Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: December 15, 2024, 4:55 pm
Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

Thread Rating:
  • 1 Vote(s) - 5 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Thread Modes
joke time
ignoramus Offline
wiggle wiggle
*****
Religious Views: n/a
Posts: 20476
Threads: 447
Joined: June 16, 2014
Reputation: 111
#2821
RE: joke time
October 10, 2018 at 8:14 pm (This post was last modified: October 10, 2018 at 8:14 pm by ignoramus.)
^ That was bloody horrible!

Big Grin
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Find
Reply
no one Offline
That thing that should not be
****
Religious Views: Certainly not
Posts: 6112
Threads: 53
Joined: September 25, 2018
Reputation: 20
#2822
RE: joke time
October 10, 2018 at 9:16 pm
Why do Candaians do it doggie style?





So they both watch the Hockey game.
Find
Reply
Minimalist Offline Donators
Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
*****
Religious Views: Fuck It
Posts: 69247
Threads: 3759
Joined: August 2, 2009
Reputation: 259
#2823
RE: joke time
October 10, 2018 at 9:43 pm
Hey!  This guy digs the puck out better than my team so far this year!



Find
Reply
The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
*******
Religious Views: Time to end them
Posts: 35312
Threads: 205
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation: 146
#2824
RE: joke time
October 12, 2018 at 5:26 am
A woman asks, "What do you do after you orgasm? I like to lie in bed and snuggle!"

A guy responds, "Usually I delete my browser history and put the sock back under the bed."

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Find
Reply
Rhondazvous Offline
Help Me, Rhonda
****
Religious Views: Happy Heathen
Posts: 3676
Threads: 354
Joined: April 12, 2015
Reputation: 42
#2825
RE: joke time
October 12, 2018 at 10:38 am
I used to be schizophrenic. But we're ok now.
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.

I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.

Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire

Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
Find
Reply
Brian37 Offline
RationalPoet
*****
Religious Views: JGH 1933-2017 RIP MOM
Posts: 30726
Threads: 2123
Joined: May 24, 2012
Reputation: 71
#2826
RE: joke time
October 12, 2018 at 10:42 am
(October 12, 2018 at 10:38 am)Rhondazvous Wrote: I used to be schizophrenic. But we're ok now.

Schizophrenic goes into a Baskin Robbins and orders a banana split personality.
Poetry by Brian37(poems by an atheist) Also on Facebook as BrianJames Rational Poet and Twitter Brianrrs37  I also have a new blog here at https://www.brianjamesrationalpoet.blog
Find
Reply
Rhondazvous Offline
Help Me, Rhonda
****
Religious Views: Happy Heathen
Posts: 3676
Threads: 354
Joined: April 12, 2015
Reputation: 42
#2827
RE: joke time
October 12, 2018 at 11:18 am
Caller: Hello, is this Schwartz, Schwartz, and Schwartz
Residents: Yes, who would you like to speak to?
Caller: I'm calling for Schwartz.
Resident: He's not here right now.
Caller: Oh, then can I speak to Schwartz
Resident: He's asleep. Shall I wake him.
Caller: No, let him sleep. But can I speak to Schwartz?
Resident: Speaking.
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.

I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.

Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire

Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
Find
Reply
Abaddon_ire Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: Atheist
Posts: 2872
Threads: 8
Joined: October 4, 2017
Reputation: 22
#2828
RE: joke time
October 12, 2018 at 11:50 am
I used to run a dating website for chickens, but I had to give it up.

I just couldn't make hens meet.
Find
Reply
Brian37 Offline
RationalPoet
*****
Religious Views: JGH 1933-2017 RIP MOM
Posts: 30726
Threads: 2123
Joined: May 24, 2012
Reputation: 71
#2829
RE: joke time
October 12, 2018 at 11:58 am (This post was last modified: October 12, 2018 at 12:08 pm by Brian37.)
(October 12, 2018 at 11:50 am)Abaddon_ire Wrote: I used to run a dating website for chickens, but I had to give it up.

I just couldn't make hens meet.

You really laid an egg with that one.......
Cashier to customer, " Have a nice day."

Customer to cashier, "THAT'S A NICE THING TO SAY....... No, really, that is a nice thing to say."
Poetry by Brian37(poems by an atheist) Also on Facebook as BrianJames Rational Poet and Twitter Brianrrs37  I also have a new blog here at https://www.brianjamesrationalpoet.blog
Find
Reply
downbeatplumb Offline
Posting Freak
*****
Religious Views: What is a God anyway?
Posts: 13901
Threads: 263
Joined: January 11, 2009
Reputation: 82
#2830
RE: joke time
October 12, 2018 at 2:06 pm
(October 10, 2018 at 8:00 pm)Brian37 Wrote: Hollywood is coming out with a new blockbuster movie expected to win an Oscar about the founder of Tampex. Critics are calling it the best period piece in Hollywood history.

I'll give it a miss. I've heard its quite bloody.



You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.

Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.




 








Find
Reply


Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  No joke -- I have decided to convert to Christianity! Jehanne 10 2749 April 23, 2021 at 9:54 pm
Last Post: arewethereyet
  A sacred joke. Mystic 15 3310 January 20, 2018 at 10:00 pm
Last Post: Cyberman
  Big Bang Theory Neil Tyson joke Brian37 1 1607 May 18, 2016 at 8:07 pm
Last Post: vorlon13
  There Has To Be A Joke Here, Somewhere! Minimalist 3 2539 October 1, 2014 at 10:57 pm
Last Post: Zidneya
  Joke Minimalist 59 18802 June 27, 2014 at 12:25 am
Last Post: Ravenshire
  A little joke Sup 11 4743 April 10, 2014 at 7:33 pm
Last Post: BrianSoddingBoru4
  Evolution (is a) joke JesusLover1 12 9434 March 2, 2014 at 6:24 pm
Last Post: Minimalist
  Preacher joke 02 Drich 2 1993 February 12, 2014 at 7:15 am
Last Post: NoraBrimstone
  Preacher joke 01 Drich 8 4844 January 20, 2014 at 12:31 am
Last Post: Drich
  Make Up An Atheist Joke freedomfromforum 5 3050 October 6, 2013 at 12:30 am
Last Post: Angrboda



Users browsing this thread: 184 Guest(s)