RE: Taking care of elderly family being only child.
December 10, 2015 at 5:15 pm
(This post was last modified: December 10, 2015 at 5:17 pm by Brian37.)
(December 10, 2015 at 3:33 pm)mh.brewer Wrote: Please don't try to take her decision making capacity away from her. That's one of the last things elderly prize because it makes them feel independent. That they are in control of their own life.
I'm not saying don't have discussions with her about decisions. Sometimes the elderly don't see the potential negative impacts that some decisions can have, especially the big decisions.
Help her make the best informed decisions that she can. I'm afraid if you take that away it will only cause a resentment.
Oh no, she gets most of what she wants most of the time. Its only when she is coming out of the hospital I become more insistent. It took her forever to finally give up a wobbly red recliner rocker. She is now glad she gave it up for a lift chair.
Oh no the worst she gets with me is annoyed, we have a really close relationship and we butt heads over lots of things even outside health issues, but we never stay angry or hold grudges. But yea, I know what you are saying, she is independent but sometimes I think she gets ahead of herself. It is still up to her you are right. It is just hard sometimes striking that balance.
She's great in tons of ways. She is a social liberal, although a mostly lifetime voting republican. She told me a couple months ago she likes Bernie Sanders, that impressed the heck out of me. She's a great listener and even asks me about my online debates with my rivals. She's much more open to being silly unlike when I was a kid. I think she sees the way others interact with me and gets me much more than we got each other when I was a kid.
The only thing that frustrates me is that she gets more concerned about the way something looks, rather than the pragmatism of what she needs and her safety, like insisting on having that rocking recliner she finally got rid of. It's the recovery aspect. Once she gets past this I'll be much more relaxed and her predilections wont bother me as much.
