(December 10, 2015 at 9:56 pm)Thena323 Wrote: I'm in agreement with you on that. But, sometimes you have no choice but to take the wheel from them. Especially when they've made a left turn into oncoming traffic.
This actually happened while I was driving with my father several years ago. He'd had a series of minor bumps and scrapes while driving, so we made it a point to try and tag along with him as much as possible when he drove. After he'd made the turn, he still didn't realize why I'd started screaming. I had to take the wheel and steer the car onto the median from the passenger's seat. My family I decided that he could no longer be allowed to drive after that, and he harbored a great deal of resentment for quite some time.
I felt horribly for him, losing his last vestige of independence. It was devastating to him, but nowhere near the devastation and guilt we all would've felt if he'd killed a family with his vehicle because of our inaction.
The decision of when and if to stop driving seems to a point where many adult children find themselves at odds with aging parents who want to maintain their independence.
Valid point. When they become a threat/danger (cause harm) to themselves or others that's when someone has to step in. Especially if they can't see the danger themselves. That creates a hell of a lot of resentment.
In some cases we try to get a third party to make the decision. For driving I've used the DMV (make them retest) or insurance company (cancel insurance). Other times for cases of diminished mental capacity use a patient advocate, physician, court, (residential placement, restricted environment, financial control, ........). That makes the children/family less of the bad guy.
Any way it happens, it's rarely good.
Being told you're delusional does not necessarily mean you're mental.
