irritating with the nieces, since i spent over 20 years not needing to waste time when I'm just around my immediate family. A few times a year is barely noticeable. Three times a day, a few days a week when they visit, grinds my nerves a bit.

I have been called out for saying something short from time to time, when most everyone else says a whole prayer, or spends thirty seconds talking. "Thank you lord for this meal and all the good things in life. Amen.". That's all I care to say.