Feeling pretty gutted

[MTL]

delete

[ignoramus]

MTL, I think you need to read this article.

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-condi...n-20027920

Antisocial personality disorder signs and symptoms may include:

Disregard for right and wrong
Persistent lying or deceit to exploit others
Using charm or wit to manipulate others for personal gain or for sheer personal pleasure
Intense egocentrism, sense of superiority and exhibitionism
Recurring difficulties with the law
Repeatedly violating the rights of others by the use of intimidation, dishonesty and misrepresentation
Child abuse or neglect
Hostility, significant irritability, agitation, impulsiveness, aggression or violence
Lack of empathy for others and lack of remorse about harming others
Unnecessary risk-taking or dangerous behaviors
Poor or abusive relationships
Irresponsible work behavior
Failure to learn from the negative consequences of behavior

Hey Rocket, boy that sounds eerily similar to how "we" would all describe some of the special "theists" here!  hehe

[Edwardo Piet]

Some much more than others!

[GrandizerII]

I worked and went to school at the same time. Didn't see it as a "great sacrifice." More like great opportunity. I guess times change.

So you were fortunate enough to be the right kind of person and be given the right circumstances to see this as a great opportunity. Good for you. Some people aren't so fortunate and may see it as a great sacrifice instead depending on what they're going through.

Did you know every individual responds to the same thing differently depending on their temperament? Or do you only see things from your own perspective, failing to empathize with the fact that people will think differently from you?

[GrandizerII]

MTL, I think you need to read this article.

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-condi...n-20027920

Thanks for the link, Rocket.

I do think my sister has some sort of issue;
but she doesn't fit that particular description to a T.

and most of her negative behaviour, as far as I'm aware,
is only toward me.

I HAVE noticed that some of her friends....and all of her boyfriends...seem to be people who tend to use HER;

and I have noticed that she, my mother, my grandmother, and my aunt (my mother's mother and older sister)
are all very much alike, insofar as they only seem to understand relationships in a "hierarchy" format,
where there is a social ladder or "pecking order".

The concept of "mutual respect" seems to evade them.

It does look like she may be suffering from some Cluster B personality disorder, from what you've described. Histrionic/narcissistic, probably. But I agree with you best to not worry about labels and just focus on her specific set of behaviours at hand that bother you.

[MTL]

I worked and went to school at the same time. Didn't see it as a "great sacrifice." More like great opportunity. I guess times change.

So you were fortunate enough to be the right kind of person and be given the right circumstances to see this as a great opportunity. Good for you. Some people aren't so fortunate and may see it as a great sacrifice instead depending on what they're going through.

Did you know every individual responds to the same thing differently depending on their temperament? Or do you only see things from your own perspective, failing to empathize with the fact that people will think differently from you?

That is very true.

However, as I said, it is NOT the mere going to school and working at the same time, that I consider a sacrifice.

In fact, that would actually be easier for me...but if I go that way, I would have to sacrifice some OTHER things.

But it's rather personal to get into.

And, as I said in the original OP, I never really intended to subject everyone here to my sob story;

I really just needed a bit of a shoulder to cry on, that's all.

And I appreciate everyone's kind support, respect for my privacy, and abstaining from passing judgement on a situation wherein they are not privy to all the details.

[MTL]

Thanks for the link, Rocket.

I do think my sister has some sort of issue;
but she doesn't fit that particular description to a T.

and most of her negative behaviour, as far as I'm aware,
is only toward me.

I HAVE noticed that some of her friends....and all of her boyfriends...seem to be people who tend to use HER;

and I have noticed that she, my mother, my grandmother, and my aunt (my mother's mother and older sister)
are all very much alike, insofar as they only seem to understand relationships in a "hierarchy" format,
where there is a social ladder or "pecking order".

The concept of "mutual respect" seems to evade them.

It does look like she may be suffering from some Cluster B personality disorder, from what you've described. Histrionic/narcissistic, probably. But I agree with you best to not worry about labels and just focus on her specific set of behaviours at hand that bother you.

Yeah, it leans toward the narcissistic.  I'm not an expert.  but you've got the kernel of the matter.

It's absolutely redundant to seek the respect of people whom you, yourself, cannot respect!!!

[John V]

I worked and went to school at the same time. Didn't see it as a "great sacrifice." More like great opportunity. I guess times change.

So you were fortunate enough to be the right kind of person and be given the right circumstances to see this as a great opportunity. Good for you. Some people aren't so fortunate and may see it as a great sacrifice instead depending on what they're going through.

Did you know every individual responds to the same thing differently depending on their temperament? Or do you only see things from your own perspective, failing to empathize with the fact that people will think differently from you?

I think many people fall back on their "temperament" as an excuse for why they can't work hard to improve their circumstances.

[brewer]

Some have suggested a therapist, you say that you can't afford it. That is understandable.

OK, have you considered any self help/group therapy? The cost is minimal. There seem to be quite a few in your area. Might be worth at least checking out.

Just don't do the "Fight Club" thing. (hehe)

[robvalue]

If you want to PM me the full version, I'd be happy to read it if it would help

From everything I've read from you, I'd be extremely surprised if your assessment of the situation wasn't accurate. Your sister sounds like a horrible, jealous person. I know how cutting family ties can be a lot easier said than done, I'm caught in some myself with people I'd rather be rid of.

I hope you'll be OK, I'm here if I can do anything to help