(September 12, 2014 at 10:42 am)sswhateverlove Wrote: How does "some of your members could benefit from" get interpreted as "everyone here needs to"?

I acknowledged my ignorance where it was due and apologized.

What more do you want from me?

I apologize that my attempt hyperbole was not clear enough. I will attempt to be more plain and literal.

You are standing firm in your assertion that it is anyone at all ever who is an established member of this community who should change their approach to conversation here, rather than you, a person who has been here a day? And further, that it is incumbent upon you, said resident for one day, to instruct anyone at all ever who is an established member of this community in how to interact on the internet?

Hey, a proper introduction thread!

Welcome aboard.

(September 11, 2014 at 4:44 pm)sswhateverlove Wrote: So, it's been implied to me on numerous threads that unless I introduce myself I will continue to be insulted, regardless of the fact that all I'm trying to do is having a respectful, honest conversation about things that I've been finding when exploring many different sciences.

That's not why you were insulted (I would say 'corrected', not insulted, but whatever).

You were insulted because you came here and decided you had some special power to tell us how and what we think.

(September 12, 2014 at 11:08 am)Keri Wrote: No one called you a prat. He simply said that you remind him of someone and explained the situation.

Re-read that again and show me where he said sswhatever is a prat?

Exactly. It was an observation for some of the more long-standing members.

Oh, and at the risk of repeating myself, all posts come with a report button attached. Please feel free to click it for any post which you deem is in breach of the rules.

(September 12, 2014 at 10:56 am)sswhateverlove Wrote: Well, that's your opinion I suppose.

Indeed it is. Rather obviously so.

Quote:I've had to assert myself, yes, some people obviously don't care for me, fine. Otherwise, I'm having some interesting discussions via my threads and I'm teaching people about respect from a therapeutic perspective.

For someone self-proclaimed as an expert in "respect" you made a frankly horrible first impression due precisely to the fact you were clueless of this environment, didn't take the time to lurk/read/digest, and then tell us we are the ones with the problem. Not a very nuanced understanding of how to behave respectfully. Bull-in-china-shop <> respectful. Lack of humility <> respectful.

Quote:You're assumption of how well this is going for me is noted, but you're obviously not me, so you are not an expert.

Nor did I claim to be. Merely an observation love. I remain suspicious of your agenda, but will defer for now until further data points are gathered.

(September 12, 2014 at 11:05 am)Losty Wrote: There's debate here but this isn't a debate forum. This forum is a community.

A community that supports and encourages debate? Ok, I'm in

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(September 12, 2014 at 11:08 am)Keri Wrote:

(September 12, 2014 at 10:56 am)sswhateverlove Wrote: Well, your opinion is noted, but the intellectual discussions via my threads are going just fine now.

Here (on my Intro page btw- hello mods?) is where people continue telling me I'm being "prat" and I feel I have to keep defending myself.

Sooo.... yeah...

No one called you a prat. He simply said that you remind him of someone and explained the situation.

Re-read that again and show me where he said sswhatever is a prat?

The implication seemed to be that I too am like that person in that I'm assuming that I'm popular (or accepted in the community) because people are responding to me, but really most of the responses I'm getting are accusing me of being prat. Did I not understand this correctly?

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Quote:I have an honest question for you, no agenda.

Do you think the world would be a better place if we were all of the same or similar temperament?

Generally, not necessarily, but with regard to healthy relationships it does seem, at least from a psychological perspective, that the majority of people (if not all) would benefit from engaging each other according to some basic principles.

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(September 12, 2014 at 11:19 am)SteelCurtain Wrote:

(September 12, 2014 at 10:42 am)sswhateverlove Wrote: How does "some of your members could benefit from" get interpreted as "everyone here needs to"?

I acknowledged my ignorance where it was due and apologized.

What more do you want from me?

I apologize that my attempt hyperbole was not clear enough. I will attempt to be more plain and literal.

You are standing firm in your assertion that it is anyone at all ever who is an established member of this community who should change their approach to conversation here, rather than you, a person who has been here a day? And further, that it is incumbent upon you, said resident for one day, to instruct anyone at all ever who is an established member of this community in how to interact on the internet?

It's called being assertive with regard to my personal desires regarding how I'd like to be treated. Many people asserted their desires with regard to how I approached, and I acknowledged them and apologized, explaining I meant no offense.

(September 12, 2014 at 11:57 am)sswhateverlove Wrote: It's called being assertive with regard to my personal desires regarding how I'd like to be treated. Many people asserted their desires with regard to how I approached, and I acknowledged them and apologized, explaining I meant no offense.

Oh you're assertive alright. Yes you acknowledged and explained. What you failed to do was change your tactic. Apologies and admitting fault is a long walk from correction.

Quote:For someone self-proclaimed as an expert in "respect" you made a frankly horrible first impression due precisely to the fact you were clueless of this environment, didn't take the time to lurk/read/digest, and then tell us we are the ones with the problem. Not a very nuanced understanding of how to behave respectfully. Bull-in-china-shop <> respectful. Lack of humility <> respectful.

Being unaware of social expectations and mistakenly doing/saying something that causes someone else to be upset and then apologizing is not the same as intentionally doing/saying things with the intention of upsetting (and possibly scaring away?) the other and then blaming them for it.

First one I think is more excusable then the second.

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(September 12, 2014 at 12:11 pm)ShaMan Wrote:

(September 12, 2014 at 11:57 am)sswhateverlove Wrote: It's called being assertive with regard to my personal desires regarding how I'd like to be treated. Many people asserted their desires with regard to how I approached, and I acknowledged them and apologized, explaining I meant no offense.

Oh you're assertive alright. Yes you acknowledged and explained. What you failed to do was change your tactic. Apologies and admitting fault is a long walk from correction.

My tactic has not changed? Have you been following my threads?

Thinnest skin award. Hands down.

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(September 12, 2014 at 12:11 pm)sswhateverlove Wrote:

(September 12, 2014 at 12:11 pm)ShaMan Wrote: Oh you're assertive alright. Yes you acknowledged and explained. What you failed to do was change your tactic. Apologies and admitting fault is a long walk from correction.

My tactic has not changed? Have you been following my threads?

Example of you making ongoing presumptions and assertions.

(September 12, 2014 at 12:06 pm)ShaMan Wrote:

(September 12, 2014 at 11:47 am)sswhateverlove Wrote: Unfortunately, the truth, as I am going to explain it, will most likely make you uncomfortable. The truth will not feed your ego, build your confidence, or reinforce your faith in science.

A) The 'truth' according to you.
B) Your truth feeds only your ego.
C) I don't have 'faith' in science.

You continue to assert that I, and others hold certain beliefs, and that once 'challenged' we'll become uncomfortable in those beliefs. Again, you're wrong.

You call this brand of bullying being 'assertive'. Well, you certainly got the 'ass' part right. You're either dumb as cement or you're a meaningless troll. Either way, it's pretty clear that you're no 'agnostic'.

(September 12, 2014 at 12:14 pm)ShaMan Wrote: Thinnest skin award. Hands down.

I'm still here and voicing my opinion aren't I?

Not too thin apparently.

(September 12, 2014 at 11:57 am)sswhateverlove Wrote: It's called being assertive with regard to my personal desires regarding how I'd like to be treated. Many people asserted their desires with regard to how I approached, and I acknowledged them and apologized, explaining I meant no offense.

You will notice, however, that there is a difference between advocating for yourself, which is fine, and making demands on others who are established in a community where things run a certain way.

Put in context, if I walked into your practice, and started "being assertive" about how I wanted the treatment process to go, and how I wanted you to talk to me (different than the way your method requires) what would you say?