Alabamian Atheist in Need of Advice

[popeyespappy]

Howdy Neighbor! What part of the Heart of Dixie are you in? I've spent most of my life in Huntsville although I'm currently parking my butt in south Texas on a job.

As others have said I would think twice about coming out until you get a little older. That could be more trouble than it is worth. In the meantime you should be able to find some locals with similar thinking around your age online if you look. And there's always here if not...

[Celi]

Hello and welcome.

Alabama is like a complete clichè here. People assosiate it with teethless rednecks who whilest drunk, beat up there wifes after having sex with their sisters.

If you should happen to come here one day you will notice that when Germans in the north talk about Bavaria they might sometimes say:

"Bavaria is Germany`s Texas/Alabama/Georgia"

There really are some people like that, except for the incest part. But for the most part, I think the most significant difference between people here and in other parts of the country is that practically everyone is a protestant Christian, and the stuff that that entails.

I'm in Gadsden, the town with the coolest name in at least this state. If only there was anything else cool about it.

[Aardverk]

Similar advice from me, except that I would think more than twice about calling yourself an 'atheist' at all - ever. Bear in mind that even Richard Dawkins calls himself an agnostic (6.9 on a 7 point scale) to leave himself just that little bit of room in case of new information.

The very word 'atheist' gets theists knickers in a twist for no good reason. Unless you really want to start a fight with your Christian family and neighbors, just stick with agnostic. You never need say that you are 99% atheist unless you really want to wind them up. Just keep innocently asking them why? Why? Why?

There is a good case to be made that an out and out, 100%, adamant 'atheist' is just as closed minded as a 'theist'. It is the percentage that makes you sane or deluded. There are plenty of sane Christians out there, they just don't make their doubts very public in Alabama.

Best of luck. Do test the water carefully.

[Minimalist]

Welcome, young fellow.

Difficult situation you've described and you are certainly not the first.

One thing about believers is that they will be more tolerant of belief in something else rather than belief in nothing. Atheism is too much of an attack on them. What if you just distance yourself from that church without indicating that you reject god totally? As you say " the older I got the less I liked the idea of a murderous, misogynistic, jealous, voyueristic control freak who tortures you forever if you don't love him governing the universe." Throw in the political stances of these so-called churches and just say you are looking for something else? Something more positive?

They might just put that off to a teenage "phase" but if you can live with half-measures it is something to consider. In 10 years when you are out on your own you can announce that its all crap and you are done with it. Hopefully by then you'll have gotten the hell out of Alabama.

[Celi]

Similar advice from me, except that I would think more than twice about calling yourself an 'atheist' at all - ever. Bear in mind that even Richard Dawkins calls himself an agnostic (6.9 on a 7 point scale) to leave himself just that little bit of room in case of new information.

The very word 'atheist' gets theists knickers in a twist for no good reason. Unless you really want to start a fight with your Christian family and neighbors, just stick with agnostic. You never need say that you are 99% atheist unless you really want to wind them up. Just keep innocently asking them why? Why? Why?

There is a good case to be made that an out and out, 100%, adamant 'atheist' is just as closed minded as a 'theist'. It is the percentage that makes you sane or deluded. There are plenty of sane Christians out there, they just don't make their doubts very public in Alabama.

Best of luck. Do test the water carefully.

Well, of course you can never be 100% sure, but "atheist" is a better descriptor for me than "agnostic". I use "atheist" in the same way Dawkins does. Agnostic implies that you think there's actually some decent chance that God exists. I'm a 7 as far as, say, Christianity goes--the logic just doesn't follow through, so I believe in Yahweh's non-existence is the same sense that I believe two times four absolutely does not make seventy-nine. As far as the existence of a less absurd non-physical deity, I'm a six-point-something.

But I do get your point. "Atheist" can be synonymous with "sinner", while "agnostic" can mean "lost". I think people sometimes confuse not believing in God with hating God, and so get angry at that word.

There was one girl, though, who was openly lesbian and atheist (and used that word) who started coming to Wednesday night youth meetings at my church, and she was totally accepted.

Welcome, young fellow.

Difficult situation you've described and you are certainly not the first.

One thing about believers is that they will be more tolerant of belief in something else rather than belief in nothing. Atheism is too much of an attack on them. What if you just distance yourself from that church without indicating that you reject god totally? As you say " the older I got the less I liked the idea of a murderous, misogynistic, jealous, voyueristic control freak who tortures you forever if you don't love him governing the universe." Throw in the political stances of these so-called churches and just say you are looking for something else? Something more positive?

They might just put that off to a teenage "phase" but if you can live with half-measures it is something to consider. In 10 years when you are out on your own you can announce that its all crap and you are done with it. Hopefully by then you'll have gotten the hell out of Alabama.

Yeah, I half-knew when I typed that that I'd have to remove it. I'm not actually trying to piss people off, after all. But I've never even heard the word "pragmatism"--when I went to public school, I actually sort of enjoyed getting non-physically bullied because bullies are idiots and easy to win arguments against. I can handle people getting irrationally angry with me, and I'm already used to being shunned/ignored by most people my own age. Half the reason I want to come out anyway is that I'm tired of lying about this. I don't care if other people hate me for saying this--I'm Chaotic Good like that--I'm mostly just worried about my parents at this point. My relationship with them is strained enough as it is.

By the way, female pronouns, please.

[Angrboda]

I don't have any advice to give, but I wish you luck in whatever path you choose.

[Minimalist]

By the way, female pronouns, please. Smile

Thanks for the tip.

[KichigaiNeko]

Celi

[catfish]

Welcome to the elitist zone Celi! :-)

I have some advice for you if you wish to "come out" as they say...

"No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them,"
"Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you"

Fundies hate it when you use their book to defend your position... :-) Just blame God for your disbelief, what can they say to that???
.

[Celi]

Welcome to the elitist zone Celi! :-)

I have some advice for you if you wish to "come out" as they say...

"No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them,"
"Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you"

Fundies hate it when you use their book to defend your position... :-) Just blame God for your disbelief, what can they say to that???
.

Thanks!

Heh, that's a good idea. Luckily, though, I don't think any of the Christians I know are really fundies, exactly. Here, everybody's Christian, which means that being Christian doesn't mean much of anything. Loads of people just live according to their own morals with a paper-thin surface belief (although that never stops them from quoting the Bible when it seems to back up their political views). That's why I'm actually considering this in the first place--I would be more prudent if I knew many real religious nuts.