Still struggling.

[Socratic Meth Head]

I'm 14, turn 15 in May.

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She finally scheduled it, I'm going next Wednesday, I'm going to try and get my brother to take me because I can't trust my mom to drive me there.

Only 3 years to emancipation!  Geesh, a twinkle of the eye!  My advice:

1)  Don't talk to Mom or Dad or anyone else (except, for us) about religion, including, your therapist.  Your private beliefs (or lack thereof) really don't belong in therapy.

2)  Use the Tor Browser to keep your Internet activities a secret.

3)  Consider seeing a psychiatrist; medication has improved a lot over the last generation.

4)  Just "roll with it"; give yourself and everyone else around you a break.

5)  Plan carefully what you're going to do when you turn 18.  "Get a haircut, get a job, don't be a slob."

1: They already know, and always bring up debate.

2: I could, but there would be much to hide.

3: My therapists and I have already talked about this a few weeks ago, I will be seeing one when a position opens up and he can schedule one for me.

4: Rolling with it isn't my strong suit. If someone brings me into something I usually get involved to get myself out of it.

5: Plan on going to college. I kinda aspire to be an astrophysicist, biologist, or writer. Those are main interests.

With the debates I have had with my mom, she says "You have to seek the truth." under the presumption that the bible is the ultimate truth, I am constantly ganged up on by my family and they call my lack of any faith for a god stupid. My brother, dad, other brother(who is a pantheist and not a christian), and mom always quad team me and I get to speak and then they all 4 just bother me. If I say I do not want to debate I end up getting dragged into it/seen as vulnerable and I get harassed more.


Getting outside more would be just as detrimental to me because I would frequently be in anxiety and I would loose it. I've already "flown off the handle" more than once and going outside would increase that ten fold.

I have been ridiculed by my family for reading Richard Dawkins books, they say things very mockingly to me for having passion for things.

Although I love my mom she is going to HAVE to change if she wants me to get any better with OCD. She tells me of unproven/alternative health practices that do no benefit and she will not seek out proven/medical ones. She has told me to "get right with god" when I first complained about my suspicion that I had OCD, it was only after my dad took me to see my therapist that that suspicion was confirmed and I was able to get a little better, until she stopped taking me.

I am 99% sure that she doesn't know how mentally tormenting  it can be for anyone with any disorder. I wouldn't wish it upon even the worst scum of the earth.

I wouldn't call any of the above "abuse" but I wouldn't call it a good way to raise a child either. I can't tell if I'm unlucky or lucky to be born in this family. We have a distant ancestry with a president, James Madison, and we are financially stable. At the same time though my parents show off persistent flaws in their way of approaching mental and even physical pains. I am going to have to deal with it until I'm 18. Even when I told them I didn't wanna go to movies or church because of anxiety, they made me go 2x more often. I told them I'd like to be left alone, and I was "showered" with more attention than before. (Showered in this case is used negatively)