Biblical Christianity 101, a study of the book of Romans

[KevinM1]

"You guys don't know biblical Christianity and sound like hateful bigots!"
"Why's that?"
"Because you don't agree with my interpretation of the bible and don't treat it with the respect I demand!"

This whole thread presumes we should care about the bible.  I fail to see why.

Here's an Idea..
READ THE OP SPORT

I have.

Here's the thing: Christianity is not hard to decipher.  The bible has a shit ton of detail about lineages and whatnot, but the basic story is very simple -

Mankind is cursed with sin due to Adam and Eve engaging in the Original Sin.
God does stuff with the Jews, makes commandments, demands sacrifices, smites people, etc.
After a time, he decides to give humanity an out, so he sends himself (or, a portion of himself) down to live among the people and teach them the right way to live.
Cue: virgin birth, blah blah blah
Jesus performs some miracles, gains a following among the locals, and becomes a threat to Roman control of the area.  Claims to have fulfilled the old prophecies of the coming messiah, but, eh, let's agree to disagree.
He gets sold out by Judas, learns about it/already knew it would happen, has a crisis of conscious where he prays... to himself (lol), and lets himself be tortured and crucified to death.
In doing so, since he was the epitome of innocence and righteousness, his sacrifice magically gives the rest of humanity a way out of perpetual sin... so long as they believe that Jesus was actually the messiah, of course.
Jesus is resurrected three days later, does a quick farewell tour/victory lap, and rejoins himself (lol) in heaven.

You can quibble about the details all you want.  That's the crux of the story.  The blood price paid by Jesus saves humanity, who would otherwise all be sent to writhe and burn in the hell his Phase 2 form created earlier.

It's a story with a ton of problems.  Masturbating over the details of the story doesn't address those problems.  And because the problems are so systemic (you need to take the bible's word for, well, just about everything... sorry, no; holy backwards morality letting someone else take the fall for what may or may not be my flaws; etc.) and obvious, I cannot take the tale seriously.  Nor can many others.

So, to go back around to the beginning: why should I care about your attempt to educate me?  Is it going to fix all of the problems the core story has with:

Morality?
Biology?
Physics?

Likely not.