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RE: joke time
March 30, 2020 at 5:49 pm
(This post was last modified: March 30, 2020 at 5:52 pm by A. Secular Human.)
(March 27, 2020 at 1:51 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: How many surrealist sculptors does it take to change a lightbulb?
Boru
I would have had the giraffe "melting", in a nod to Dali.
(March 28, 2020 at 4:10 am)The Valkyrie Wrote: Guys, the best sexual position is the JFK.
That's when you splash all over her as she screams and tries to get out of the car.
I would have called that the "Teddy Kennedy".
Disappointing theists since 1968!
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RE: joke time
March 30, 2020 at 6:56 pm
(This post was last modified: March 30, 2020 at 6:57 pm by ignoramus.)
Is now a good excuse time to practice social distancing with your mother in law? Parents? Wife? Ex-wife? Boss? Kids?
As an introvert, I say: Now we're rocking! 
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RE: joke time
March 30, 2020 at 6:58 pm
I social distanced a mandolin sale just a bit ago.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
March 30, 2020 at 7:00 pm
(This post was last modified: March 30, 2020 at 7:00 pm by ignoramus.)
In all honesty, are millennials even gonna notice? Or Care? Seriously?
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RE: joke time
March 30, 2020 at 7:14 pm
(March 30, 2020 at 5:41 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: A koala is sitting in a tree smoking joints when a lizard notices him.
"What are you doing?" Asks the lizard.
"Sitting in my tree getting high!" Replies the koala. "Come on up and join me!"
Not one to turn down an invitation, the lizard climbs the tree and starts smoking joints with the koala.
After the fourth joint, the lizard says, "I need a drink of water." He walks slowly across the branch but is so stoned he slips and fall into the river below.
He's swept quite a way down river but is rescued by a crocodile, who notices his weird behaviour.
"What's wrong with you?" The crocodile asks.
The lizard explains about the koala getting high in the tree and the crocodile decides he needs to see this. So he swims up river until he reaches the tree where the koala is still smoking his joints.
The koala watches the crocodile emerge from the water and shouts, "Wow, dude. How much fuckin water did you drink?"
Q: Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
A: Because it was dead.
Q: Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?
A: Because the first koala hit him on the way down.
Q: Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?
A: Because he thought it was a game and joined in.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
March 30, 2020 at 8:00 pm
(March 30, 2020 at 7:14 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: (March 30, 2020 at 5:41 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: A koala is sitting in a tree smoking joints when a lizard notices him.
"What are you doing?" Asks the lizard.
"Sitting in my tree getting high!" Replies the koala. "Come on up and join me!"
Not one to turn down an invitation, the lizard climbs the tree and starts smoking joints with the koala.
After the fourth joint, the lizard says, "I need a drink of water." He walks slowly across the branch but is so stoned he slips and fall into the river below.
He's swept quite a way down river but is rescued by a crocodile, who notices his weird behaviour.
"What's wrong with you?" The crocodile asks.
The lizard explains about the koala getting high in the tree and the crocodile decides he needs to see this. So he swims up river until he reaches the tree where the koala is still smoking his joints.
The koala watches the crocodile emerge from the water and shouts, "Wow, dude. How much fuckin water did you drink?"
Q: Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
A: Because it was dead.
Q: Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?
A: Because the first koala hit him on the way down.
Q: Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?
A: Because he thought it was a game and joined in.
Boru
Drop bears
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
March 30, 2020 at 8:30 pm
Q: What did one koala say to the other koala?
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
March 30, 2020 at 8:56 pm
I have my own bad taste visual joke.
I ask if anyone wants to see my impersonation of Eric Clapton's downstairs neighbour.
Then I look up, and then look down quickly, as though I've watched something fall past my window.
Some people appreciate it. Clapton fans do not.
Like the ceramic skull on my desk at work named Elvis.
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
March 30, 2020 at 9:42 pm
Here in Au, 2 is company and three is a crime.
Our "Swingers" political party is now filing for bankruptcy.
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RE: joke time
March 30, 2020 at 9:49 pm
(March 30, 2020 at 8:56 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: I have my own bad taste visual joke.
I ask if anyone wants to see my impersonation of Eric Clapton's downstairs neighbour.
Then I look up, and then look down quickly, as though I've watched something fall past my window.
Some people appreciate it. Clapton fans do not.
Like the ceramic skull on my desk at work named Elvis.
I has a sads about that Clapton joke.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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