RE: So...Catholics stole my family.
April 2, 2011 at 5:35 am
(This post was last modified: April 2, 2011 at 5:41 am by Emporion.)
(April 1, 2011 at 1:49 pm)reverendjeremiah Wrote: Perhaps people who believe in the Rapture should pay higher insurance rates to cover the costs if it does happen of their unmanned cars running into other cars. It is quite careless of them to plan on disapearing at any giving moment and not caring about the harm caused by their instantaneous disapearance.
..then watch how quick many Christians tell the auto insurance companies that they dont believe in the rapture to avoid the payments.
I have heard many atheists say they would freak out if they saw the rapture. Me, I admit I would be shocked. I would be like "you mean to tell me that doomsday cult was right? That mythology was right?".. and then my reaction would depend on factors.
Situatuion #1 - The people being raptured are the Limbaughs, Becks, Pat robertsons, Falwells of the world. If such is the case I will be dancing and singing in the street. I would actually say "Well, I guess god is real after all, and he obviously did a kindness to this world by removing that filth. Sadly, any god who chooses that sort of ilk to populate paradise doesnt deserve to be worshipped, nor would I want to spend eternity around such flagrant egomaniacs. I will move into their houses and organize block parties that would last WEEKS. My only regret will be that God didnt take the extremist Muslims as well..thereby creating true peace on earth.
Situation #2 - The cool christians get raptured, and the dick christians (Limbaughs, Becks, Pat robertsons, Falwells ) are left to populate the Earth with the non-believers. If that happens I will shake my fist at the sky and demand that Jesus get fucked! What kind of benevolent creator does such horrid things such as leaving me on a planet populated by the most extremist and hateful religious types? Why not just kill me and put me out of my fucking misery?
Situation #3 - The sky unravels and the mountains crumble as Allah comes back to judge his creation. The cool christians and cool atheists are shocked at this spectacle..neither saw THIS coming! Every asshole christian in the world begins to panic, and they eventually blame this on liberal christians..accusing them of pushing away Muslims in a conspiracy to keep the conservatives from reaching paradise.
Situation #4 - WAR! The midgard serpent releases his hold on the oceans of the world and allows the waters to fall off the edge to quench the thirst of the roots of Yggdrasil. Mighty Thor strikes that foul serpent, son of Loki, twixt the eyes with his mighty Mjolner and then drowns in that snakes venom. All of the gods and goddesses dies in the battle except for Baldur (who came back from the dead) and the sons of Thor, who then renew the Earth without without the fire and frost giants (no more volcanos or winter time on this planet). If that happens then I hope Thor smiles upon me for liking his mythology the most.
Nice. If the rapture really comes and I can't prevent it in any way, I...I...I...will.....hide behind Fr0d0 so that I don't get judged!
I guess Jebus will have to kill one of his believers to get to me.
